Sacred Thread Ceremony? (Any BB'ers of Indian descent that can help me with this?)

[Beth Y]

My DH said "I have something you need to ask your BB about". He knows that SOMEONE on this board knows something about everything!:D

He has been invited to a Upanayanam (Sacred Thread Ceremony) for an employee's son. We understand that it is a coming of age ceremony and a big deal. There is no way he can go (it is in India) and the invitor knows that and certainly understands. However, my DH needs to know what he needs to do, now that he has been invited. I assume he should send a gift? If so, is there a traditional type of gift? The son is 13.

Any help that anyone can give me would be greatly appreciated.

[jmarie]

I had never heard of this before, of course, I don't have any Indian acquaintances...so I googled it and although there are no gifts listed here, I thought it an interesting read and as a side note thought I would share it...hope you don't mind.

This ceremony is essential to the members of the three higher classes and marks a boy's official acceptance into his varna. At this point he becomes "twice-born." Everyone has a first, biological birth, but when a young man seeks his spiritual identity he symbolically accepts a spiritual teacher as father and the Vedas as mother. He may also receive a new, spiritual name. At the ceremony, he receives the jenoi (sacred-thread), usually worn for his entire lifetime. It is replaced at intervals, but never removed until the new one has been put on. There is a separate samskara marking the beginning of education, but today the two ceremonies are often combined.

Upanayana means "sitting close by," referring to the boy's taking shelter of the guru (spiritual teacher). Traditionally, he would move away from home to the teacher's ashram, called "gurukula." Even members of the royal family were trained to live simply without luxury or sense-gratification, in order to keep their minds pure and unspoiled. When later married, they would remain attached to the spiritual values they imbibed during their school days. The emphasis at gurukula was on the study of the Vedas and development of character.

The Ceremony

The upanayana ceremony is very old, dating back to at least the time of Krishna. This painting shows Krishna and his brother Balarama at gurukula (the school of their spiritual teacher).
The ceremony itself involves shaving the head, bathing and wearing new clothes. The boy may also beg alms from his mother and from other relatives. There is a havan and the investiture of the sacred thread, which hangs over his left shoulder. The boy will then hear the Gayatri mantra from his priest or guru, who may give him a spiritual name to signify his "second birth". Thereafter, wrapping the thread round the thumb of his right hand, he will chant this prayer thrice daily, at dawn, noon, and dusk. The boy takes vows to study the Vedas, serve his teachers and follow certain vows, including celibacy. He often concludes the ceremony by offering the traditional dakshina (gift) to his teacher.

Glossary Terms
Dvija – "twice born," referring to full members of the three upper varnas. It also refers to birds and teeth.
Jenoi – a modern word for the sacred thread (it rhymes with "annoy').
Related Values and Issues
The purposes of education
Delaying gratification (austerity)
Celibacy
Initiation for Girls
Traditionally this ceremony was open only to boys. With changing attitudes, some groups now initiate girls, although girls usually do not receive the sacred thread.

[MNGirlTX]

Interesting information you found, Joyce!

I work with a girl who is Indian. If you don't have a response re: gifts by morning, I'll ask her.

(But, knowing the people here, you'll have many more responses before then!)

Lori

[AdGirl]

that's nice that they're doing this. but the poor kid's going to come back with a shaved head. good thing it's a kind of "in" thing to do these days (shaving heads, that is :p )

a gift would certainly be appropriate, but not necessary. if you choose to give a gift, i'd just go with money or a gift certificate.

by the way, to give it a cool indian touch, if you end up giving money make sure you give it in an amount that ends in 1. in other words, if you were going to give $50, give $51 instead. i'm not really sure what the derivation of that tradition is, but you'll never find someone giving money in an amount ending in 0. just another oddball indian tradition i guess :)

[MNGirlTX]

My co-worker's BF also said that a gift is not necessary. Mostly, close family members give money or gold jewelry (and I believe that Indian gold is at least 22k...). However, he also got books and CDs for his Upanayanam. He provided this link for ideas of books and CDs. http://www.ahobilamutt.org/bookorders/bkorder01.asp