? about out of state party

[Loremma]

I've invited friends and family (select few) to Las Vegas to celebrate my birthday in November for the weekend. Am I expected to pay for everything? I'd like to go see a show, too. Is it too much to ask them to pay for their tickets, hotel, food and gas to get there? How do you go about asking them to pay for their own entertainment when I've invited them?

There will probably be 9 of us.
TIA

[PAMMELA]

If I were one of your friends invited I would not expect you to be paying for me, but that's just me. I think if you put the information in about a hotel, etc. when you invited them, they would assume that they are making their own arrangements (again, that's just how I would read it). Do the invitees need to fly in or are they in SoCal where they can drive? Or when you say tickets, do you mean show tickets or airfare tickets? and if you mean air, are you going to be paying to see the show tickets? If so then you can also put that it, then it would be clear what you're paying and what you're not. Do they "think" you're paying for everything?

[leightx]

I guess it might depend on how you worded the invitation. If it was along the lines of "Hey - I'm going to Vegas to celebrate my birthday, and I'd love to have you along," then that would seem clear that they'd need to pay their own way. In my group of friends, no one would ever presume that some one was essentially paying for their entire vacation, but maybe it's different for you??

[AzAnne]

I guess it might depend on how you worded the invitation. If it was along the lines of "Hey - I'm going to Vegas to celebrate my birthday, and I'd love to have you along,"

I agree. For me it would be all in the wording.

As an invitee "I'd love it if you could be there" would imply to me that I'm paying

[Loremma]

Last year my niece turned 21 and invited me (and others) to join her in Vegas and we all paid for ourselves. So this year I said, "I liked going to Vegas last year, let's do it this year for my birthday" and everyone was on board with a "count me in" response. But we didn't do a show last year so I was more worried about that.

And we'd all drive from So. Cal, unless someone wanted to fly themselves.

We'd probably have 4 in a room and split it, but I was wondering what the consensus was on that. It seems (so far) that everyone on this board would expect to pay their own way.

I just don't want to seem out of line with expecting everyone to pay their own way.

[aggie94]

I'm in agreement with the others, in that I'd never presume an invitation like this means someone else would be paying for my trip. If these are close friends and family (and I'd think they would be, if you want to celebrate your b-day in Vegas with them!), I'm thinking you can easily communicate this to them to be clear, i.e. I'll be making reservations at __________ hotel, and with 4 people to each room, it'll come to $____ a piece.

As for the show, you could send an email to those you have said, "Count me in" and simply say:

I'd love to take in a show while we're in Vegas. I'm thinking the Cirque du Soleil show, Ka, on Friday night at 8:00. Tickets are $50 each. If you're interested, let me know as soon as possible so we can try to get seats together.

Or something like that. :)

I have a couple of girlfriends who are planning spa vacations for upcoming milestone birthdays, and I certainly do not expect any of them to be paying my way. I can't imagine anyone would, but then again, I've been surprised before. :rolleyes:

[TKay]

If I were invited to a party out of state, I would absolutely expect to pay my own way. In fact, I'd wonder if other people should pay for YOU. I realize you're the one who did the planning, but I'd think everyone might chip in and buy you your big dinner or night out. But that's just me. I guess as an invitee, I'd want that to be my idea, not the birthday girl's.
I think if you mention the show and see if people are interested (as stated above), you'll be covered.
Happy birthday!