How to deal with unhealthy eating family members?

[SusanT]

My DH and I will be spending several days in a cabin with his parents, who are lovely people but they 1) show up with every snack food known to man in huge Costco size quantities and 2) eat a very unhealthy diet (a lot of meals without any vegetables at all).

I can just make lots of vegetables to go with any side of animal that they cook but is there any tactful way of asking them not to bring so much snack food? Should I just tell them I'm on a strict diet?

My husband's family has a family history of early heart disease (father had bypass at 35, grandfather dead at 33) so I'm vigilant about what he eats.

P.S. I've tried giving them gift subscriptions to CL and some CL cookbooks but I don't think they've ever used them. All my attempts at reformation have failed!

Thanks for any advice!

[funnybone]

Unfortunately, THEY have to be the ones to decide the want to change their eating habits. You cannot make them change. I would just bite my tongue (which I do on many occasions with my inlaws) and just not eat their junk. I would hope that they would eventually see that not everyone likes their food.

[RunnerKim]

It is so difficult to eat healthy when you're out of your own environment. I'm just back from visiting my parents - I never eat potato chips, never even want them anymore, but there thay are and munch munch.

I try to make sure I always have healthy food options - so make sure to take plenty of grapes, baby carrots, pretzels etc. so that you (your husband) can at least choose a healther option. For a couple of days I wouldn't stress overly about how much damage can be done - instead I'd try to focus on being active while you're there. Make sure you go for a good hike or something and that'll help with the damage control. It doesn't sound like they'd be receptive to limiting their junk food. Maybe you could offer to cook the meals while you're there (or at least half of them).

Kim

[Wendy w]

I agree with everything said here. At least you are familiar with their bad eating habits so you can plan accordingly with veggies and healthy snacks. It sounds like your DH is fortunate to have you looking out for him. Good luck!

[JulieM]

My DH has the nickname "Cookie Monster" because he's know for getting up in the night and eating whatever snack he can find, usually cookies. When his daughter was in high school, she'd make cookies or brownies for a school function and would have to hide them under her bed so her Dad wouldn't eat them! He claims he can't help himself, like sleepwalking. The point is, when his Mom and Dad visit, they like having cookies or something sweet like that after dinner, so I always make his Mom take the goodies into her bedroom at night so my DH can't pig out on them!

So SusanT, if the unhealthy snacks do not need refrigeration, and they are hard to resist by your DH, you might ask them to keep the snacks in their room so neither of you will be tempted. Tell them it's doctor's orders! That wouldn't be a lie, because with that history of heart disease, any doctor would tell him that.

[LGBurns]

I agree that your best options (IMHO) are to try to avoid eating their food, and if you do succumb, counteract it with some good hikes or swimming (if you're by a lake). I don't think that a few days of of bad eating would destroy a regular lifestyle of healthy eating, so don't sweat it. As to changing your in-laws eating habits--sometimes you gotta pick your battles and this one usually ain't worth it. Just know that you and your husband are caring for yourselves and hope that your example will rub off (but don't count on it). ;)

[Vanessa]

Because they are bringing the munchies I would not tell them about healthy eating etc. After all you are spending a few days together and why get into a discussion. Older people like to have little meals throughout the day or munchies. You and your DH can keep your healthy eating by not going into the cookie jar or eating your in laws munchies. Personally a few chips or cookies won't do that much harm. If you want you can take some healthy snacks to share, keep plenty of fruits, granola etc around.

[SQ]

If it's true that you're on a strict diet and their junk food will be too tempting, I think you should tell them. Hopefully you can do it without offending them. If it's not true, I think you shouldn't say anything but just try to eat your normal, healthy way. I also liked someone's suggestion of offering to cook some nights.

[SusanT]

My DH and I have talked about healthy eating with his folks on many occassions but to little avail. Both our fathers are on cholesterol lowering medications which they seem to think gives them a free ticket to eat whatever they want. It's so frustrating!

Julie - thanks for the suggestion of them keeping the stuff in their room (it's usually things like cheese wiz and 5 pound bags of triscuits). If snacks are out DH will fall back into his old habits and eat them almost without even thinking about it. (He lost - not gained- 15 pounds when he left home for college) I can resist but I feel like I'm scorning them somehow if I don't dig in.

I'll be sure to bring lots of our types of snack food and who knows maybe they'll see the light this time!

[m4star]

Just lead by example. You can not change your inlaws, but you can be in control of what goes into your mouth. Just because they have bad eating habits, it does not make it "OK" for everyone else to join in.

I have a very similar challenge with my inlaws. The whole family eats terribly. Boiled peas with margarine and butter is the closest thing to a vegetable you'll ever see on their table. When I was first married I would try and change them; spending all this time and effort making healthy dishes to accompany their meat, starches, or candy but it just wasn't appreciated. My lovely salads and veggies would just sit there being enjoyed by only DH and myself.

So my point is, just eat right and get lots of exercises. I've found that once I begin to indulge in the myriad of sweets at my inlaws, it's all downhill from there. So I don't even start in on them. And as for DH, have a good talk with him before you go. He is a grown adult and can make his own food choices, however let him know that you are concerned with his health and that you love him and want to spend many wonderful years by his side.

[JulieM]

Originally posted by m4star


So my point is, just eat right and get lots of exercises. I've found that once I begin to indulge in the myriad of sweets at my inlaws, it's all downhill from there. So I don't even start in on them.

EXCELLENT ADVICE!