Fall 2009 preschooler/pre-K thread

[DanaSD]

Anyone want to join in again? I made it broad including preschoolers and preK and for fall (can I even call this weather fall since its over 100??). Maybe Back to School would have been better.

anyway, here goes with an intro since its been awhile...

me, 38
DH, 38
DS, Brendan 3 1/2

We started back to preschool at the beginning of August and a week later got a call that we got into another school that we were wait listed on - we decided to make the switch because for the long term I prefer the new school. Both are montessori but the new one has full class sizes all the way through 8th grade (our other school is down to about 5 kids for the jr high class) and also become charter starting with K (free!). Adjusting has been a little tough - for now its a longer commute and Brendan hasn't made any close friends yet but over all he transitioned well since the program is similar.

Overall things are good. We've been having a few more battles lately but I think some is due to changing schools. We also go through a morning grumpyness where no matter we say in response to his questions he has a fit. Once we get through this everything is great. This morning this lasted longer than usual so it was a very trying morning.

A new challenge is car sickness? anyone else dealing with this. Once I realized this I"ve tried to keep him looking out the window and opening the window when he needs it but this isn't good since we have a long drive to school.

Besides Lisa, anyone else still hanging out with the "1 is perfect for me" philosophy?

[KathrynY]

I'll join in! It's been a while since I've posted over here:

Me: Kathryn, 42
DH: Also 42
DS: Henry, almost 3 1/2 (April birthday)

Henry started preschool just 2x week last week. So far so good - he's a happy, exhausted, dirty mess at the end of the day. :D Due to our work schedules, we went with a preschool that offers before and after-care which means he can be in the same place all day. On alternate days he goes back to the home daycare he's been attending since he was 5 months old. We want to keep him there at least part time because it's in our school district and he can go there before and after school once he's in Kindergarten, so the consistency is important.

I'm having to adjust to two different care/school environments, and pack extras of everything for two places plus home. I think we must own over $200 worth of sunscreen and bug spray right now! :o We've been to preschool twice so far and are already missing (although clearly labelled) one sippy cup and one water bottle. :rolleyes: I am holding out hope that they will turn up eventually, otherwise this could be more expensive than I thought.

No real issues at the moment, other than testing us with inappropriate language. Time outs aren't working for us right now, but taking away bedtime stories works (although it feels awful because we enjoy that so much too).

Dana, sorry to hear about the car sickness. :( I'm with you and Lisa in the "1 child is perfect for us" camp. We are finished and have given away all of our infant/toddler stuff!

[DanaSD]

thanks for joining in - most of us have been away for awhile so hopefully everyone will pop back in.

Timeouts stopped working for us too. We either send him to his room, put toys in timeout or he loses tv time.

[LaraW]

Hi All, I will join in too :)

Me: Lara, 36 (for a little longer, anyway ;))
DH: 39
DD: Natalie, 5 1/2
DS: Colin, 3 1/2

We are doing well, and have had a nice summer. Natalie started Kindergarten this year, so that has been a bit of an adjustment for us, to have to get her up and out the door every day. She is doing full-day K, so she goes 7:45 - 2:30 M, T, Th, F and goes 7:45 - 1:15 on Weds. Today was actually the first day of school this week because they were doing assessment testing Monday and Tuesday this week. This is the 3rd week of school, and so far she is loving it. She rides the bus and can get herself to her classroom. She is buying her lunch a few days a week too. So far, so good :)

Colin started back to pre-school as well. He is going to daycare 2 full days/week and is going to the pre-school where he continues to get speech therapy 2 days. Those days are only 2 1/2 hours long, so its not a big thing.

We are looking at a possible change in our schedule in the next few weeks if I get a job I have been interviewing for. One thing I am kind of bummed about is probably having to give up storytime at the library. I have taken the kids to story time since Natalie was a baby, and I just love the programs they have :( We may have an opportunity on Tuesday mornings, but it goes 10:30 - 11, and I have to have him to school at 11:30, and he needs to eat lunch in there too so it may not work out. I know they do some Saturday storytimes too, so its not like he won't get it at all but I am still a little bummed.

We have not done time-outs in a long time here. I have found that just sending them to their rooms is a lot more effective for both of us. Colin is actually much better behaved than Natalie, and I usually only have to give him a verbal warning, and he is fine (he usually doesn't even need that).

Anyhow, that is it for us. Even though I have 2 kids, I am definitely in the camp of "we are done" ;) I have an 8 month old nephew and a 7 month old niece, so I still get plenty of baby fix without actually having to have a baby ;)

One thing I am interested in talking about, if anyone else is, is chores. Dana and Kathryn, your kids might be too young to do much and I am thinking more for Natalie. Right now, they both can strip their beds and bring me their laundry bags (they both have a removable bag in their hamper), they put away their clean laundry and clear their plates from the table sometimes. They also, obviously, put away their toys. What I would like is to start a setting the table/clearing the table calendar where one sets and the other clears and they alternate days or whatever.

[DanaSD]

I've been thinking about chores too mostly because we don't have him do that much and I think its time to add in more. He puts away toys and clears his plates. We've started having him help with collecting trash from all the cans throughout the house but he needs help with this. I've started to teach him to put away his clothes but it takes him a long time to put clothes on the hanger so he gets bored before he's finished.

Lara - I'm impressed that Colin puts away his laundry, brings you his laundry and can strip the bed. With the first Brendan gets bored and stops and I'm not sure if physically he can do the other 2 - I'll have to give it a try.

[LaraW]

Dana, I don't think Colin has any hanging clothes, so its really just putting them in his dresser. He seems to like it though. He sometimes needs a little help getting the fitted sheet "started" but he can pull the top sheet off by himself.

I do have the kids bring me the trashcans from around the house if I think about it, and I"m not in too much of a hurry. Part of it is that I just do a lot of stuff myself because it can take an excruciatingly long amount of time for them to do it. :rolleyes:

The thing we are struggling with right now is that he seems to want help with everything, things that he can do himself. Getting dressed, going potty are the 2 big ones. I don't give in, and make him do it himself, but that has led to a lot of whining, etc. It is really tiring.

[DanaSD]

He doesn't have a dresser. Hadn't thought about the impact on him doing his chores. His room has a huge walk in closet and I placed an order for a dresser that matched his furniture but since it was $900 and we didn't need it I cancelled the order. I did buy a small draw thing for socks, underware and pjs. For now, I think I'll just work on having him putting the things that go in drawers.

[cchhbb]

Dana,

My boys put away their laundry and have for quite some time. All their clothes are hung with the exception on pj's, socks and underwear. The boys have to carry their folded things upstairs and put them away in the appropriate locations. I put their clothes on hangers when I take them out of the laundry and then they take them upstairs and put them on the rod.

Cheryl

[SooCookie]

I guess my DD will officially qualify as a preschooler as of September 8th, so I will join!

Me - Michelle, 31
DH - 33
DD - Kayla, 3 (5/31/06)
DS - Benjamin, 1

I can't believe my baby girl will start preschool next week! We had her orientation today, and she did not do so well, so I am trying to brace myself for the inevitable tears next Tuesday. Who knows, she could surprise me, right?!

We are having issues with sassy back talk and like all of you, time outs aren't the answer (they never really have been, actually). We take away privileges as well such as books at bedtime, chocolate milk, or her beloved cars! That works much better for us.

As far as chores, Kayla feeds the dog and cleans up her toys, but that is it. It seems like I should be trying to do a bit more. I never thought about having her put her laundry away, so I will have to give that a try. Thanks, Lara.

Can I ask about naps? It seems like your kids are a bit older than Kayla, but are they still napping? Kayla sometimes doesn't (which is fine, she still has quiet time in her room) but when she does, it really messes up bedtime. I never let her sleep past 3pm, but she still will be up until 10, even if she only nappped for 1/2 hour. Does this mean it is time to give up the nap? If so, how can I still make sure she has her quiet time (read: Mommy's alone time) but not fall asleep?

Looking forward to chatting with you guys! Thanks for starting the thread, Dana.

[LaraW]

Michelle, hopefully Kayla will do fine with being dropped off at school. The teachers probably expect it to some degree. Colin's pre-school has an activity set up when the kids get there, so they have something specific to do after they get their backpacks set up. That way they are too busy to be upset ;) I would just kiss her goodbye and tell her you will be back and save your own tears for once your back is turned :o

We ran into the same problem with naps with both of my kids, and in order to preserve my sanity and get them to bed on time, I have had them stop napping. It has worked out OK for us, Natalie took a nap without the late bedtime thing until she was almost 4, but Colin was barely 3. I did enforce the quiet time thing for Natalie for a while because Colin was still napping. She was free to play in her room, read, etc. I only made her stay in her room for an hour, and we have a clock on a ledge that she can see from her room, so I would just say "when the big hand gets to the ___ you can come down" and that seemed to work OK. Another idea is to set a timer.

[MinEaston]

Can I jump in?

DD (Anna) is 4 1/2 and just started Pre-Kindergarten this past Monday morning. It's a half-day program, and so far, she LOVES it. She told me Monday she wanted to stay all day. She gets on a bus a half-block away, and then another bus takes her back to the daycare she's been attending since she was 3 months old. On Monday she happily got on the bus, and I cried on the way back to the house :o

Anna still naps probably 50% of the time. At daycare they darken the room for a couple of hours so she really doesn't have a choice. She goes to bed between 8 & 9, and we don't have to get her up until 7:30 (she usually is awake before then). If we had to get up earlier I'm sure we'd have issues w/naps interfering with bedtimes. When she doesn't nap we do insist on quiet time, and can usually get about 45 minutes before she wanders out looking for us.

With the imminent arrival of DC #2 (due Sunday, and I stayed home today because I don't feel "right"), I'm sure everything will change!

[mst]

Hi everyone-

I am more of a lurker these days, but so glad to see you all!

Michelle- Ilyssa stopped napping years ago. It was very sad. Shayna, who is 16 months has been trying to give up napping. At most, I get 45 minutes from her. It sounds like Kayla is ready to give it up. I would also suggest quiet time. With Ilyssa, it is often TV on the couch. Not my favorite, but it gives her time to just chill. As for the drop-off, Ilyssa still cries. Just hang in there.

Chores. Ilyssa helps clean-up her toys, and brings over her plate from dinner. I like the idea of laundry, but since I still put away my husband's, that might be tough.:o

Mariana-so excited for you! Can't wait to hear your good news!

Now for my TMI question- are any of your kids 100% independent in the potty? I am still wiping poops, and wondering when I can stop...

[KathrynY]

I am glad to see the topic of chores, because I keep thinking we should be working on adding things and the new ideas are so helpful! Henry likes to "help" with the laundry - I have him help me sort the dirty clothes by handing him an item and telling him to either toss it in the green basket (darks) or white basket (lights). He likes the tossing part. :) I will get wet laundry out of the washer and put it into a basket, and he loves to take it out of the basket and put it into the dryer. He especially loves to empty the dryer lint trap. :p He also helps sort the clean laundry into baskets for folding, and can tell my clothes from DH's clothes and his own, for the most part.

Still in diapers here, and it will probably be a while yet. He knows what to do, just isn't interested in being independent. Thankfully the new preschool is supportive and doesn't require 3-year-olds to be potty trained!

Michelle, I wish I had something thoughtful to add about naps, but we seem to have lucked out with a dedicated napper. I do like the idea of quiet/rest time after lunch even after the naps are gone - wish we adults could get away with that. I know plenty of people who, like Lara, ended up doing away with nap time when their children were 3-4 in order to preserve a reasonable bedtime.

Mariana, thinking about you and your soon-to-be new arrival! I am having a hard time imagining the day that I will put my small child on a bus - glad to hear Anna is having fun.

Lara, when do you find out about the job? Fingers crossed for you.

[Couperine]

I lurk too much lately since it's rare that all the planets align and the kids are all happily asleep or otherwise content; however, for mst, when Ethan started preschool last fall, his teachers would not wipe for him. They showed him how to wrap his hand with paper and do it - he just stopped asking for help after about a week of this at school. He's always been rather independent once he realizes he can do something himself though.

As for chores that 3-4 year olds can do, Ethan loves putting up the utensils from the dishwasher, we've recently moved on to him handing me the high cabinet items while he puts away lower cabinet dishes. He can clear and set the table with guidance, he loves to dust, he puts away all of his clothes, sorts his clothes into the right baskets, waters plants, feeds the dog and cat, hm there is likely more chore-like things he can do, but he's an amazingly helpful child, and we're currently working on integrating more meal-prep assistance and teeth-brushing independence. I read a suggestion from a dentist that you brush and floss their teeth at night, and they use an electric toothbrush and do it themselves in the morning. It's working well enough so far.

My time is up - time to feed the baby!

[Bawstinn]

Maria: 39 (at least for a couple more weeks :eek: )
David: 38
Madeleine: 3
Chrstopher: 3 months

Madeleine was moved to the preschool room at daycare when she turned 3 in June. The timing was unfortunate as Christopher arrived at the same time, so her little world was all upside down. Things are a lot better now with dropping off. Especially since I am back at work and she knows I am not at home all day.

Wiping: She likes to think she can do it herself but she can't.

As far as chores go, she has always wanted to help with everything so she has been given little things here and there to do. At daycare they are responsible for clearing their own plates and cups at meals. She is responsible for putting the dog in the basement when we leave the house w/ a treat. She helps daddy water the plants. She helps with setting the table and clearing. Loves to help me cook <sigh>. She also apparently watches me do the laundry as more than once she has thrown her clothes in and started the washer (front loader).

We had a little blip with naps last month but this month we are back on track. They nap every day at daycare and they say she is back to sleeping 2 hours. Today she napped from 1:30-4.

Our challenge is mornings. She goes to bed at 7:30 and gets up at 6:30. She is a BEAR in the morning and it is such a struggle to get her up and dressed and out of the house. With our work schedule, daycare pick-up, supper and bath time (a necessity every night) it isn't feasible to get her to bed any earlier.

[gertdog]

So glad to see this thread back- I have missed it!

Me: Stephanie, 37 (for a few more weeks!)
DH: Jason, 36
DS1: Ryan, almost 4
DS2: Aiden, 7 months

Ryan will be 4 next month! Such a big kid all of a sudden.

We are having his first-ever birthday party to which we invite his friends. Hope I can pull it off- if the weather is bad I may have a nervous breakdown as our house is too small for so many people. Ryan wants a Max and Ruby theme. Of course Max and Ruby aren't licensed so themed invitations, party goods etc. aren't available. Ugh. I'm going to just wing it and get a Max and Ruby cake made, buy party goods in colors that go with the characters, and make a few decorations using color copies from his books, and hope that works for Ryan.

After 3 1/2 years at our daycare/preschool, we are making a change. When we decided I would stay home with the baby, we changed Ryan to a part-time schedule and he attended their preschool class 4 days per week, with a fantastic teacher. So we planned to keep him there another year despite it being a real financial stretch for us. BUT the teacher abruptly left for a new job, and we decided to look at other options. We found a cooperative preschool that we love- the teachers have all been there 15 years+ and are state-certified, the school is parent-owned and operated, and it's been operating for over 50 years. And there are NO worksheets/phonics/flashcards, which makes me very happy. And there is one adult in the classroom for every 5 children. It also costs just half of what we are paying now, and he'll go 5 mornings per week. Ryan will start next week. He has met the teacher and visited the classroom, and loved both, but feels very anxious/sad about leaving the old school and his friends. There have been some tantrums and the first EVER incident of him hitting a friend at school. Ugh. We are trying to convey that it's okay to feel sad, worried AND excited about the changes. I think he'll do fine after the first week or so. I hope.

Staying home has been both satisfying and challenging. By the end of the day I'm pretty beat. I joined a local MOMs group and have really enjoyed meeting other parents and getting out of the house for playdates and the occasional moms' night out. I am hoping that with the new preschool routine, we can get into a good rhythm/routine at home too. Aiden has been a rotten sleeper so far, and I think it's in part due to temperament, and in part due to us not putting enough emphasis on routine for him. With Ryan it was easy to schedule everything around his sleep needs. Not so easy when you have to schedule around your preschooler!

Count me in the "retired from childbearing" camp. We always knew/hoped it would be two for us, and now I am DONE! :)

Chores- in the morning Ryan is to make his bed (e.g. pull the comforter up over the sheet). At dinner he sets the table, and at bedtime he lays out his clothes for the next day. Otherwise I ask him to help me if I happen to be doing something like folding laundry, emptying the dishwasher, or dusting (he loves to dust and sweep). I feel like having one or two specific things to do in the morning and evening works for him for now- easy to remember and incorporate into our routine.

Okay- I am being given the chance to go take a LOOOONG hot shower while DH entertains the boys and I'd be crazy not to take it- hope to be back later with more personals. :D

[DanaSD]

So is anyone else still have their kid in pullups at night? Brendan stopped wearing diapers around 2 1/2 (his school's way of potting training) and hasn't had a daytime accident in forever. We had issues with pooping (he was afraid) but got over that awhile ago. But he still needs a pullup and I just don't know how we'll ever get past that. We've tried several times to just stop using and had some good days but accidents on others. My husband would even wake him up in the middle of the night.

[LaraW]

Colin has been out of pullups at night for a while, maybe 4-6 weeks, but he was dry for a long time before that. Natalie on the other hand, she is wet. every. night. She is a very deep sleeper. I am not concerned yet, though I will mention it to the doctor the next time we are there. Colin is a much lighter sleeper, and will get up in the night to go potty but Natalie just doesn't feel the urge to go.

[mst]

Nancy- thanks for the advice- I now have a child who wipes herself. Yay!

Steph- Ilyssa was crazy early with nighttime dryness. She did that at the same time she potty-trained (less than 3). I don't think I know any other local kids who are this age and dry enough at night to wear underwear. She really did it on her own- was consistently dry or waking us to go potty. I think it is more developmental than behavioral (meaning, I think their bodies have to be ready for it).

[Bawstinn]

Madeleine was fully potty trained at 27 months but was consistently waking up dry in the morning (maybe 2x a month she'd be wet) shortly before she turned 2 (which is why I had started potty training). I kept her in diapers for quite a while at night for fear of an accident.

One night she announced she wasn't a baby and didn't want to wear diapers at night anymore. I reluctantly went with it and she has been fine. She has woken up maybe 3 times to go to the bathroom. She does fine at daycare but maybe has an accident at home every couple of weeks because she waits too long to go.

[Couperine]

We went cold turkey on diapers, day and night. I have 4 sets of waterproof pad and sheet on the bed with 2-3 emergency blankets, so when an accident happens, I just peel everything off quickly and get him back to bed asap. He's 4 and still has an accident at night every few months when people give him entirely too much to drink; when we first started out, we'd wake him up before we went to bed to do a nighttime break. That helped a lot.

[buffygirl]

Hi everyone,

It is so great hearing about the kiddos. It seems like just yesterday when we were all fretting about sleep, breast feeding and just getting by!

Rex is 4 and is doing well. He is in Pre-K 3 days a week and he stays home with grandmas 2 days a week. It is a good balance. He is learning to write his name which is really cute. Stephanie, I hear ya on the work sheets!

Dana, we are permanently in the one kid camp. I turn 43 next week and cannot imagine starting over. But we really knew that one was our hope and we felt really blessed to finally get him! Thanks for starting the thread!

Kim

[MinEaston]

With the imminent arrival of DC #2 (due Sunday, and I stayed home today because I don't feel "right"), I'm sure everything will change!

As you all may have noticed, Nicholas arrived at breakneck speed early morning Sep 5. We've been adjusting to being a family of four.

Anna absolutely dotes on her brother. She's obviously struggling with the attention being divided, and DH and I are both trying so hard not to lose our patience. Almost everything we tell her to do that she's not happy about results in stomping, no, I don't WANT to, or something similar. We do a lot of counting to 3 these days :o. We have kept Anna's routines fairly consistent despite the baby - for example, same morning and bedtime routines.

Any suggestions on how to make this easier on Anna?

[mst]

Kim- great to get an update on Rex.

Mariana- that is the million dollar question, my friend. Just stay patient, and give her extra love. It never hurts to yell once in a while when the baby is crying, "Nicholas- I am helping Anna right now. It will be your turn next." (Or whatever thing you often say to her.) Maybe a special treat for ice cream for big girls- you know that babies can't eat ice cream, right?;)