How Many Months to Conceive? [Archive] - CookingLight.com Community

Meg O'C

09-09-2002, 04:54 PM

Oops! I think you are right, Val! As we enter our fifth cycle of "trying" and my disappointment grows, I only thought about those actually trying, not the happy accidents! Hopefully none of my in-laws are reading this board. The longer we try the more open I am to discuss this with my girlfriends but my MIL has a track record of being a little too curious about this (she asked my one SIL every week for 10 months, "are you pregnant yet?"). That's why I was trying to keep our attempts quiet but I am getting antsy and wanted to do a little "benchmarking."

erinl

09-09-2002, 04:59 PM

It took us about 6 months. The month that it finally "took", I had started charting my temperature. It helped me feel a little more in control. Of course, it was also the first month that I wasn't traveling for work, closing on a house or doing some other stressful activity. Good luck, Meg!

valchemist

09-09-2002, 05:16 PM

hi meg,

oh well. I couldn't vote, but I can still contribute!

I hope you don't have any lurking in-laws. I doubt it though. isn't it nice to come to a place like this where you are kind of anonymous but at the same time you feel like you are chatting with your girlfriends?

good luck with this -- and have fun! :p good thing it isn't a chore.

val

ChristineLiu

09-09-2002, 05:51 PM

Originally posted by Meg O'C
As we enter our fifth cycle of "trying" and my disappointment grows, I only thought about those actually trying, not the happy accidents! Hopefully none of my in-laws are reading this board. The longer we try the more open I am to discuss this with my girlfriends but my MIL has a track record of being a little too curious about this (she asked my one SIL every week for 10 months, "are you pregnant yet?"). That's why I was trying to keep our attempts quiet but I am getting antsy and wanted to do a little "benchmarking."

Well, at least you don't have a mother asking you if YOUR SISTER-IN-LAW is pregnant! :) How am I supposed to know???

I am not qualified to vote either, but I know enough people trying. I have a friend who was like you and kept on trying and kept getting nada. So they finally gave up and voila! Pregnant with a cute little girl. i think it's the pressure of succeeding that makes it hard. So, relax and stop "trying." and to quote Nike, "Just do it" and stop thinking about trying to hit the jackpot.;)

BosunsWife

09-09-2002, 05:56 PM

Three months of trying for our first at age 36 (37 when delivered) and two months of trying for our second at age 39 (40 when delivered).

My inlaws were annoying also. From the time my MIL found out we were trying (big mistake telling), she asked me monthly.

Same thing happened the second time. I fixed them, though, I delayed telling them when we actually found out we were LOL!

My mom knew better than to keep asking.

karen w

09-09-2002, 05:56 PM

I voted 1-3 months for the first child. I conceived the first month we started trying. I am very irregular, so DH and I had concerns about how successful we would be, but fortunately, I can feel when I ovulate. I get "mittleshmertz" (? spelling) pain. So when I felt it, I said to him, "now dear." Voila! It worked!! My second one took 2 months to conceive, and number three took 5 months. Good luck, and just remember, some things are worth the wait!! But most importantly, have fun trying(tee hee!!).

Karen

Molli526

09-09-2002, 05:58 PM

Meg-

How timely that you asked this question. I was wondering the same thing. I realize there are external factors ( moving, new jobs, happy accidents :), etc. ) but I figure in the end they all sort of cancel each other out. DH aren't at the point of trying yet, but I guess I wanted to see how long it took other people so I could be prepared if it didn't happen within the first few months.

krispy spo

09-09-2002, 06:28 PM

We were lucky with both of our kids - it just took "one time". By one time I mean that we tried just about every night for about a week during that elusive window of opportunity. DH was actually feeling like it was a chore towards the end!! I was very thankful becausse the average conception time is something like 6 months I think, and I am not a patient person.

boisewinesnob

09-09-2002, 06:39 PM

I voted 1-3 but I really meant more like "every time DH looked at me I got pregnant" :rolleyes: . Like Val's Julia, my boys were very happy surprises, and actually the last one was the only one planned.
:)

Suzy

09-09-2002, 06:41 PM

i was age 23, and had only been on bcp for 3 months or so. my dr said it would probably take less than 3 cycles to get pregnant. the first time around, we were scared; the second time, we were a little too anxious to get pg; the third time was a charm. i think part of the reason it was so "easy" was because of my age, too.
marisa :)

beacooker

09-09-2002, 06:55 PM

I wanted to have a baby born in the spring or early summer, which would mean I would need to get pg in early-late summer. I told DH we needed to have some 'practice runs' before then, because I figured it would take me a while to get pg. Well, oops, we got pg the first try, and I ended up with a January baby. :eek:

lhall

09-10-2002, 06:14 AM

Well, the first time it took a week...:eek:

With baby number took it took about 6 months.

Leigh

penguin

09-10-2002, 06:39 AM

Thanks for posting this poll, Meg! DH & I are in our second month of trying, so I can't vote but I love hearing from the experienced crowd! I am keeping my fingers crossed that this is our month, but the anticipation is killing me. It is good to know there are other BB'ers out there going through the same thing. :)

You can PM me if you want to discuss :D

AnnaSue

09-10-2002, 07:33 AM

I just found out recently that I am pregnant and it took four months. I still can't quite believe it, but the morning sickness is starting to make it a little more real. I'm hoping that phase will pass quickly! I guess I'm so surprised because I had to have surgery twice last year for fibroids etc., so I was worried that I wouldn't be able to conceive. I was going to buy that Clearplan Easy monitor after reading a recent thread on it, but I guess I won't need it now! I know what you mean about not wanting in-laws to know Meg! My MIL is a big pain, so we didn't say a word to her until Sunday when DH told her the news. First thing she did was to demand that if its a girl that we name her after her!:eek: Looks like I have about 7 1/2 months to figure out how to deal with her in baby matters.:rolleyes:

LaraW

09-10-2002, 07:35 AM

I did not vote, but I do have a question...were any of you who conceived within 1-3 months on the pill for a long time? I was on the pill for about 9 years, and even though we have not started trying yet, we probably will be fairly soon (TMI? :D )

lhall

09-10-2002, 07:42 AM

I was on the pill for about 8 years before getting pregnant. What my Dr advised was to be off the pill for 3 months and on prenatal vitamins for 2 months before trying to get pregnant. I'd asked about getting pregnant at my annual exam and he gave me a prescription for prenatal vitamins that I held onto until we were ready.

I went back on the pill between pregnancies and followed the same procedure with baby number 2.

Leigh

beacooker

09-10-2002, 08:50 AM

I was on the pill for more years than I am willing to admit before I got pg. Like Leigh, I stopped 3 months before we started trying.

cchhbb

09-10-2002, 08:58 AM

I went off the pill in December after being on it for 18 years solid. DH and I got pregnant in February. I started prenatal vitamins right before I got pregnant. I was taking a multi vitamin before that. We didn't really try in December and January, but we weren't not trying. Like many, we were told that at my age (then 33) and with my history of endometriosis, it could take awhile so I was pleasantly suprised that we got pregnant so quickly. I tease that I had a full proof method. We went on vacation to New Orleans to celebrate our second anniversary and Valentine's day and ended up pregnant. It helped me to get DH's undivided attention. LOL.

Cheryl

RunnerKim

09-10-2002, 09:00 AM

I was on the pill for 5 yrs and got pregnant immediately after going off - hadn't even had a regular cycle yet. I took the home test just so I wouldn't keep saying "maybe." I'm 29 (almost 30 now) and due any day.

Kim

Barrie

09-10-2002, 10:04 AM

I was on the pill for 10+ years and went off it a week before our wedding. We got pregnant on our second try. The first try was on our honeymoon ;), and when we got back I bought an ovulation predictor kit (the kind with the stick that you pee on) from the drugstore and used that for month #2. That's when we conceived. I was shocked that it happened so soon given my age (I'll be 37 on Friday) and how long I had been on the pill. DH likes to say that he has strong swimmers. :p

ISAIAH30_18

09-10-2002, 10:21 AM

Thanks Meg for doing this poll....I couldn't vote since there was no "still trying"....but I was wondering the same thing.

I had been on the pill for about a year. Stopped taking them at the end of June. I've had 2 cycles since then and it will be another week before I can tell if "it took"... :) but I really don't feel like it did.

I'm trying not to worry about it and typically do well with it, but I have a friend who has been trying to get pg for 5 years so I'm a little nervous I think.....

Of course then there are the times that DH and I argue about something and I think "ooooo pllllleaaaaassseeeee not this month!" heehee....

but I am encouraged by all the 30-somethings having great success quickly!!!

Leslie w

09-10-2002, 10:30 AM

My menstrual cycles were always messed up and the doctor thinks half the time I wasn't ovulating so after trying for a year w/ no luck he started me on the fertility drug Clomid. I got pregnant 3 months later. The second baby took only a week! I conceived 5 months after having my first and I didn't need fertility drugs.

MrsReber

09-10-2002, 11:15 AM

It took us exactly one month. I came off the pill in July and was pregnant by the beginning of September. Our second one, I have no idea. We weren't trying!!! My first was only 5 months old. I guess DH and I are just extrememly fertile. I'm afraid to breathe the same air as him. Anyway, hang in there. It takes some people longer than others. 5 months is not that long to be trying. Good luck!!

Oh, and I have to chime in with a MIL story, of course. Before we were even trying and I was still on the pill, MIL made some comment about me not being pregnant yet. Then she told me that it must be DH and she was reading about herbs that can help him. I told her we weren't even trying and I was on the pill so it didn't surprise me at all that I wasn't pregnant! Then again, this is the woman who, when I was only dating DH, told me to get pregnant so DH would marry me.

Susan

MelissaAS

09-10-2002, 11:46 AM

I was on the pill for about 10 years, then came off the pill in March but continued using other methods until May. We got pregnant right away in May (on one of only two "occasions" I might add, if not TMI)- my mother warned me that "we're VERY fertile" but I didn't really believe her. My midwife said it might take up to a year so I was planning on at least a couple of months. Guess my mom was right after all :)!! BTW, I started prenatals back in December because my midwife thinks it's a good idea to be on them for a few months prior...now the countdown is to February 13th!!

Melissa

jjcokc

09-10-2002, 12:06 PM

I guess I'm about the only one here who actually has had infertility issues. I got pregnant after a year of trying the first time while on clomid, but had a miscarriage. The one month after the miscarriage got pregnant again, still on clomid with ds#1. Then after two yrs of trying and all sorts of infertility treatments, we finally did invitro and had b/g twins. My problem was one of ovulating prematurely. So if any one ever has questions about the meds involved or procedures, I think I have probably had just about everything, including lots of injections. However the results were well worth the hormonal mood swings and painful shots.

Julie

gertdog

09-10-2002, 12:45 PM

I have read these responses with interest. I am about to turn 31, and DH and I (married this summer) are probably still 1-2 years away from being ready to start our family. I am so worried that being over 30 will make it hard, that having been on the pill for years will make it hard, that having pretty irregular cycles before I was on the pill will make it hard, etc. This thread makes me feel a little better.

I have to ask what TMI means. :o

Barrie

09-10-2002, 12:49 PM

Originally posted by gertdog
I have to ask what TMI means. :o

Too much information. :p

ourthreegirls

09-10-2002, 12:54 PM

Originally posted by erinl
The month that it finally "took", I had started charting my temperature.

It was just the opposite for me. I went off the pill in Feb 98. Started charting around May. Got MORE and MORE anxious as each month went by (and thus unknowingly put a lot of pressure on dh :o ) So around late November I guess, I stopped charting thinking I was going to have to see a dr. when I hit the one year mark - and thus stopped getting so anxious every month. BAM! I got pg right away after I stopped charting. Go figure. Dh is convinced I was just putting too much stress on both of us.
You didn't ask about second kids, but thought I'd share anyway:D. Just call me fertile myrtle. Abby was 6 months old when I got pregnant (NO we weren't trying, but stopped preventing it that month). And guess what? TWINS! Huge surprise. I naively thought since it took so long with Abby that it wouldn't happen right away the second time around.....:eek:

Jennifer

Meg O'C

09-10-2002, 01:44 PM

Thanks for all the stories, ladies. I lurk on the Pregnancy and New Moms threads (you mean people lurk on those? - just kidding! I know I am not alone in lurking!) so I knew I would get some good responses to this thread.

I will be 31 in December. I started charting two months ago after two months of trying (thanks to some good info I read on this board about Toni Weschler's Taking Charge of Your Fertility) and have "self-diagnosed" myself as having a short luteal phase (since going off the pill I've been getting my period every 25 days with luteal phases of 9 and 7 days, which is odd to me because I was always like a clock with 28-day cycles before the pill and of course, for the three years I was on it). From what I read, this "problem" could correct itself the longer I am off the pill but having only been on it for 3 years and always being a regular 28 days for 15 years before that, I am just surprised I am not back to a more normal cycle by now. Anyway, based on the book, there are some pretty simple, non-invasive things that can be tried to correct this. I am scheduled to see the doctor on 9/25 to discuss. Hopefully they won't laugh me out of there and say, "Four months is nothing! Just relax and keep trying!" I had read that you don't really need to see a doctor until 12 months of trying unsuccessfully if under 30 and six months if over 30. I had a problem in the past with cysts on my right fallopian tube so I am anxious to take the next step and not have to wait longer to find out if there are problems.

Thanks again for everyone's stories . . . and for listening!;)

Abby

09-10-2002, 01:48 PM

We decided this past June to start trying and decided to just have fun with it and let nature take its course. We didn't buy any predictors kits or anything like that and thought that it would probably take a few months or so. Boy, was I surprised the first month when a big fat positive showed up on the home pregnancy test! Poor dh felt so cheated! :D We were expecting to hopefully have a May baby but will end up with a March baby because of beginner's luck! I got off of the pill about a year and a half ago just because I was sick of taking them. I have been taking prenatal vitamins for a while though. I've always been under the impression that women of child-bearing age should always take a supplement with folic acid whether you're trying or not - accidents do happen!

Good luck!!!

ISAIAH30_18

09-10-2002, 02:46 PM

ok...so I have a question that I bet all of you can answer.

I haven't started buying home pg tests yet, but I got to thinking this morning as I went to the bathroom for the UPTEENTH time.....

I know you are supposed to use your first urine of the morning on these things (and maybe it covers this in the instructions) but if I generally wake up every 2 hours (sometimes 4)to go, which one would I use? My usual wake up time is 630 am....prior to that I'm usually up at 4am to go.....I guess this is just one of those things that really has me stuck but doesn't seem like it should matter...

boisewinesnob

09-10-2002, 02:58 PM

Originally posted by MrsReber

Oh, and I have to chime in with a MIL story, of course.
Then again, this is the woman who, when I was only dating DH, told me to get pregnant so DH would marry me.

:eek: Susan Yikes!
I hope you don't let your daughter hang around her when she gets to be interested in boys ;) . Who knows what ideas she might put in her head :eek:.

On the bright side, at least it sounds like your MIL wanted to see you and DH married :) .

Kim, I think whichever time frame gives you the longest time between bathroom trips is the one to use for testing. They just want a higher concentration of the pregnancy hormone there for the most accurate result.

ISAIAH30_18

09-10-2002, 03:06 PM

Originally posted by boisewinesnob

Kim, I think whichever time frame gives you the longest time between bathroom trips is the one to use for testing. They just want a higher concentration of the pregnancy hormone there for the most accurate result.

AHHHHH...ok...maybe I can rest easy about THAT tonight! :) Thanks!

erinl

09-10-2002, 04:15 PM

just have fun with it and let nature take its course

That was how DH and I went into it, too. I was floored by how sad I got each month when I started my period.

beacooker

09-10-2002, 05:37 PM

Originally posted by ISAIAH30_18
I know you are supposed to use your first urine of the morning on these things (and maybe it covers this in the instructions) but if I generally wake up every 2 hours (sometimes 4)to go, which one would I use? My usual wake up time is 630 am....prior to that I'm usually up at 4am to go.....I guess this is just one of those things that really has me stuck but doesn't seem like it should matter...

With the newer pg tests out today, it doesn't matter which pee of the day you use. You can take the test as soon as you get home from the store with it, which is what I did. I guess the tests now can sense a lower level of the chemical/hormone/whatever.

simmerdown

09-10-2002, 07:31 PM

I am another one of those that could have voted "all hubby had to do was look at me and I would get pregnant" I consider myself very fortunate!! Neither one of our kids were planned..it was just the attitude of if it happens it happens. I had been taking the pill for about 9 years and I decided to go off of it. I have to add that my DH traveled alot so we didn't have as much "practice" as I would have liked (if ya know what I mean) there were actually times when he would be gone 3-4 weeks at a time. So I just decided not to take the pill anymore and voila!!! Of course right after I had my first child we did use condoms for a while and then there was the " I'm too tired from being with the baby" cycle of our relationship and then one day I said how about another baby..we practiced for a week or so and voila again!!
For those of you dealing with infertility issues..I have a dear friend that struggled years with it. She finally conceived after many attempts and she is now the proud parent of twins !! I saw the struggle and the heartache she went through. It is a difficult thing to deal with. I will say a prayer for all of you tonight!!

boisewinesnob

09-10-2002, 07:50 PM

Originally posted by beacooker
pee of the day

Hmmm....is that anything like soup of the day :eek: :eek: :D
Sorry! It just sounded funny :)

LaraW

09-11-2002, 12:34 PM

Originally posted by lhall
What my Dr advised was to be off the pill for 3 months and on prenatal vitamins for 2 months before trying to get pregnant.

I actually talked to my pharmacist about prenatal vitamins. He told me that I could take a folic acid supplement along with my regular vitamin. So, I've been doing that since going off the pill.

AmyJane

09-12-2002, 11:58 AM

DH and I got married on June 29 and decided we would try right away b/c I am 38. Well, little did we know that we would be blessed with a "honeymoon baby"! We probably conceived on our first or second try. I think my period was two weeks prior to our wedding, and my best friend did say that two weeks after is prime time for trying. She was right!

My pds. are very irregular and I didn't expect to ovulate at the end of June/beg. of July. But my ob/gyn says it's probably b/c I was so relaxed after the wedding and during the honeymoon. I think the key is to RELAX and NOT think about conceiving! We weren't expecting to become parents so soon, but we were open to it. This must have been God's perfect timing for us.

My ob/gyn also recommended taking prenatal vitamins starting 3 months before you are trying to conceive.

Tiger

09-12-2002, 09:13 PM

Both times it took me over 2yrs. But they were worth the wait!!
A bit of advice would be to enjoy everyday and don't wish your life away while trying.

saw

09-18-2002, 08:37 AM

Hi -- interesting thread! I thought I would chime in with our experience. I was on the pill for about 9 years before we started trying. I had very irregular cycles before I went on the pill, so I had no idea what to expect when I stopped taking it. I stopped in February (last year) and we gave it one month before we officially started "trying". We tried for two months with no luck. I had a couple of really odd periods -- lasted a long time, etc. so the doctor wanted to run some tests to make sure i was ovulating. So, we stopped "trying" and just had fun. About two weeks before I was to go in for the tests, I missed my period. I took a home pregnancy test and it was positive! We had a beautiful little girl on Valentine's day of this year.

I really think I was just too stressed out when we were "trying" and that relaxing and just having fun helped us a lot -- I know it's hard to not think about being pregnant all the time, but try to relax and hopefully it will help. Oh -- and I started taking prenatal vitamins about three months before we started trying, on the advice of my doctor.

Good luck!

Sarah

ISAIAH30_18

09-18-2002, 08:46 AM

:o another month down and still trying. Started on Monday after a day of being late....my hopes were slightly elevated I'd have to admit. This is my 3rd TOM since getting off the pill so nothing to get worried about yet. (Since my doc said expect it to take at least 3)

Meg O'c....hope things are going well with your efforts.

:D

Kim

ourthreegirls

09-18-2002, 10:12 AM

Originally posted by saw

I really think I was just too stressed out when we were "trying" and that relaxing and just having fun helped us a lot -- I know it's hard to not think about being pregnant all the time, but try to relax and hopefully it will help. Oh -- and I started taking prenatal vitamins about three months before we started trying, on the advice of my doctor.

EXACTLY what I was trying to say - but she said it much better :D

Jennifer

AmyJane

09-18-2002, 07:59 PM

Isaiah & Meg: Don't get discouraged. Everything will happen at the right time, and there is a reason for waiting sometimes. Like everyone says, relax and have fun!!! I actually wished we had a little more time before I got pregnant, but God has other plans for us!

We like to think our baby was conceived on foreign soil (Italy, on our honeymoon), but he/she could have come about in Livermore, CA on our wedding night. Hopefully it was Italy! I say, take a romantic trip somewhere ...

Meg O'C

09-19-2002, 05:11 AM

Thanks all. I didn't want to give the impression I was at the end of my rope! I am anxious to be a mom and disappointed that I wasn't one of those lucky "first month we were trying" (or at least 2nd, 3rd or 4th) but not depressed or upset. Every month I am not pregnant is a month to try to get into better shape/lose a few pounds, save a little more $$ for time off after a baby, do more stuff around the house. I feel good that something will happen soon. My Dr said to come back and see her if I am not pregnant by March (that will be 10 months). Hopefully I will be pregnant by then!

ISAIAH30_18

09-19-2002, 07:47 AM

Originally posted by Meg O'C
Thanks all. I didn't want to give the impression I was at the end of my rope! I am anxious to be a mom and disappointed that I wasn't one of those lucky "first month we were trying" (or at least 2nd, 3rd or 4th) but not depressed or upset. Every month I am not pregnant is a month to try to get into better shape/lose a few pounds, save a little more $$ for time off after a baby, do more stuff around the house. I feel good that something will happen soon. My Dr said to come back and see her if I am not pregnant by March (that will be 10 months). Hopefully I will be pregnant by then!

That's how I am too Meg....excited to get there, but have plenty to do in the mean time. :D

Chiffonade

09-22-2002, 04:26 AM

My only child is the product of a marriage that ended 2.5 years afer it began. During the whole 2.5 years, let's just say my husband and I knew each other carnally SEVEN times. Three of those seven happened the week I conceived. The only reason I knew when to try was "the bounce test." I heard that one way to judge when you're ovulating is to sit down hard and if you feel a twinge in either ovary, chances are you're ovulating. I inadvertently sat down hard and got the twinge. We tried that night and 2 more times that week.

I really feel for women who have trouble getting pregnant, be it by some problem in their own bodies or the man's. Fast forward 12 years and I tried to get pregnant by my wonderful (new) husband - and couldn't.