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View Full Version : My Dad has Lost His Mind-Hilarious Home Remedies



JHolcomb
11-23-2002, 06:24 PM
So my dad has a hernia--the type men get when part of the intestine pokes out through the belly button. Gross, no? Anyway, he's having surgery to correct it on Dec 26, but until then, it's getting worse and there is a bit of protrusion. Dad is really big on building stuff and figuring out how stuff works, so I guess what happened isn't too surprising. You should know that my father is a well educated, intellegent man...or so I thought...

So here's where it gets so funny I laughed until I cried.

My mom and dad were out shopping the other day when my dad mentioned to my mom that he needed some parrafin wax. My mom asked him why and he said "You know, parrafin wax, you use it for canning." My mom was like "yeah, I know what it's for, but why do you need it?"

Apparently, my father was planning on constructing a cork for his bellybutton to hold in the protrusion! So my mom, knowing that my dad is planning on constructing this medical apparatus, still allows him to buy the wax. Dad goes home and somehow constructs a cork to fit his bellybutton. The problem now is how he's going to get it to stay in the bellybutton---he decides on medical tape. So the cork, unsanitary though it may be, is working fine until a day or so ago when my dad presumably goes to check on the progress of the hernia and my mom hears a scream. For future reference medical tape takes off skin when it's removed ...so the cork is actually working well, but dad decides he wants to try building a new, improved version of the original prototype. He decides against medical tape this time and secures it with an Ace Bandage. He said it worked ok,except that it kept riding up.

Thank God he's getting the operation in less than a month!

wallycat
11-23-2002, 06:51 PM
At least he's creative :D :p

Laura B
11-23-2002, 07:30 PM
LOL. That sounds like such a Dad thing! I can just picture my own Dad doing something like that. :rolleyes: :eek: :)

muriel3002
11-23-2002, 07:42 PM
I can see my grandfather doing that, too. We had a woodcutting weekend at his place, which at 90 years old, he INSISTS on participating - a lot.

Well, this past fall, I find out afterwards that he things he cracked a rib or two. Well, he just bound himself up with masking tape. . . ( can't imagine what it was like to finally take that off).

Kahlico
11-23-2002, 08:43 PM
I see a new set of Time Life Books being written.......

:D
~emilie

Canice
11-23-2002, 09:49 PM
I would love to see your dad taking his clever idea on Martha's show! :p :p

HejazSunKat
11-24-2002, 02:12 AM
Originally posted by muriel3002
Well, this past fall, I find out afterwards that he things he cracked a rib or two. Well, he just bound himself up with masking tape. . . ( can't imagine what it was like to finally take that off).

lol..my Dad used to use duct tape instead of bandaids! Maybe you could recommend this to your Dad if the Ace bandage isn't doing the trick JH! :D I'm sure it would take off considerably more skin than medical tape when it comes time to remove it though! Too funny.

JHolcomb
11-24-2002, 07:09 AM
Originally posted by HejazSunKat


lol..my Dad used to use duct tape instead of bandaids! Maybe you could recommend this to your Dad if the Ace bandage isn't doing the trick JH! :D I'm sure it would take off considerably more skin than medical tape when it comes time to remove it though! Too funny.

FIL used duct tape to remove warts...then a month or so ago some prestigious medical journal came out and said this was actually a great way to remove warts---more effective than freezing or burning. So if my FIL was on to something, maybe my dad...naaaaah!

mochadelsol
11-24-2002, 08:53 AM
I do not recall any funny remedies of my dad, but I got to thinking about the remedy the dad had in "My Big Fat Greek Wedding",spraying windex as a cure for everything:p

muriel3002
11-24-2002, 07:54 PM
another Grandfather remedy I remember is using kerosene or white gas for athletes foot. Just wash your feet in the stuff. Also good for curing stinky feet.

dcornelius
11-24-2002, 08:54 PM
We are reading this thread and I am dying!!!!! I explained to DD "now you see why I like this BB so much!!!! You can find ANYTHING here!!!!!:D :D :D

HejazSunKat
11-24-2002, 10:49 PM
Originally posted by JHolcomb
FIL used duct tape to remove warts

OUCH! :eek:

Cherise
11-25-2002, 10:03 AM
Dad's certainly can be "creative" can't they? I think the strangest remedy my dad had was for athlete's foot also, he would dip his foot into a solution of LYSOL!!! The really strong stuff that came in the small brown bottle....once he made it a little too strong, and he kind of burned his foot a little. How do they think of these things?