Help! What to Cook for Friend on Strict Diet?

[Kristi]

I have some friends coming to my house this weekend for a girls' weekend type thing. I would like to do some cooking for them, but one is extremely strict in her diet. She eats very, very low fat to the point that she doesn't eat chicken and other lean meats b/c she thinks they have too much fat. So...my questions are, (1) should I even bother trying to cook?, and (2)if so, any suggestions on ultra low fat dishes that would still taste really good to everyone else?

[JillC]

Kristi-
I would suggest coming up with a meal that incorporates rice and steamed veggies. When my aunt was on a strict macrobiotic diet, this is often what she would order at restaurants. In addition to rice and steamed veggies you could make something that you and your other friends would find more appealing to serve over the rice. A good one to consider would be the Hawaiian Chicken recipe on the following thread: http://www.cookinglight.com/bbs/Forum1/HTML/003609.html
Hopefully everyone would be happy with this meal and your friend on a strict diet would feel included.
Jill

[lindrusso]

How about Vegetarian Chili? Very low fat and might appeal to others - you could even divide it and add meat to one of the portions. I have a recipe if you are interested.

You could also do a vegetarian pasta dish. I have a recipe for one with tomatoes, garlic, lemon juice and fresh basil. Easy, simple and yummy.

Or soup and salad? Just let me know if you need any recipes.

[acorreia]

Kristi,

Your friend sounds like me. I just came back from visiting the inlaws. I refused to eat any of the food they cooked....everything was fried.

Also, if your friend is like me, she may not even want rice at dinner (I eat my carbs early in the day).

Something I would eat, and it would be fun for everyone, is boiled shrimp. Boil it plain and make/buy different sauces for people to choose from.....and lots of lemons!

For desert, I usually eat sugar-free jello.

Hopefully she's not as restricting in her diet as I am. I would not wish this on anyone!

-Angela

[Julie O]

Your post concerns me. Why is your friend cutting out fat that much? Is it because her doctor has put her on a strict diet? Or, could she obsessed about her weight? I'm wondering if she is actually average weight, or is she already below average. It sound to me like she could be headed towards (or already having) an eating disorder. While we should all probably try to reduce our fat intake, there are limits. A normal, healthy person eat some fat each day without adverse health effects. The amount depends on the person. It just sounds to me like your friend might be a bit obsessed with fat. Please tell me more. I'm quite concerned. I had a friend who became anorexic, and I remember her being overly concerned about what she ate, particularly with fats. Hope you don't take this in the wrong way. I'm just very worried that your friend may have a problem.

[SueK]

Well, Kristi, I have to admit that I am as curious as Julia O. Is your friend on a restricted diet per doctor's orders? Also, Acorreia- not to be nosey, but is your diet due to a doctor's care also? I noticed you said "I wouldn't wish this on anyone" when you mentioned how restrictive your eating is, so I was curious. Hope I'm not stepping on anyone's toes by asking this......I am currently under a dr's care for some health concerns, and although my food intake has not been limited to certain things, it has made me more aware of those people that are restricted to eating certain types of foods.

[Kristi]

Thanks for all the suggestions, guys! I'm still pondering...

Julio O, I understand your concern and I am very concerned too. My friend was overweight through her entire childhood and into her twenties. Several years ago, she made the decision to lose weight and has lost around 100 pounds. She looks fantastic, but her eating habits and restrictions have gone overboard. She's afraid that if she splurges on anything or misses a workout that she'll be set back in her goals. I can understand that concern, but it is definitely obsessive and dangerous, not to mention un-healthy! It's a difficult thing to discuss with her b/c she worked so hard to get where she is, she figures she must be doing something definitely right. It's extreme dedication, and she's described it as an "all or nothing" attitude toward the way she needs to live her life. I'm not real sure how to talk to her about it.

[Leanne]

I like the boiled shrimp idea - add a big salad, maybe bread, boiled potatoes & corn on the cobb. Cook it all together in shrimp boil seasoning. Everyone can sit around & all eat together - more social than a regular dinner too. Yum! Im might have to make something similar for dinner tonight!

On the other topic - eating disorders are a hard topic to bring up. Ususally the person will deny it or rationalize around it - which is what I imagine your friend is doing. You make want to talk to the person she is closest to & see what they have to say about it & then maybe get advice from a doctor or psychologist about how to approach the situation if there really is a problem. Just a thought.

Good luck with dinner & your friend!

[This message has been edited by Leanne (edited 01-09-2001).]

[laughsandlaughs]

what about a pasta with a fresh tomato-basil sauce...like an angel hair pomodoro...usually this has olive oil, but you could do it with very little, just lots of fresh basil, garlic and tomatoes and could grill or saute chicken or shrimp for anyone who wants that with the pasta.

[SusanL]

Kristi-I don't think that anything you can say will help, she needs to heal from within. I know, in a nasty divorce, I lost 16 lbs. in less than two weeks and then continued until I was well under 100.(I wasn't overweight at that time.) The more people talked about it, the more obsessed I became with it. Eventually, I couldn't get away with the strange eating behaviors that I had created for myself. It was a most bizarre situation.
Why not ask her what she would like? Tell her that you know she eats low fat, what would she like you to prepare. Instead of anyone asking me, they always prepared high fat/calorie dishes-ok it was an old Italian neighborhood- so that I would gain weight. I can see your side and her side, too. I had to come to a decision in my life. Fortunately, my self esteem increased when I met a man who told me I couldn't smoke any more and that I was too skinny for him, he worried about me!I eventually married that greatest man!!
Your friend has worked so hard to get where she is, she must be so afraid to go back there again. I do understand, even though my situation was different. Knowing I am 10 lbs heavier than I want to be but am happier than I have ever been in my life, keeps me at this weight.I am not overweight but that nagging little voice has to be quelled. Acorreia, I hope that you are ok, please let us know why you feel the way you do, or did we incorrectly interpret your responce?

[acorreia]

Kristi,

Looks like this thread has taken a different turn....but, maybe it is for the best.

I've posted on the BB before. And, from some of my posts you can gather that I do have somewhat of an eating disorder.

I know I do and I see a therapist. The catalyst for me seeing a therapist came from the concerns of my husband and family. I don't think I would have seen one on my own. It can be humiliating at first. But, then you learn that you are doing this for your own health and well-being.

As far as this dinner, asking her what she will/will not eat is a good suggestion, as posted by SusanL.

As for you friend in general, she may need to hear concerns from family or close friends. But, the main thing is her health. We can all be obsessive/complusive and sometimes these "distractions" can run a natural course. But, if her eating habits are affecting her health, there may be cause for concern.

I took a good look at what I was doing to myself when my mom sent me info of the affects of having an eating disorder. The info was from a website. Let me know if you want the info and I can track down the site for you. Or, you can email me directly.

-Angela

[kwormann]

Angela

Please dont ever be embarassed to share health concerns with us. We are all interested in all aspects of health, not just cooking. I do understand what you are going through...I have had a problem through my life with binge eating (not binge and purge) and was on the cusp of a full blown eating disorder in college. I had lost weight in a fairly healthy way (down to 110), and was worried I would gain it back. SO, I weighed myself several times a day and ate nothing bu carrots and peanut butter. It probably couldve gotten serious if I hadnt fallen in love, which gave my mind something else to focus on. I have been through other weight ups and downs since then and am 12 lbs heavier than I would like (would like 122), but I think I have a healthier attitude (on most days) than I did when I was 110.

I guess what my rambling is trying to say is, others have gone through similar things, and as "sisters" (and brothers for you men) in the battle for health, we are there for you http://www.cookinglight.com/bbs/smile.gif!!!

Kim http://www.cookinglight.com/bbs/smile.gif

[bijoux22]

Kristi, try the www.fatfree.com (http://www.fatfree.com) website. They have a variety of fatfree/lowfat vegetarian recipes. Good Luck!

[GayeC]

A nice side dish that appeals to most people but would also work for a strict diet is homemade applesauce. The proportions I use are 6 Granny Smith apples to 1/2 cup apple juice, cinnamon and brown sugar to taste. You can also add 1/2 to 1 cup cranberries. If you have something that you can strain it through (I use one of those tall, conical colanders (a chinois?)) you can just cut the apples into eighths and throw them into a pot with the apple juice (skin, seeds and all). If not, you need to core and peel. Add the cinnamon (and cranberries if using them) and cook for 15 minutes or until the apples are quite soft. Strain (if not peeled) or mash (if peeled) and add brown sugar to taste. Delicious hot or cold.

You could also have a "make your own" salad meal, with ingredients for all types of eaters and diets.

[SusanL]

Angela, the fact that you can write about it is wonderful and you are seeing someone! Those are major accomplishments. Last night before I went to bed, I questioned myself for posting, then I knew it was the right thing. Everyone on this board has been so supportive, we are proud of each other's accomplishments and concerned about each other's problems. I agree with Kim, there are more of us out there than you would believe. You can do it!!!

[NotchJohnson]

Sounds like your friend is takinga good idea too far.

[Kristi]

That's exactly what has happened-- a good thing has gone way too far. She has no sense of moderation--although I can understand her point of view and her fears at the same time. I pray that she will eventually change over time and with gentle suggestions.

Thanks again, everyone, for all the suggestions. I will definitely ask her what she might like--makes things much easier!