Survey: What is it like to move away?

[Lizz13.1]

I live in New England. Yesterday we got 22 inches of snow...I do not want to wake up in 20 years and stated I wish I had moved to California. I HATE the cold/ice/snow. Has anybody out there ever just moved 3,000 miles away?

[CillaB]

Yes, we did it 2.5 years ago and have never regretted it. I lived in western MA for my entire life. When our youngest graduated from college. We moved south. We chose an area that resembles New England with the change of seasons etc. The only difference is the winter is milder and shorter and the nice weather is longer. Here I planted my pansies in the fall and had flowers all winter. Wow! The only downside of moving is leaving good friends behind. New friendships don't happen overnight. The making of memories takes time with new found acquaintances. I'm glad we made the move, but do miss having girlfriends to share with.

[BevP]

I'm not sure if I count as we are military and have to move with orders but...

Yes. I've moved from Florida to Virginia to Italy to California back to Virginia. Each of those definately 3000 miles. And here's my suggestion as whether or not to move. Are you adventurious? If so, go for it. You get a new town where you make new friends and learn the new roads and find the new grocery store with the items on different shelves and aisles. And new beautician, dentist and doctor. Beautician is the hard one. If you do move, pack your sense of adventure in your carry on luggage and paste on a smile to greet all the future friends you'll have.

I've always enjoyed our moves once we've finished the hard work of unpacking. I enjoy being in new places and getting to know them not as a visitor but a resident. Now I've never lived north in 20 inches of snow (and don't really want to http://www.cookinglight.com/bbs/smile.gif ) but who knows, it may happen.

[phantomcg]

When I was just out of college I decided that I was going to move to Alabama. I have a cousin who lives in Decatur and had been to see her a couple of times. I love Alabama. I love the weather and I love the people. I called my cousin up one day and asked if I could stay with her until I found a job and got settled. I think I stayed with her for about a month before I moved to Birmingham. Yes, there were times when it was lonely - I remember sitting and bawling for about an hour when I received the package from my folks for Christmas - but it was by and far the single best thing that I have ever done for myself. It really helped build my self confidence and taught me that I can rely on myself. Unfortunatly my Dad got really, really sick and I moved back to Michigan, ended up getting married and, I'm afraid, stuck here. Someday I'll move back to the south, but for now, I just couldn't bring myself to leave my Mom here all alone. Good luck on making your decision.

Cheryl

[Laura Wick]

Dear Liz 13:

I was raised in a military family and lived overseas for over six years. I've also moved several times as an adult, due to my husband's job transfers. We moved from FL to Colorado, then eight years later to San Diego, CA.

I would like to echo all the things that Cilla B and BevP said. Leaving close friends and family behind is the hardest part, especially if you have children.

In addition, be sure to carefully investigate job opportunities, salaries & the cost of living, especially housing, where ever you are considering as a new home. While the weather in southern California is very mild & sunny, the cost of everything here--housing, gas, & electricity--is skyrocketing.

Your age and your adventure quotient are two really important considerations, also. Perhaps a trip to visit the areas you are considering would be a good place to start.

If are considering Southern California, feel free to e-mail me and I'll be glad to give you any information I can.

I wish you lots of good fortune in whatever choice you make.

[Mary G]

Trust me, don't jump too quickly to write off New England. I was born and raised in Washington state, moved to NE to go to college, and haven't left yet (3 years after graduating). Concerning California, if you are partial to seasons (like I am) don't head to Southern California unless you want to shiver at 50 degrees. (No offense) I personally enjoy the changing seasons, looking forward to spring, and enjoying the amazing colors in the fall. However, this much snow is a bit rediculous!!!

[Vanessa]

I agree the hardest thing about moving is leaving friends and family behind. If you really dislike the weather where you are maybe a change will be good. You can always vacation in a place and get a feel for it too. I think once a person moves one gets used to a new place etc. An aunt gave me a vase that says "Bloom where you are planted" once when I was feeling a bit down on living far from family. Maybe you can do some reserch and find a place not as cold but as beautiful as where you are. http://www.cookinglight.com/bbs/smile.gif Good luck!

[Cindy Rafferty]

I moved from Western Ct. (Danbury) to Eastern Ma. (Norfolk) last January. Still New England, but I moved to a small town from a city of about 70,000.

I agree that it takes time to make new friends, for everyone in the family. The CL dinner group that I joined was formed last August, this has helped alot! My older son, now almost 10, wasn't happy moving in the middle of 3rd grade, but has since made several new friends.

It helps to have e-mail to keep in touch with your old friends, and see them when you can. True friends you won't loose, casual or work friends you may.

Yes, we've had alot of snow this year, it's a great time to try cross country skiing. I've been to Ca. and Fl, nice to visit but I'm another New Englander who looks forward to the change of seasons. It's been about 4 years since we've had a winter with a significant amount of snow, so I guess we were due!

[lsdesign]

We have just moved to New England from the south. Back when I was young and single my goal was to have a "wealth of experiences" in life and not necessarily to accumulate actual wealth. I got my wish. My kids are getting to experience winter in all of its glory, Liaa13.1. It is certainly difficult to start over at middle age, but I am hoping this our last move. Wouldn't want to go back south though, even with mild winters.

[SusanJoy]

I think moving is a great adventure - my family moved about every two years while I was growing up, just from mom and dad's restlessness. We lived in New England, California and the mid-west.

After living through 3 New Hampshire winters while I was in law school I vowed never to live anywhere cold again and moved to San Diego as soon as I graduated. Love San Diego.

Then, as luck would have it, just as the BF proposed, he also got transfered to Denver. That was fun too.

Now we are back in So. CA - more new friends, a new garden. Adventure abounds. No real "seasons" but yesterday was HOT and today is moderately cold.

Only you can decide if moving is worth it for you and those close to you - maybe you could find a temporary situation - like a 6 month leave/etc. and try it first.

Good luck and stay warm

Susan

[kwormann]

We have done it several times, and finally found the right place..Houston. We will never move back to the cold of Indiana.....

Kim (it is 70 today, blue sky, white puffy clouds....)

[ama47369]

Hi-I just wanted to say a few things. My husband and I just moved to Australia from Texas. We have been here for 4 months and will stay for 2 years. We love the excitement of exploring new things and new cultures. I feel this move has brought us even closer together as friends. There are definately times where we really miss friends and family from home. (Especially during the holidays) But, we took a trip during the Christmas break and that made it a bit easier.(kept us from thinking about it too much) I think it was definately worth coming here, we love it-and of course we know we will be able to come back after 2 years. But, maybe you could try it for a while and see how you like it, without the expectations of staying there forever. After college most of my friends, went all over the U.S. and I think they are all happy with their moves for the time being. Some are moving back home, but I don't think that any of them regret moving. And, even if you do move back home eventually, you may have a new outlook on everything. You might not like the snow, but you may really appreciate your friends, family, and favorite restaurants, stores, etc. Good luck. http://www.cookinglight.com/bbs/smile.gif

[Lizz13.1]

thanks to all who responded...you gave me such a great insight...temporary plans and check out the cost of living too. I really love how this BB is not just about Great Food, but also Great People and Advice!

[Don]

Hi Liz,

I have moved cross-country twice. The one thing I have learned is that you miss what you don't have. When I lived in L.A., I would have killed for some Maryland steamed crabs. Now that I have returned home, I yearn for good Mexican food.

At first, I loved L.A. The weather was always beautiful and the sense of adventure appealed to me. Later, the cost of living, congestion and earthquakes made me realize it was time to go home. Maybe it has something to do with where I came from. At my first job interview in L.A., the manager (who actually hired me) looked at my resume and said, "oh no, you're from that Baltimore-Washington area." I was shocked at the response and asked him why that was a problem. He told me that in his many years of managing, everyone he ever knew from that area always returned home. "There's something about that section of the country, that people from there always go back. I haven't seen that with employees from anywhere else in the country." Oddly enough, a couple of years later I hired an employee from the Baltimore-Washington area and she resigned four months later to return home. I guess the grass is always greener on the other side. Sometimes it stays that way, and other times it doesn't.

[MrsReber]

My sister moved to NC from NJ. We lived most of our lives in NJ- moved here from NY as children. She LOVES it. They get winter, but it's much milder and they don't get too much snow. They do get to see the seasons change, it's just not as dramatic. My father recently moved from NH to AZ. He loves it there. He says he feels like he is on vacation everyday. My little brother and sister also love it there. As my dad says "you don't have to shovel heat!" They were tired of the long winters.

It really depends on you, though. My husband and I liked AZ alot when we visited my dad, but we don't think we could live there everyday without the weather changing much and no big green trees to sit under. We like the snow very much, too, but don't think we'll like it so much when we are ready to retire. We have some property in VA that, for now, is the vacation/retirement property. We need to see the seasons change.
Good luck with your decision!

[Karenf]

Your story sounds like ours. We grew up in Minneapolis. Nice place to raise kids but oh so cold and the summers were HUMID!We wanted to move to a warm climate for years but it didn't work out until our youngest graduated from high school and my father-in-law passed away. We had a job opportunity in Southern California and we were skeptical of the whole "L.A." reputation but after a lot of research we decided to do it. I/we feel like we died and went to heaven. For 2 years we lived by the beach - biking, walking, people watching such energy! Then because of my husbands job location we moved to a fabulous community northwest and about 20 miles inland. We have been here for 2 years. We golf, bike and are active all year around. There is sooo much to do in California, so much to explore. It's driving distance to so many destinations like Las Vegas, Phoenix, Mexico, etc. I talk to family members frequently and travel back to Minneapolis in the summer. Two of our 3 adult children now live in so.Cal. and we get frequent visits from relatives and friends. We just don't miss the 'home' state.

[KellyD]

I have to concur with all the so cal comments. We moved from San Diego to Houston almost 3 years ago, and I've been ready to go back almost from the start. I was an Army brat and moved at least every 2 years growing up - so I thought this was no big deal. But while there's a lot to be said for an affordable cost of living - I'd trade my big house in the burbs for a one bedroom condo in SD any day! I miss being outside year round - and once you've been there long enough, there actually are seasons (yes, 50 degrees is cold and you need a ski jacket!) That said, we had reasons why we left - but sometimes it takes leaving to make you realize what you had. So while you may want to leave now, don't feel bad if you end up back home! The adventure will make you a better person - whether you end up loving it or wanting to move back home!

[Roo]

I moved from Rochester, NY to Charlotte, NC almost 7 years ago. I was really tired of all of the snow and wanted to move before I woke up one day and realized that I no longer was able to. I was fortunate to have a friend who was also moving to Charlotte so I knew at least one person in the state. Now I'm really glad that I moved when I did. I have a job I really like, a house, a husband.... All things that make me more rooted to staying in this area. I was really afraid that staying in NY I would put down the same types of roots and then not want to leave. I love to call family that still lives in NY and tell them that although it is February the forecast is for 78 degrees on Friday!
Go for it Liaa13.1.

[KristaMB]

I just wanted to chime in with all the San Diego folks. Although there are not "seasons" here that often, I just got caught in a major hail storm a few minutes ago while driving home from work. It's cold here right now! I know that cold is all relative, but you learn to see the seasons out of the minor weather changes. I also agree with KellyD, if you don't like it, you can always go back. You'll never know unless you give it a shot.

[BosunsWife]

I'm also in a military family. I have gone from Washington State to NYC, NYC to Saugerties, NY, Saugerties to Newport, RI and Newport to Honolulu. After 7 years of living on the East Coast, I was soooo glad to leave. I thoroughly thrive on the West Coast. Although I was originally hoping that we would be stationed back in Washington or maybe even California, I'm just loving Hawaii. A couple of weeks ago my father in law (lives in CT) called and said it was snowing and did I miss it. If he could have seen the look on my face - one of sheer incredulance. I said no and that I hoped to never live in a snowy area again! As I was telling him this I was also telling him that it was sunny, 80's and we were off to the beach for the day!

I love to move and when my husband retires I think we will have a hard time settling down in one spot.