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View Full Version : And now for something completely different.....Cuddle Parties????


lindrusso
09-02-2004, 07:37 AM
IMO, this is just plain weird and it won't be on MY list of party ideas:

Cuddling new craze for New York's singles
Monday, August 9, 2004 Posted: 11:47 AM EDT (1547 GMT)

NEW YORK (Reuters) -- It's not about sex and all about the touchy-feely experience of snuggling up to perfect strangers wearing pajamas.

The grab fests are called cuddle parties, and since they started in New York in February, hundreds of people have paid $30 each to touch and embrace others in intimate gatherings.

Everyone needs to be cuddled, especially in lonely New York, say creators Reid Mihalko and Marcia Baczynski, who say it's a good way to meet new and interesting people.

But the rules are clear. The PJs stay on the whole time.

In case things get too steamy, a small chime is kept on hand. Before the cuddling begins, the chime is struck several times so everyone gets the message.

"We've never used it," said Mihalko, who said sexual arousal does occur.

The idea for cuddle parties loosely came about after Mihalko, a 14-year masseur, began giving massages to other masseurs who never got the chance to receive them.

Signs that people need to be touched were brought home one day when Mihalko said he noticed a woman bawling from the emotional release that a massage provided her at an outdoor stand in midtown Manhattan.

"It started out as a joke," Baczynski said. "Now we talk about cuddling all the time. It's just been amazing."

Curiosity is a big driver for people who attend cuddle parties, and it is a better way to meet people than going to a bar, getting drunk and spending the night with someone just because of the need for some affection, she said.

A cuddle party is really about communication and not therapy, say the organizers.

Before any touching begins, participants gather in a circle to hear the rules and voice any questions or concerns. The first rule is that the event is not clothing optional, pajamas must stay on and sex is not permitted.

Participants team up into pairs, and to ensure the boundaries of what is permissible are clear, they practice saying "no" to the question, "May I kiss you?"

An introduction to cuddling ensues, first by hugging three people. People then get in a circle on their hands and knees, rub shoulders and moo like cows. After a bit of swaying, everyone falls to their side, which puts them into an easy cuddling position.

Cuddle parties are intended for people who are emotionally sound. People in therapy or who are seeing a mental health professional are asked to consult their doctor before signing up for a party and to tell organizers of their situation.

One group on an overcast Sunday drew a mix of mostly single people in their 30s and a smattering of older people.

A repeat customer who called herself a born-again Christian said it was good to cuddle up to another person, albeit a perfect stranger, after a hectic week.

"I felt good. I had a particularly stressful week," said the woman, who did not wish to be named.

Friends had warned her that the parties would be nothing more than thinly disguised preludes to sex, but she dismissed those worries as alarmist and unfounded, saying, "It's not about sex."

Like others, the chance to meet someone was a consideration in attending a cuddle party.

"People in a way are looking for a connection," Fernando said. "It's weird, but not unusual."

A man named Dwayne H., who described himself as introverted, said he thought the parties would help him relax before strangers and help him express his feelings.

"I have a problem showing emotion," he said.

I just say EWWWWWW. I don't want complete strangers touching me. Yuck.

Alysha :)

Jessica
09-02-2004, 07:42 AM
Thanks for the laugh, Alysha. I love New York :).

Jessica
09-02-2004, 07:43 AM
Oh, and I love the part about mooing like cows.

RebeccaT
09-02-2004, 08:14 AM
Oh, you've got to be kidding.

Mooing like cows? Will someone explain to me how cows are cuddly?

Jessica
09-02-2004, 08:18 AM
Mooooooooooo

RebeccaT
09-02-2004, 08:34 AM
awww. how cuddly.

ChristieinMB
09-02-2004, 08:34 AM
I saw that article (with photo) yuck, looks like the twenty-first century version of the sixties love-ins. At least they take place indoors, not in public parks. BTW, I just returned from San Francisco and found out the sixties are alive and well in Haight-Ashbury! :)
Christie

KathrynY
09-02-2004, 08:35 AM
I'm with you Alysha - just plain weird. :)

funnybone
09-02-2004, 08:38 AM
Are we to believe that the men will be satisfied with just cuddling? :rolleyes: ;) :D

CompassRose
09-02-2004, 08:49 AM
Probably. I think this is very sad, myself. I could see being that lonely.

KimE
09-02-2004, 08:49 AM
This is just bazaar. I do now that after loosing a spouse after being married for years and the children are grown many people do suffer from someone touching them, or if someone has beenv ery ill and everyone is "afraid" to touch them. After I lost my mother to cancer they told us to be sure to give my Dad extra hugs and pats on the back or just hold his had because that will be dearly missed.

Come on, a complete stranger, I still have a problem hugging some friends.

And the cow thing.............


Kim

Wendy w
09-02-2004, 08:54 AM
Originally posted by funnybone
Are we to believe that the men will be satisfied with just cuddling? :rolleyes: ;) :D

Isn't that the truth?

The whole thing is pretty weird. I'm single, but I will definitely pass on this one. :rolleyes:

HRJ
09-02-2004, 09:05 AM
This is happening in New York???? Seems to me most New Yorkers can barely bring themselves to make eye contact with other people.

And they discourage people who are in therapy from participating? That must really pare down the guest lists. Guess I'd always assumed everyone in New York was in therapy. :rolleyes: ;) :)


Helene (born and raised in NYC ;) )

lindrusso
09-02-2004, 09:29 AM
The article in my paper today (which prompted me to share this online version with you all :) ) didn't mention anything about mooing. Don't know what the mooing is about.

I just see this as a perfect place for people with things like foot fetishes to go and "get off", even if they supposedly claim it's not about sex or orgies or that kind of thing.

Heebie-jeebies, I tell you! :D

doggerham
09-02-2004, 10:06 AM
Hmmm, reminds me of that episode of CSI with the people who dressed in animal costumes and then went "yiffing" and got into "fur piles". It was represented as pretty far out, but I suppose to each his own.

Gilgamesh37
09-02-2004, 10:16 AM
Vanity Fair had an article about Plushies and Furries about a year ago, people who dress in furry animal costumes and some of whom actually want to be animals. I found it sort of fascinating--it's so far from my mindest it's hard to imagine--and some of them seemed quite sad.

As to the cuddle party, count my vote as "ewwwww." I'm not normally a germophobe, but just the though of all those strangers spooned right up against my back, breathing on me, and all those random (probably unwashed) hands.......yugga.

colleency
09-02-2004, 10:23 AM
Originally posted by Gilgamesh37
As to the cuddle party, count my vote as "ewwwww." I'm not normally a germophobe, but just the though of all those strangers spooned right up against my back, breathing on me, and all those random (probably unwashed) hands.......yugga.

I'm totally with you on that...ick!

I was once at a science fiction convention, and I was self-appointed dog-sitting someone's Bishon Frise that had been allowed to wander from room to room on the party floor of the hotel. I was wearing a long black skirt and a tight, fluffy pink sweater.

I mistakenly followed the pooch into a furry party. It's rather odd when the conversations of a whole group of people stop so they can watch you...kinda creepy.

colleency
09-02-2004, 10:25 AM
Btw, most furry fans are not as odd as that article made out. They are fans of animals in the way that people are fans of movie stars: pictures, t-shirts, etc. Of course there are the odd ones that take it a little too far.

jrichards
09-02-2004, 10:35 AM
I agree, this sounds terrible!!! However, it's not a new event.

My sister's junior high/high school best friend took part in many "cuddle puddle" gatherings in 1995/1996. She met her husband at one. These were at various locations out west.

Jennifer

Edited to say she did these in her junior/senior year of college.

slknight
09-02-2004, 11:28 AM
Originally posted by doggerham
Hmmm, reminds me of that episode of CSI with the people who dressed in animal costumes and then went "yiffing" and got into "fur piles". It was represented as pretty far out, but I suppose to each his own.

Ugh, I remember that one. So strange.:eek:

greysangel
09-02-2004, 11:37 AM
we did "lock in" slumber parties in college...though the pj's didn't always stay on :eek: :D

Hey it was a music and fine art school..what can I say :o :D

j

Wendy w
09-02-2004, 12:33 PM
I remember a coworker mentioning the plushies and furries once. I couldn't believe it. :rolleyes: I guess I don't get out much and you know, sometimes its ok.;)

tbb113
09-02-2004, 12:41 PM
The part that sounds odd to me is the pj part. Why would you willing get into pjs in front of strangers to be cuddled. I could be cuddled just fine in my street clothes....

There is talk of them franchising/expanding this across the country. What an interesting way to earn a living :cool:

Ms. Chevious
09-02-2004, 07:43 PM
Originally posted by ChristieinMB
just returned from San Francisco and found out the sixties are alive and well in Haight-Ashbury! :)

Yep, that giant Gap at the intersection of Haight & Ashbury sure is a throw back.

And yeah, ew on the cuddling.

jrichards
01-15-2008, 10:23 PM
I caught a rerun of Scott Baio's show "40 and still single" (or something like that), and he went to a cuddle party!!

It was a funny episode.

Jennifer

Puppylove
01-16-2008, 12:20 AM
OMG :eek: ! I can't stand it if someone stands too close to me in the check out line at the grocery store, I could never do this!

Jezebelly
01-16-2008, 12:55 AM
I had a crazy friend who LOVED this. I thought it was really freakin strange too.

blrn1
01-16-2008, 03:30 AM
Ew. That's weird. Ew.