Teachers and parents: resource for the "difficult" child

[ellery]

I feel kind of hokey putting this up here, but I went to this seminar today and was really impressed with this speaker and his ideas. I don't know who's heard of him or who's interested, but it's Howard Glasser and he works with what he refers to as "intense" children. He's got some really interesting ideas that resonated with me so I thought I'd put it out there.

The website with more information is www.difficultchild.com and it details his theories and from what he says anyone can ask questions on this website and expect an answer within about 24 hours. I bought the book today and (obviously) haven't read it yet, but was really impressed with this approach. It's about focusing on strengths and positive reinforcement and eliminating the reinforcement that kids get from more traditional "punishment" such as lectures, elaborate time-out strategies (i.e. one minute for every year old the child is), etc. Glasser's theory is that traditional parenting methods work for the "easy" kids, but not so well with the more challenging ones. He specifically addresses kids with ADHD/ADD, the oppositional, defiant, and just generally hard to manage kids.

Just putting this out there in case anyone finds it useful!

:)

Leah

[jmarie]

7 years ago, I would have jumped on it. Hope others find it helpful!
I am sure there are readers here, who will go straight to
amazon. like I would have done...I was so desperate for anything that would work.
All is well,now. But for about three years, it was like beating my head against the wall.
He (we) had a tough time.
Joyce

[newtricks]

My older sister loves that book. I've reccomended it to some friends.

[clairea]

Thanks for the recommendation, Leah. As you know, I have one of these "challenging" children of my own, and also have one in my classroom. I am definitely going to take a look at this book.

Claire

[ellery]

Originally posted by newtricks
My older sister loves that book. I've reccomended it to some friends.

Oh yay! Someone else has heard of him!

I'm just wondering if the book will make as much of an impression as seeing him present his stuff. (He sells a video too). I just REALLY liked the ideas about creating opportunities for success with the child and the examples he gave really clicked with me. I even dreamed about the stuff last night - I hate it when I work in my dreams. ;)

Apparently he's really big in Tucson and (according to him) has done some really amazing things with kids and schools there. It would really be worth seeing him if he comes to your area - in the audience yesterday there were other therapists, as well as teachers and some parents who were just there for help with their own kids.

Really neat stuff.

:)

Leah

p.s. The website actually goes into a lot of detail - with excerpts from the book and explanation of the theories if you'd like more information before investing in the book. Also the website lists therapists across the country that practice this technique, as well as where his workshops are planned for.

Yeesh. I should be getting a kickback for this... ;)

[jellyben]

Thank you! I am the parent of a 'difficult' child with ADHD tendencies, and we struggle with finding appropriate responses for a child with already fragile self-esteem.

I look forward to checking out his website!

[claire797]

Thanks for the info, Leah. I wouldn't call my daughter difficult, but she's definitely "spirited" and anything I can do to pre-empt her getting labeled as ADHD is appreciated. It's absolutely frightening how many children out there are getting prescriptions for Ritalin these days. Some children truly need it, but I have mixed feelings about how many really do. I just ordered a book on bringing up spirited children. After I finish that one, I'll probably order this one. At any rate, I've bookmarked this site and thank you again for posting.

[clairea]

Anna, did you order "Raising your Spirited Child"? That is another excellent book. I originally read it when DS was about 18 months, and still refer to it frequently (he is now 7).

Claire

[claire797]

Originally posted by clairea
Anna, did you order "Raising your Spirited Child"? That is another excellent book. I originally read it when DS was about 18 months, and still refer to it frequently (he is now 7).

Claire

Yes, that's the one I ordered. I think someone (it might have been you, Claire -- if so, thanks!) mentioned it on the board and I immediately went to Amazon and ordered it. Should be here any day now. That's good to know you've been referring to it over so long. That's how I am with my Dr. Sears Baby Book :). Of course DD is not a baby anymore so that book is finally getting a rest.

Another book that was recommended to me was Dr. Dobson's "Raising the Strong-Willed Child". However, I've heard more good reviews on Raising Your Spirited Child".

[badunnin]

Leah - thanks for the rec! I have a classroom full of 'difficult' children, that are in my class precisely for that reason. :rolleyes: I found out last week that I'm losing 2 of them because they will be reclassified as special education, and thus eligible for a study skills class. Next semester I have 31 of them in one class! It's a crime. :(