Do you take off your shoes before entering your house?

[Kay Henderson]

When I lived in Sacramento, I only knew one person whose home was "leave shoes at the door." When I moved here, to my surprise, a good majority of people remove their shoes as they enter their homes, and at least half request that their guests do so as well. This is true in the summer as well as in the winter when people are likely to be wearing boots.

I'm just curious. What do YOU do? Is there a clear custom in your community, or is it "some do, some don't?" Is the time of year involved?

Kay

[HDgirl]

I take my shoes off after I've entered my house. I don't ask guests to do the same. We do have one rule about shoes, we have just redone our 84 year old staircase. Stripped, sanded, stained, poly, if I catch anyone on those stairs with shoes....OMG!! :D

I've never been asked to take off my shoes at someone's home.

[ClaraB]

I voted that I do, and I normally ask people to do so as well. I grew up in an area where this was normally done, and I wonder if it wasn't because it was rainy/snowy quite often there. To me, it's a matter of hygiene - honestly, you don't know what's on your shoes (dirt, germs, chemicals), and it all ends up on your floors if you leave your shoes on. I'm quite surprised, here in North Dakota, to find that many people leave their shoes on inside - how do you keep your floors clean if you do?

[Lisa W]

I always take my shoes off when I enter a house and only require guests to do so during the wet, muddy season.

I do remember when DH and I (this was before we were married though) visited his family in La Jolla, California and we walked into his aunt and uncles beautiful home I removed my shoes, as did DH. We walked with his uncle through the house and out on to the back patio. He then looked at us funny and asked us why we took our shoes off. :o Was it a Canadian custom? :rolleyes: :)

[gertdog]

We take ours off as soon as we come inside, but we don't ask guests to do so.

I had an argument about this with a previous housemate. I took my shoes off to keep the floors clean, thinking along the lines mentioned above- shoes can track in dirt, grease, germs, etc. He kept his shoes on, saying that wearing shoes at all times protects him from getting any germs or dirt on him.

I do know some people who wear shoes around the house because the support provided by shoes is more comfortable than going barefoot or wearing soft slippers. Personally, I love going w/o shoes.

[linsleyd]

I leave mine on, hardwood cleans up pretty easily. When I was about 13 my parents built a new modern house with white carpeting and white pine floors and they required everyone to take their shoes off. 16 years later, they don't bother asking!

[Canice]

I don't,though it certainly does make sense to do so - for a number of reasons.

DBF tried to implement the policy when he had his floors redone but I thought it was rude to ask that of people. He has very Asian sensibilities and lives in a very Asian neighborhood..walk down the streets there and TONS of houses have their front stairs lined with shoes of every size! :)

[Ms. Chevious]

Absolutely, every time, and no one gets past the foyer without doing the same. If I put my shoes on to go out and have forgotten something I'll take them off before running back into the house! No matter how late I am! :o

[bobmark226]

OOOOOOOOOO, you gave me a shiver here. My mean Auntie is obsessive on this subject, cowed me into cold feet throughout childhood and adolescence and to this day, although she is past eighty still terrorizes me whenever I walk in. She says nothing, her eyes just go straight to my feet. Every single time. And I comply.

Bob

[leightx]

We take them off occasionally - just because. I can see why people do it for clean carpets, germs, etc. I'm just not that paranoid. I have 2 large dogs and 2 kids - I've got bigger fish to fry than "shoe germs".

Honestly, I find it appaling when people ask me to take off my shoes at their house. If it is a good friend, and I see her take her shoes off, I'll usually do the same. Or if I have mud or dirt on my shoes, they come off. But I was blown away when we went to a party and they asked everyone to remove their shoes at the door. This was the middle of the summer, and we live in Texas - there was no mud or snow to consider. What if people have stinky feet? Or unmatched socks??

[RebeccaT]

When I get home from work, I often change into "comfy clothes," and this usually means sock feet. But I don't do it for my floors, I do it for my comfort. But if I'm cooking for extended periods of time, I always wear tennis shoes, or else I can feel it in my legs!

DH's family is actually pretty obsessive about leaving shoes ON. When we used to live out of town, and would come visit, I would feel self-conscious about padding around in my sock feet inside when they were wearing shoes in their own home. Of course, this was when I was a newlywed, and I felt self-conscious about EVERYTHING when it came to my inlaws! :o ;)

I think it makes sense if you live in a rainy or snowy climate, but I just don't understand the obsession if you don't. None of my friends remove their shoes in their homes, either.

[Peeps]

I do it and ask others to do it (though most will see me do it and do it without me having to ask). I decided to start doing it when I moved into a new place with light carpeting. There is a small area of lino by the front door and I was amazed once I started mopping floors that the water that came out of the mop from that little area that gets shoe traffic (and about 2 steps of traffic a day, just me taking off my shoes) was horrifying - filthy, dirty water! (And I don't live in a muddy climate or anything.) Compared to the kitchen floor where there is no shoe traffic - water always comes out totally clear from the mop. Seeing that reinforced the decision...just thinking about that much grime getting into the carpets and then me walking on that grime barefoot sometimes...and then getting into bed with those grimey feet...skeeved me.

[MNGirlTX]

Originally posted by leightx
What if people have stinky feet? Or unmatched socks??

Too funny!! I've known a couple people who fall into the stinky feet category - but the unmatched socks is just making me laugh!!!!

I usually take mine off as soon as I walk in the door. Unless I know I am going right back out. I have a little bit of a shoe fetish (as in, I love to buy them and have them)...but I don't necessarily want to wear them! Weird, I know. However, my habit also stems from childhood...In the 70's Grandma and Grandpa got brand new shag carpet in the house and we weren't allowed to walk on it with our shoes on.

And, I take them off at friend's homes, too. It's just automatic.

Lori

[Clover]

I always took them off when I had new carpeting. Now that it's old, I may take my shoes off for comfort, but it's not for the sake of the floor. In any case, I would never ask guests to do it. This isn't Japan. A lot of people would be made uncomfortable by being coerced into taking their shoes off, and, to me, asking them would be saying that I cared more about my floor than I did about their feelings. And there's also the unexpectedly exposed holey sock or stinky feet issue.

[hlao23]

I don't just because we have a dog. She doesn't wipe her feet or put on slippers. :D

I do tend to wear slippers around the house for comfort.

[Meganator]

We have light-colored new carpet in most of the house, so we always remove our shoes before walking in the carpeted areas. However, I never ask guests to do so; some do anyway. We have had quite a few contractors in the house though, and I DO ask them to remove their shoes, which they have all done without complaint.

My advisor in grad school had a shoe-free house. They kept a basket in the front entry way which contained many pairs of those fuzzy colorful footie-socks for everyone to put on after removing their shoes.

When doing the laundry the other day, I noticed that my husband had worn a pair of socks, each with a big hole in the heel! :eek: I am afraid they may have been the ones he was wearing when we had our company holiday at our house last weekend. Can you actually put on a pair of socks and not NOTICE that they have big holes?

[Paula H]

I only take my shoes off straight away if I've been out in the garden and it's muddy.

Usually I take my shoes off at some point while I'm wandering around the house, since I prefer to be in barefeet (or socked feet in winter).

[Varaile]

Shoes usually come off. I live in the country, with two dogs and a gravel driveway. So much stuff comes in on the shoes that I just want to minimize how much gets tracked around.

And my few guests (mostly family) usually remove theirs as well. Folks who know us bring "house shoes" in the way of slippers or other approproriate inside type footsie wear. I too, wear a very old pair of birkies on the main floor. The puppies tend to "drool" :rolleyes: after drinking and I (and guests) have learned that some kind of barrier between the lurking water and dry tooties is necessary. :eek::rolleyes:

[MISSINDI]

Like others, when I get home for the night, I'll change into comfy clothes and stay with socked feet or slippers, but purely for comfort. With a two-year-old, a Bernese Mountain Dog (longish hair) and 2 cats, like another, "I've got bigger fish to fry."

That said, our two-year-old has refused to wear slippers, even Spiderman ones!, until just recently. My mom and sister kick off their shoes once in awhile and go barefoot and he practically has heart failure ... "No, grandma, put shoes ON!" He's just starting to wear his slippers now, but hasn't understood that it's ok to be barefoot. Kids - ya gotta love 'em! ;)

[JenniferJJ]

I take them off and ask my guests to also. The reason is because of my fairly new light carpet. I don't feel bad about asking guests to take their shoes off because that is the norm in many houses I've been invited to. This is so common that I carefully choose my socks when going to someone's house - no holes, cute design, must match! I know a lady who makes lunch after church for anyone who wishes to come - even people who have not met her invite their friends (her desire). Anyway, you need to take off your shoes but she has knitted many pairs of slippers for people to wear in the house.

[clairea]

I usually take my shoes off in the house, but really just for comfort. Like Rebecca, I do wear shoes if I am doing a lot of cooking or cleaning so will be on my feet a lot. I have never asked a guest to remove their shoes, and would really be taken aback if anyone other than a very close friend removed their shoes at my house -- to me it implies a level of comfort and intimacy. Similarly, I usually where shoes in the house when we have guests. I have only been asked to remove shoes once, and was very surprised by the request. This was for a cocktail party in the winter, so I was wearing stockings and it was cold, and they had stone floors -- my feet were freezing all night!

This thread has been educational for me, because I never realized how many people take their shoes off for reasons other than comfort, or prefer that others do so. Next time I am asked to remove my shoes, I won't be shocked or appalled:)

Claire

[Kay Henderson]

I carefully choose my socks when going to someone's house - no holes, cute design, must match!

I'll tell you, I do now! It only took one time entering someone's house with socks with holes in them (and getting teased!) to change my behavior.

Kay

[Blissful_in_TX]

DH takes his off, but I keep mine on until I walk upstairs to the bedroom and then take them off for comfort. Then I have a pair of sandles by the kitchen that I slip on and off b/c it just kills my feet walking on hard floors barefoot.

I've never been asked to take my shoes off as a guest, and I would be quite shocked if someone asked me to. Likewise, I wouldn't find it appropriate if someone came into my house as a guest and took their shoes off (unless it's a close friend or family member, of course).

[HRJ]

I wear shoes in the house about 50 percent of the time -- the rest of the time I'm in slippers, or maybe Tevas, if it's the summer.

But when I first walk into the house, I almost never take my shoes off right away -- I'll wait until I go upstairs to change into slippers, unless I've been working in the garden, perhaps, or if I'm wearing winter boots that are wet or muddy. DH is the same way. Admittedly, I'm not the world's best housekeeper (much to my mother's dismay ;) ), so the "dirt factor" just doesn't bother me.

I've been to houses where I've been asked to take my shoes off, and I'm usually not thrilled about that, for several reasons -- particularly because I have diabetes, I try to be careful about taking care of my feet, and you never know if you might step on something, or stub your toe, particularly in an unfamiliar house. This is particularly difficult during the summer, if I'm wearing sandals, and I'm asked to take them off, because that means I'm left walking barefoot, something I try to avoid even in my own house.

I've noticed that when DS, who is 3, goes to another child's house for a playdate, the kids are often asked to take off their shoes, even if the adults aren't.

Helene

[RebeccaT]

Originally posted by clairea
This was for a cocktail party in the winter, so I was wearing stockings and it was cold, and they had stone floors -- my feet were freezing all night!



Now that's just odd. I would have felt so uncomfortable, trying to mill about and socialize in a more formal atmosphere with a bunch of adults in stocking feet! I mean, a Super Bowl party is one thing, but a cocktail party? :confused:

[AndreaU]

"Depends on the weather"

During the winter and on rainy days, they come off right away. Not that it makes a huge difference because the dogs end up with their little tracks all over the house at some point!

Most of my friends and family don't really care. I have one colleague who is FANATICAL about having guests remove shoes. We went to her house for dinner one night and she actually had all these slippers lined up for anyone who didn't want to walk around sock-footed!

[Canice]

Originally posted by RebeccaT


Now that's just odd. I would have felt so uncomfortable, trying to mill about and socialize in a more formal atmosphere with a bunch of adults in stocking feet! I mean, a Super Bowl party is one thing, but a cocktail party? :confused:

Heehee. Guess that strikes you from Larry Ellison's guest list! I remember reading about big pre-opera shindigs at his mansion, where all the women were required to remove their high heels. They were given satin slippers to wear.

[JanetJ]

We take our shoes off after we enter the house and it is solely for comfort (I wish our carpets were worthy of the no-shoes rule). Our friends will often take off their shoes as well, but we do not request it. If we are having people over for dinner or a party though I usually wear shoes myself. I have been asked to take off my shoes at other's homes before and haven't really thought much about it.

[RebeccaT]

Originally posted by Canice


Heehee. Guess that strikes you from Larry Ellison's guest list! I remember reading about big pre-opera shindigs at his mansion, where all the women were required to remove their high heels. They were given satin slippers to wear.

Gosh, just when I was ramping up all my favorite things about Oracle to share with him at our next meeting! :D

[Gecko]

http://bananapatchstudio.com/images/products/6M801.JPG



Most people here remove their shoes before going inside - that is if you are wearing any! :D

[badunnin]

Originally posted by Canice


Heehee. Guess that strikes you from Larry Ellison's guest list! I remember reading about big pre-opera shindigs at his mansion, where all the women were required to remove their high heels. They were given satin slippers to wear.


Dean Kamen (inventor of the Segway, among other things) requires the same thing. But the only parties I've attended at Dean's were large (about 200 people) and I can only imagine what that would do to the floors. We were all given little hospital booties to wear - I still have pics of me with Dean (who did wear shoes at his own parties) wearing my booties. ;)

[SueK]

When I first started dating DH it drove me nuts because he would take his shoes off at any house we visited. Even if it was a party and everyone else was wearing their shoes! I guess my MIL drilled it into their heads so much that he just did it automatically. On the other hand, I never take my shoes off at someone's house unless they specifically ask me. Even at home I usually wear shoes if I'm cooking, because as Rebecca mentioned, standing on my feet for awhile if barefoot tends to bother my feet and back.

I never ask anyone to take their shoes off at our house. Between the dog hair, when the dogs were around, the kids and the fine dust from the coal stove, we have enough reasons to get our carpets cleaned 3 or 4 times a year regardless of what anyone might track in.

[eas11]

Originally posted by Meganator
......My advisor in grad school had a shoe-free house. They kept a basket in the front entry way which contained many pairs of those fuzzy colorful footie-socks for everyone to put on after removing their shoes.....



OMG, I would hate that!
I do hope they have the person wearing some old used fuzzy footie-socks throw them right into a hamper to be washed after wearing them :rolleyes:

I'm very inconsistant. I love being barefoot, or without shoes and in just socks in the winter, but it's for comfort and not cause I'm worried about dirt.
I would never require my guests to take off shoes, but if they ask me when at the door, I tell them to feel free to remove if they are more comfortable, but not worry about tracking in the outside! I agree that if you've got kids and pets running in and out of the house, you worry less about bits of dirt and germs.

[wallycat]

I voted depends on the weather....at least for DH. He tends to leave his shoes on (which explains why our floors & carpeting look the way they do). I tend to take them off right away..or at least run upstairs and switch to slippers.

[Peggy]

Originally posted by wallycat
I tend to take them off right away..or at least run upstairs and switch to slippers.

DITTO! Strictly for comfort reasons. I don't ask my guests to take their shoes off. If they want to that is fine, if not that is OK too.

Peggy

[gabbyh]

Seriously, if you're wearing any...

When my Aussie husband moved in to my apartment in Bethlehem,PA...on a fall day, he was going to take a walk into Downtown Bethlehem...now, I had already got past the short shorts, and t-shirt, but he's walking out the door with NO SHOES ON...and I'm going: "where the heck are you going???"....and he's telling me he's walking into town to see our friends that own a jewelry store in town...well, the only thing we ever argued about was his foot wear, or lack of.............of course now we live in South Florida...but when I went to Australia for the first time, he took his shoes off at the airport, and didn't wear any for most of the trip...

I guess that's what happens when you grow up in a small beach town in Australia:D

~Gail

[HejazSunKat]

Originally posted by Canice
all the women were required to remove their high heels. They were given satin slippers to wear.

I've been thinking of instituting a 'no shoes' policy because we're putting down some very nice carpets in our 'public' rooms. I've been weighing getting the reputation of being anal retentive about my house against the price of having to get the carpets cleaned. I'd thought about putting a basket of slippers near the door for people to change into. How Martha Stewart is that? I still haven't decided what I'm going to do. Maybe I'll try the no shoes policy for awhile and see how it goes down. :)

Originally posted by leightx
Honestly, I find it appaling when people ask me to take off my shoes at their house.

And in Asia and other parts of the world they think it's appalling that people don't. I was working with an Indian woman last year and I'll never forget the huge carry-on she made about a friend of hers who'd visited her house the night before and didn't take off her shoes. She was shocked! Appalled! Thought it was so rude that this woman was walking around her house in SHOES!!! I was sitting there thinking to myself "Well, I guess it's a good thing you don't live in America where we pretty much never do it"

[Blissful_in_TX]

Just curious for those who require guests to take off their shoes, do you have plastic on your couches as well?

[rosie_one]

I really don't like being barefoot. I know... weird, but it's just the way I am. So, we have a shoes on house. We also don't have any carpet to speak of. Hardwood floors and tile. In the winter or on rainy days the boots come off immediately and are switched for stocking feet, slippers or clean shoes.

I have one friend whose parents require shoes to be removed at the door AND have plastic runners on the white carpet. It's a beautiful house. At least they request politely rather than stare you down until you take your shoes off!

[jphilg]

Wow...just goes to show that it takes all types. I am really suprised at the number of shoeless houses out there!

Personally, I think it is a little out of control to ask guests to take off their shoes, especially at a party. If it is a rainy Tuesday and I come over for coffee, I have no problem being asked to take my shoes off. But being asked to remove my shoes at a cocktail party? No way. I would really be insulted, unless it was at the home of someone from a different culture. Anyone who puts their carpets' appearance before their guests' comfort really should reconsider their priorities.

Dean Kamen and Larry Ellison need to consider either loosening up, or entertaining at hotels. My goodness.

And I grew up in a house with antique Persian carpets, so I can a appreciate the fact that carpets can be quite valuable. But, my friends, it is after all a carpet.

[sneezles]

With the guys doing stuff in the pasture every day, shoes outside the door are required for them! :p
Shoes that DS#3 wears to school only can be removed inside the door but go no further.
We have 2 large parties a year (Superbowl and 4th of July) but I do not require guests to remove shoes but some do on their own.

When we lived in Singapore it was never a question just common courtesy. Except for workers who came to our flat. I kept it quite cold (window unit in every room) and the tile floors were quite cold so on occasion the workers would ask if it was ok to leave their shoes on ;) and I always said yes.

[greta]

this is a tricky one for us...

my husband is from a culture that wouldn't think of NOT taking shoes off at the door.

my family tends to take our shoes off at the door, but we definitely don't ask others to do so.

if my husband and i had our druthers we would be a shoeless house. but i think we both feel a bit funny asking other people to take their shoes off--although, all of the non-american people who enter our house do so automatically. in kashmir, people insist that we don't have to take our shoes off--but we know better! :p

we're just not sure how we can tactfully go about having a shoeless house in america!!

any ideas?

[Kayaksoup]

I always remove my shoes. Vancouver can get really muddy with all this rain. I prefer it if my guests do likewise, but i am not going to order or even ask anyone to take them off. Most people I know do it automatically here.
And, no Blissful, I don't have plastic on the furniture.

If I go to someone elses house, I ask them what they would prefer. I just make sure my socks are always clean, non-holey and matching.

Just so you know, I don't have cocktail parties, just cozy homey gatherings, so that isn't an issue...

[funnybone]

I think this is a regional thing. In Ontario, I didn't know anyone who wore shoes in the house. When we lived in Georgia, I didn't know anyone who took off their shoes. I'm in the middle these days. I prefer to take mine off, but I've kept them on as well. It really depends on the type floor I will be standing or sitting on and type of visit as well (standing party or social chatting).

[Angelina]

If I came over and you asked me to take off my shoes, I would either comply or walk out and say "Sorry, I don't think that works for me".
Personally, I don't think it's fair to put guests in a predicament where they have to explain why they can not take off their shoes. I have a couple of pairs of shoes that I wear often because they are comfortable and dressy at the same time, and yet they DO make my feet smell to high heaven. Nothing I have tried can take that stink away. Do you really want to turn a nice gathering of friends into such an uncomfortable situation?

Also, like another poster mentioned, my husband has diabetes. What if there is a stray piece of glass somewhere from a broken glass? I don't know about anybody else, but it's hard sometimes to catch them all! He could step on it, not feel it, and the consequences could be catastrophic. :mad:

In short, if the weather is really bad, I probably won't be wearing my stinky-dressy shoes anyway, so it would be ok. But otherwise, the shoes stay on. You can stare at them till your eyes pop out, but they aren't going anywhere. Throw me out, if you must...but it's just shoes. :)

Angela

[Valerie226]

I have indoor & outdoor shoes. I keep all current ones on a rack where we come in from the garage. I take off my boots or outdoor shoes & switch to slides that I wear in the house. DH does the same. We're not compulsive about it but it does cut down on vacuuming & mopping. guests can leave their shoes on unless they are muddy in which case shoes come off. When we are working in the yard & get muddy we leave boots in the basement. It's a little inconvenient but cuts cleaning time by a big chunk.

[BarbaraL]

Growing up, it was the norm to keep your shoes on. However, I'm always kicking shoes off and running around barefoot or in socks (DH gets annoyed that my shoes are always all over the place). At other people's homes, I usually do what they do (most of them keep their shoes on). My best friend in middle and high school was Chinese (and I still see her when she visits from California). I always take my shoes off at her or her mother's home. I was never asked to, but when we'd go in, she'd always take her shoes off, so I did too. It was never an issue, I never thought anything about it.

[HejazSunKat]

Originally posted by jphilg
But being asked to remove my shoes at a cocktail party? No way. I would really be insulted, unless it was at the home of someone from a different culture.

Interesting. If you came into my house and I, as an Irish/American, asked you to remove your shoes it would be an insult but not if I were Japanese (for example)? I'm not picking on you Jen I just found it interesting that it appears the ethnicity of the homeowner would engender a different reaction to a request to remove shoes.

[Kay Henderson]

Thank you for satisfying my curiosity! As near as I can tell from the responses, "some do, some don't." The only major pattern I see is that at least in the north American homes of those who responded, taking off shoes appears to be more common in wet and/or snowy places than in dry, sunbelt areas.

I remember taking a sociology class many years ago. One of the things that stuck with me was that a challenging aspect of studying an unfamiliar culture turns upon practices that are so completely accepted that it doesn't occur to informants to mention them. Take off shoes? Not take off shoes? Of course! Doesn't everyone?

So one of the interesting things about travel and interacting with people from different areas (like on this Board) is discovering that what is "of course!" for me isn't necessarily the case for everyone.

Thanks again for enlightening me!

Kay

[jphilg]

Originally posted by HejazSunKat


Interesting. If you came into my house and I, as an Irish/American, asked you to remove your shoes it would be an insult but not if I were Japanese (for example)? I'm not picking on you Jen I just found it interesting that it appears the ethnicity of the homeowner would engender a different reaction to a request to remove shoes.

Well, I think it has to do with expectations. If I am going to a home that practices Asian customs, it will be my expectation that my shoes are coming off, so I can dress accordingly. But in my everyday comings and goings, the shoes are part of the outfit, and I don't put on socks thinking that they will be seen. I would double check my socks in such a situation. And I invariably tear hose in two seconds if I am barefoot, so I wouln't wear hose either.

I was thinking about this thread tonight...I had an appointment in Dupont Circle, which is one of the hipper neighborhoods in this very un-hip city. Because of the time of year, and the fact that it was 7pm, I saw a number of couples headed out to what I assumed were holiday parties. And I noted some fabulous shoes. These women clearly were not expecting to leave their shoes at the door.

[leightx]

I think that Jen nailed it on the head for me too. I had a friend from Thailand when I was in elementary school, and they never wore shoes in the house. Of course I thought it was odd the first time (having NEVER seen such a practice, literally), but quickly grew accustomed to slipping my shoes off when we visited at her house.

I really do understand the reasons - it does make more sense to take off shoes in your house, and if I remembered to do it, I'd probably take mine off more often too. I stay home with the kids (when I'm not traveling), so I put a high priority on comfy shoes - it's not like I'm wearing heels all day and am dying to kick them off as soon as I walk through the door.

That said, I would still feel incredibly awkward asking others to do so. If I were up north where there was snow and mud to consider, then that might be different. But I just don't go places prepared to kick off my shoes at any given moment - my feet do occasionally get smelly :o and I have been known to leave the house in mismatched socks. I try to make guests feel as comfortable as possible in my home, and since I've been made to feel awkward by taking off my shoes in others homes, I wouldn't personally request it of my own guests. I have laminate floors anyway, so dirt and such are no problem.

Linda, I think that if I were in your situation, I wouldn't ask guests to remove their shoes. I'd just hope that they noticed that I wasn't wearing any and choose to do it themselves. If they didn't, I'd assume that there might be a reason, and leave it at that. And if I were the guest in this scenario, if there was a reason I didn't want to take my shoes off the first time I visited, I'd most likely make sure to wear my prettiest socks the next time I came over and take my shoes off at the door.

[Paula H]

Originally posted by leightx
Linda, I think that if I were in your situation, I wouldn't ask guests to remove their shoes. I'd just hope that they noticed that I wasn't wearing any and choose to do it themselves.

I find an amazing number of people remove their shoes when they come into my house, even though I don't ask them to. I think most notice that I'm in barefeet and presume they should remove their shoes too - even though the only reason I'm in barefeet in because I feel more comfortable that way!!

At the moment, due to all the dust everywhere from the builders, we're wearing our shoes in the "work in progress" spaces (which includes the hall, just to make things interesting) and kick them off as soon as we enter a "clean" room. It's helping to keep the tracking of dust down a little.

[Peggy C.]

did not read the entire thread. BUT as the daughter and grandaughter of carpet salesmen I will give you my answer.

I do not remove my shoes. And neither does any of my family UNLESS it is purely for comfort.

I personally think it is rude to ask someone to remove a garment of clothing for the sake of a carpet. There is also the stinky foot issue or the issue of socks that badly need mending.

However I will remove mine if requested in someone elses home. ( I probabley won't go back though!;) )

[HejazSunKat]

Originally posted by Peggy C.
I personally think it is rude to ask someone to remove a garment of clothing for the sake of a carpet. There is also the stinky foot issue or the issue of socks that badly need mending.

However I will remove mine if requested in someone elses home. ( I probabley won't go back though!;) )

Wow! Strong reactions. I'm glad I read this thread before I started a no shoes policy. I'm constantly amazed by people's feelings and opinions about issues that come up on this board - anything from removing shoes in the house to whether to let your dogs eat off the dinner plates to how to address cards to a married couple. Like Kay said, what's an 'of course' to one person is not so clear cut to another. I was thinking more about asking my family members (with whom I can get away with more! :) ) than unrelated people. After seeing a construction boot print from my BIL on a brand new Turkistani carpet when he was helping DH with a project I began to think about it. While I don't want guests to be made uncomfortable in my home what about their responsibility as guests in my home? Shouldn't they be as mindful of not damaging things as I am of their comfort?

[pinky]

I, being a Chinese-American, always take my shoes off when I enter my own home. DBF, who is not of Asian descent, usually does too - it's more about comfort for him, but for me, I grew up not wearing shoes in the house and I feel absoltely odd if I'm at home with shoes on.
My apartment is pretty small, so I can't have large parties, but when a few friends come over, they usually take their shoes off too - but maybe just because a lot of them are Asian and are used to it.

When I go to other people's houses, I don't feel odd either way - if they take off their shoes, I take mine off. If they walk in with shoes, I do too. Personally, I wouldn't feel weird either way.

[tbb113]

I keep going back and forth on this one. I usually am in barefeet or just socks in the house (and so are my kids). This is strictly a comfort issue, not a cleanliness issue. ;)

I would respect my host's wishes and remove my shoes if asked. However, keep in mind, that might leave me barefoot, since I don't always wear socks. It might also leave my pants dragging on the ground. I'm short, I wear heels for a reason. I also hem my pants for the heels not my barefeet.

[lakelady1]

Carpets and floors are supposed to be walked upon. In the most of the continental US (and Alaska, I suppose), that means with shoes. To be asked to take off my shoes (except for some incredible reasons that I can't think of at the moment) would make me feel very unwelcome. At my own house, I kick them off, but wouldn't require anyone else to do so (well, maybe someone under the age of 10 who was coming in from rainy-day play). And I sure wouldn't want to put on socks-in-a-basket that I didn't know where they had been! Someone may worry about where by shoes have been, but my bare feet may wonder what's been on your carpet/floor . . .

[Gilgamesh37]

I am virtually always barefoot or sockfoot in my own house, but that's mostly for comfort. In my part of the midwest, most folks will take their shoes off upon arrival in the winter because you're usually muddy, snowy, or tracking in road sand/salt. Even so, I wouldn't specifically ask someone to remove their shoes unless they were obviously and visibly muddy/tracking stuff in--even though we have white carpets. I do find it a bit offputting if someone specifically ASKS me to remove my shoes--I think offering ("kick your shoes off if you feel like it") = I want you to be relaxed and comfortable, whereas "please take your shoes off at the door" = I care more about my carpet than about you, my guest.

I will say that the weirdest situation I think I ever faced was when I was househunting, and on a rainy Saturday went to an open house. I opened the door and there must have been 30 pairs of shoes in the foyer---it was a no-shoes-allowed household. I was barefoot in clogs, so then I had to tromp all through this lovely home with my bare, slightly squidgy from the rain, very ugly feet. (I should have just turned right around and left, but I was really interested in the house)

[Canice]

Funny, in reading through this and even thinking of my own comment about the rows of shoes outside the houses in DBF's (mostly Asian) neighborhood, I just remembered a totally opposite experience I had. When I was going to school in Italy I had to stay with a friend for a few days while I moved. Her landlady had this irritating habit of coming over and hanging out at the apartment..puttering about, ironing, praying for a tenant for the second bedroom, etc. Well, she nearly expelled me when she saw me walking around in socks. She was truly horrified. And of course told me that I was going to catch my death of a cold. Uhm, it was June in Umbria so I kinda doubt that. Just culture.

[SLFlyt]

Reminds me of the "Porno Gil" episode of "Curb Your Enthusiasm". Larry goes to a party, refuses to take off his shoes, breaks a lamp, is asked to leave, and has to give his dreaded "double-goodbye".

[kristalsnow7]

I always change into slippers or indoor clogs when I get home, but it's purely a comfort issue for me. I even wear slippers in the summertime, because I don't like to go barefoot on our hardwood floors. But I would never ask someone to take off their shoes when they entered my home. As was mentioned before, the feelings & comfort of my guests take priority over the cleanliness of a rug or carpeting. I can always get them cleaned! :)