The stupid files

[tamawrite]

Around here, we say he's...

...a few pickets shy of a fence.

...a few feathers shy of a chicken.

...a few wheels short of a semi.

I could go on, but I'd rather hear yours. :D

[SandyM]

Someone said "He's not the sharpest knife in the drawer" yesterday to describe a coworker's son, and I nearly fell over in a fit of laughter. It's probably been passed on and said for ages, but it was the first time I heard it, and it hit me funny at that particular time. ;)

[Gracie]

Originally posted by SandyM
Someone said "He's not the sharpest knife in the drawer"

Apparently they say that in the restaurant business, too, because DH has been known to say that a few times!

Loren

[Sarah428]

he's...

not the sharpest knife in the drawer (already mentioned)

not the sharpest pencil/crayon in the box

[Melman]

One of my favorites has always been: not the brightest crayon in the box. :D

[designchick88]

"She's not the brightest bulb on the marquee"

"He's a couple beers short of a six-pack"

[donleyk]

'Not the sharpest tool in the shed'

'Doesn't have both oars in the water'

are the 2 off the top of my head.

I like the short 6 pack one.

[donleyk]

Oh, and 'a couple cards short of a full deck'.

[tamawrite]

...a few fries short of a Happy Meal.

[tbb113]

His elevator doesn't go all the way to the top :)

[badunnin]

... a few grapes short of a fruit salad.

[Laura]

A few tacos short of a combination plate.

[Cookin4Love]

The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead. :p

[Canice]

My dad used to say, "half bubble off plumb".

[Gecko]

a few sandwiches short of a picnic :D

[AndreaU]

... a few sandwiches short of a picnic.

The elevator doesn't go all the way to the top.

[little_bopeep]

You can just look into his eyes and tell there's nobody home.

[Judy K.]

Regional phrase -

One taco short of a combination plate.

[mbrogier]

The engine's running but there's nobody behind the wheel

[SPITFIRE]

...as thick as a whale omelet. ;)

[mom2garret]

Originally posted by SPITFIRE
...as thick as a whale omelet. ;)
<snort>
never heard that one!
Jodi

editing to say I would have contributed but all my saying were taken! :D

[Gecko]

I just remembered another Aussie one.

he/she has a kangeroo loose in the top paddock :D

[KristiB]

A few peas short of a casserole

A few clowns short of a circus

Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

[LongIslandCook]

the lights are on...but nobody's home.

[Veronica]

Dumber than a door knob. . . .

[little_bopeep]

A living box of rocks.

From O Brother Where Art Thou? : Dumber'n a bag o'hammers.

[LaraW]

dumBer than lumber

[Kay Henderson]

Not the sharpest trowel in the bucket

Low band-width

[muriel3002]

A few bricks short of a load....

[syzygy]

The gates are down and the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.

And, here's a list (http://dan.hersam.com/lists/not_bright.html) of over a hundred of 'em! :D

[rosie_one]

dumber than a doorpost


(tangent! I read an interview with Dolly Parton. She was asked if dumb blonde jokes bother her. She replied "No, because I know I'm smart and also, I'm not blonde!" Love that. )

[BarbaraL]

Half a bubble off (referring to a carpenter's level)
One brick short of a load
The lights are on, but nobody's home
Dumber than a box of rocks

[MKSquared]

A few fries short of a Happy Meal.

:D

[CompassRose]

My favourite is "dumb as a bag of hair".

[muriel3002]

Not the sharpest tool in the shed, in fact, they're not even qualified to be the shed.

[Jazzmatazz49]

As a teacher, I really hate this one:

"He rode the short bus to school."

[tamawrite]

Just heard this one from a coworker:

He's got bubble wrap for brains.

[muriel3002]

Originally posted by tamawrite
Just heard this one from a coworker:

He's got bubble wrap for brains.

ROFL :D :D :D