Motivation

[matt]

One of my new years resoultions is to lose weight for myself and a friend. My question is how do you motivate someone without being a nag? I hope to convinve his sister to join us, however, she says it is to hot or cold. Any suggestions thanks
ps Happy New year to all

[BevP]

Well, you're gonna hate my answer and maybe other people will have other ideas but here I go:

In my opinion you can't motivate someone else to lose weight and not be a nag. You can be supportive of THEIR decision to exercise or eat right. You can make yourself available as a workout buddy but only if you're willing to go at her fitness level. If you're fit and she is unfit your aerobic levels are different and walking or running together may be the worst thing you can do. Whenever my DH and I exercise together (which is seldom) we work hard to find a compromise. If I'm on roller blades, he gets a good run. There's no way we can run or walk together and both be aerobic. I'd be above zone and he'd be below.

What you can do is support her. Tell her you like her whatever her size. If she needs to lose weight for health reasons then point out that you care for her health. But, honestly, the last thing she needs to hear is yet another person telling her she needs to lose weight. It's up to her to lose weight. SHE has to decide to lose weight and ONLY for herself. When she's ready, she'll find ways around the cold or heat. That is when you can be helpful.

Good luck on your weight loss. This is a great place to get motivation. I hope your friend decides to join you because it sounds like you'd be a big help.

[Laura]

Maybe one way is to start doing athletic activities together. Try a new sport together (my goal is learning how to rollerblade), kickboxing whatever. I often use the approach that I don't want to be the only geek in the class so I need someone to go with me.

[food girl]

I just wanted to say that I agree with BevP.
There are 3 stages of lifestyle change
1. Recognizing that you need to change
2. Contemplating change
3. Taking steps to make those changes

You can't force someone ahead, Lord knows that I have tried. Now I just try to assess where people are and get them to THINK about changing. I mainly use this on my friends who smoke, trying to get them to imagine not smoking...

Good luck!
Lisa

[SusieO]

The motivation to eat right and exercise really needs to be intrinsic to be successful. That is, you and your friend each have to want to do this for yourselves, and his sister will have to want it, too, before she will be able to join you.

That's great that you have the support of a friend to get you exercising and eating right. Maybe when his sister sees your results, that will be the motivation she needs.

Best of luck to you in this endeavor!