October Wobblers [Archive] - CookingLight.com Community

gertdog

10-02-2006, 08:13 AM

I think we're officially joining the wobblers thread this month, so I'll give our stats:

Me: Stephanie, 35
DH: Jason, 33
DS: Ryan, who will be one year old on 10/11!!!

Jen, I don't have any advice on the diarrhea but I hope Saskia feels better soon!

We had a whirlwind weekend here. My grandmother is ill (end-of-life hospice care) and I'd decided to make a 48-hour trip to CA to see her. I'd made arrangements for Ryan to go to daycare on Friday so DH wouldn't have to miss work. But on Thursday Ryan woke up cranky and feverish, and by noon his fever was up to 102.9. We were in the doctor's office by 1:00 and his doctor determined that not only did his double ear infection from 2 weeks ago not clear up, it was worse. Poor Ryan. :( So they put him on a course of stronger antibiotics- they're concerned about the infection spreading to the bone (mastoiditis). I cannot tell you how horrible I felt- my normally active boy just spent the day huddled against my chest. After much discussion DH and I decided that I would still go to CA to see my grandma on Friday, and DH would stay home with Ryan. I cried the whole way to CA because I felt so guilty. As soon as I got off the plane I called and was so relieved to hear that Ryan was feeling much better and playing etc. It was all I could do last night when I got home at 2 AM not to wake him so I could hug him and cuddle him! Today he seems to feel just fine- I so hope the infection clears up this time.

In happy news, he's taken a few tentative steps and can stand on his own for several seconds at a time. He climbs on everything- this morning I had to stop him from going over the back of the armchair after he climbed over the ottoman and into the seat.

He's also enjoying talking to my mom on the phone- it's very funny. All he says is "ba" but he says it at all the appropriate times in the conversation. My mom says "Hi Ryan!" and he says "ba." She asks "What did you do today?" and he says "ba." It cracks me up.

DanaSD

10-02-2006, 09:34 AM

In happy news, he's taken a few tentative steps and can stand on his own for several seconds at a time. He climbs on everything- this morning I had to stop him from going over the back of the armchair after he climbed over the ottoman and into the seat.

We're not quite ready to join the wobblers thread as Brendan is 9 months and fits in more with the scooters except for his mobility. He's is all over the place.

Stephanie - Brendan is starting to do this and its scaring me. We have a section sofa and one side of it is against a railing that is open to the downstairs. I'm afraid he's going to go right over the top and fall to the first floor. DH and I talked about it and I think we're going to put up a piece or wood or a screen - its going to look stupid but its better to be safe. Now I'm wishing we didn't buy the sectional (cost over $4000, :mad: ) but the way the room is designed you have to put at least a sofa against the railing (on its side arm, sorry hard to follow).

We decided to see if Brendan could crawl up the stairs this weekend - we put him down and he went all the way to the top!

Question for the wobbler/toddler moms - how long did it take for your kids to go from cruising to walking without holding on? Brendan started cruising along the sofa over a month ago. He has made progress and can go along the entire sofa, can hold on with just one hand, and can also walk along the wall but he hasn't let go yet. Is there anything we can do to encourage him? We have some walker toys but he's not interested in them. He did take 3 steps with one this weekend but thats it.

greta

10-02-2006, 10:54 AM

dana,
take it from a mom with two boys who started walking fully by 11 mos: don't encourage it! ;)

saif turned 11 mos on 9/21 and started walking that week. he had been taking steps here and there thru his 10th month, but just decided that 11 mos was too old to be crawling. :rolleyes:

he now carries full sized basketballs and volleyballs while he's walking. it's crazy.

and stephanie, we REALLY need to get the boys together. i've got climbers too! (i'm sorry about the ear infection and your grandmother)

i've transitioned saif to whole milk...i know they say to wait until 12 mos, but he was already eating dairy based foods and tolerated them well. so, no more formula!!!

jen, i was going to say the same thing as lisa---may be saskia is teething? or may be she just cought a little bug. just keep hydrating and make sure she's wetting her diapers.

greta

DanaSD

10-02-2006, 11:23 AM

dana,
take it from a mom with two boys who started walking fully by 11 mos: don't encourage it! ;)
greta

yes, some days I feel this way - its hard enough to keep up with him crawling. This may sound a little silly but I want him to be able to walk for Halloween so that it will be easier to take him out in his costume - he's just so cute in his dinosaur costume. But since thats a month away, its likely he'll be walking by then and if not he crawls around in it just fine.

zippy478

10-03-2006, 08:43 AM

Hard to believe that DS is almost 2. Sigh. It really does go fast. In the meantime, I'm planning his bday/Halloween party now. As far as his friends from daycare, I'm only going to invite the ones that I know the parents, too. I'll send something that day to have a little bday party with his friends. That way, no obligations are felt on the part of parents that don't really know him/us. Any ideas for what I can send the day of to the daycare? I'm going to ask what's acceptable, too.

And, any ideas for the party itself are appreciated. There will be a variety of people there as DH & I both love to throw parties/entertain so some will have kids, others won't. The kids will range in age with the oldest probably about 12 or 13. I don't want to do anything too involved/expensive/crafty but I was thinking maybe coming up with one idea for the kids to stay entertained with - more because the weather will be touchy at that point so I can't guarantee that they will be able to go outside or into the bouncey house.

Jen - how is Saskia feeling? Hopefully she has gotten over whatever bug she may be carrying. One thing that I've been told when DS has any kind of tummy issue like that is to limit the amount of juice but keep giving water/milk. The juice usually speeds things up where the milk/water will keep her hydrated without adding to the issue. Hopefully she's feeling better though!

Stephanie - so sorry to hear about your grandmother but glad that you were able to make the trip. Ryan sounds like a lot of fun and a climber, too - hope the ear infections have cleared up.

Dana - does he walk while holding onto your hands? Maybe you can do that when Halloween comes around?

In our world, DS is starting to form sentences to a certain extent. If I ask him if he wants something to eat, he'll say something to eat. I can't remember what the other one was but he is starting to string words together. So much fun they are at this age. And, he's finally adjusting to daycare. Two days this week with no tears/crying when I left. Ironically, it makes me a little sad but I am glad that he is adjusting.

Maura :)

mgs

10-03-2006, 10:13 AM

Me: Meg 36 on friday!
DH: Joe
DS: PJ 14months

I was briefly on the new moms thread about a year ago but we had a VERY rough first 8 months and needed so much support I needed to see people in real life. PJ had/has reflux which made sleep quite - interesting? - and he is a high energy big personality kid.

So here we are. I am actually really interested in hearing from mom's with boys and some experienced moms with boys. My friends have all girls and my brother was such a laid back baby/kid/teen/adult i don't really have a lot of help or advice coming my way. My son has a huge personality and is usually happy. But he is already throwing huge temper tantrums. He is a major explorer and is really hard to settle/tame. I don't necessarily want to tame him, but at the same time I would like if we could sit still for a few seconds to learn some things like colors, numbers, words. All of our girlfriends are so much more calm, will do what they are asked. If I ask PJ to do something he literally gives me a sarcastic look similar to this :rolleyes: :eek: :D I am just slightly exaggerating. I have figured out he is in love with texture and people. I think all of this is absolutely positive, but he is still a baby and it is trouble getting him to be gentle with other babies.

Oh I don't know what I am really wanting from you all, maybe just some - this is what I did/do when my son/daughter was that way. :confused:

Jen - for the diarrhea - I think you should consider it could be a molar. Is he otherwise feeling fine? Is he feeling lousy? then it might be a virus. with babies a virus will maifest it a lot of the time as diarrhea. Sorry he isn't feeling well. You can try to bulk him up with fiber to prevent such watery stools. Humm flakey? I wonder what that means?? :D

Thanks for any advice you can offer!

RebeccaT

10-03-2006, 12:28 PM

Me: Rebecca
DH: Charles
DD: Julia, 15 months

Not much to report on here, just figured I should join the thread a little earlier than last month! Julia is still not walking, but I am trying to be zen about it - she will do it when the time is right. <sigh> I am not very successful in my zen-ness, though, and I feel the need to explain her to everyone. It's just that everyone who sees her, friends and strangers alike, assume b/c of her age that she's running around and doing toddler stuff, and she's not, and I feel like people will then assume there's something wrong with her. I don't know how to stop feeling like this!!! :o :o :(

However, she is doing SO well with her eating and her fine motor skills. She has really gotten the hang of her spoon (although sometimes I have to load it up for her, since scooping can be hard depending on the food). She also has these big beads that snap together, and she can now snap the little stumpy thing into the hole of the next bead... this is amazing to me because of the control it requires to put something really pretty small into a pretty small hole.

ETA: Here is a link to the beads. This is such a great toy! http://www.amazon.com/Snap-Beads-By-EdushapeTM-Edushape/dp/B00020XJ5G

She's also singing a lot. Love that. :D

Jen, I really hope that Saskia's tummy bug or whatever it was has started to clear up. We get some very interesting diaper contents from time to time lately, and it's really hard to know why! I am with you on that!

Welcome to all the moms of new wobblers! mgs, I wish I had advice for you on PJ. Hang in there!

DanaSD

10-03-2006, 12:43 PM

Meg - sounds like your son is similar to mine. He's only 9 months (I post on the scooters board mostly) so for now he's just a very active kid but I'm sure we'll be dealing with some tantrums soon. We too have a lot of friends with either mellow boys or girls. No advice to offer, since Brendan is still much younger. We go to a weekly playgroup and he grabs away toys and pulls hair - for now, I just tell him no and remove him from the situation. He's too young to understand so for now I think thats the best thing. Also, I try to give him as much room to romp around in to get some of his engery out and take him to the park and gymboree.

mgs

10-03-2006, 02:46 PM

Rebecca - I know many babies that didn't walk until 14-15 months and one boy that sounds an awful lot like your daughter - and he started walking at 16 months. Didn't even try before that. Started with those push toys maybe only a week or so before walking. His mother said he finally realized he could carry things from one place to another and that is what motivated him. She just sat back and let it happen - but then again she was 8 months pg so what else could she do? One good thing is that he didnt' have those balance or perception issues that babies who walk early do...... PJ took first steps at 12months but only just recently started being a full time walker. It takes time.

Dana - thanks for the support - I think I posted to you on a toy thread- I used to live in Peoria! Small CL world, huh?

Meg

DanaSD

10-03-2006, 03:01 PM

yup that was me. Too bad you don't still live here - we could get the boys together and they could romp (I'm always worried that mothers of mellow babies will get upset by Brendan's level of activity).

magdon

10-03-2006, 03:57 PM

oops, meant to be looking at the scooters page but then I saw Meg's question about boys. DS1 (2.9 months now) is a runner and in general quite active. Definitely take him outside but I also found that playgroups with slightly older kids were good. He seems to have a pretty good notion of who is bigger than him and generally won't bonk them. Or if he does they can certainly hold their own. At the very least their parents will probably understand better what you are going through.

DS2 (7months) is showing every sign of taking after big bro so we'll probably be back here soon!

magdon

10-03-2006, 04:46 PM

That makes it sound like I let him run wild doesnt' it? Of course if he does steal a toy or whatever other toddler behavior he decides to indulge in, I tell him no,etc. It's just that I have to do it less when he's with older kids.

Does he play with trucks? maybe you could work colors & numbers into that?

but I agree it is frustrating to have a boy that won't sit still when your friends have girls that do what they are told.

mgs

10-03-2006, 05:22 PM

Magdon - thanks - sounds like you have been there. I have to admit, I don't say no to things nearly as much as other mom's b/c his personality just simply won't allow it. I am sure it sounds like I am a total push over, but just like when he was a baby with reflux, you just don't understand until you have a baby like that. He is a very tactile learner for sure so I can take advantage of that. He does love to be outside. In fact that brings on a whole new tantrum, unfortuntately.......when it is time to go in. OR worse when someone leaves through a door and he sees it, and we aren't leaving. He throws a fit and wants to go out. It is horrible. :o We were at Macy's the other day and everytime we passed a door to the parking lot he would point and freak out!

PJ does have a wonderful personality it is just 'out there'. I mean everyone knows when PJ has arrived to play groups. He is loud, laughing and smiling all the time. Loves people and squeals for joy all the time. BUT b/c of this big personality he, at times, slaps other kids - out of excitment - and scares other kids with his big voice. :( He is always the kid in the middle of the circle dancing and squealing while everyone else is holding hands singing. Getting a visual? :D

I do go to mixed groups, but I tend to hang with the moms who have kids our age. I need to find some groups full of boys. I just got back from a walk w/a friend and our babies. She has a mellow girl. I had to cut the walk short b/c PJ just couldn't handle sitting still that long - granted we had been walking an hour already. She was going to continue and the girl was just looking at the scenery! Holy cow.

Ok I have gone on long enough about him, I just don't want to be the kid/mom combo that walks into the playgroup and have everyone cringe......... The advice I have gotten is to do just what Magdon said. Apologize and redirect. The worst thing you can do is ignore it - mostly so the other mom's won't hate you!

Dana I totally wish we could hang out! Our boys would get along great.

We are moving to SF in July.....oh Magdon???? Did I scare you away?

Meg

lisas3575

10-03-2006, 06:02 PM

Stephanie, how's your grandma??

I hope all of us scooters taking over the thread didn't scare off the usual wobbler posters. :o

jphilg

10-03-2006, 06:15 PM

Thanks for all of the thoughts on Saskia's poo issues. She continues to have 4-5 loose stools per day, and tonight she had a mild fever (101.6). I'm going to continue to monitor her temperature, and call the pediatrician in the morning if it hasn't come down. According to my baby bible, it sounds like she picked up an enterovirus, which is common and not a big deal, but I am worried about her dehydrating. She's drinking lots of water, but her appetite is off and she's been really irritable. And we are on day 5 of of diarrhea, so I think it's time to call the doc.

mgs, I have a (generally....but not this week) rambunctious 14 month old, too, so I know where you are coming from. Saskia's a bit of a bruiser; she's out there scrapping in the mud with the boys in her Hanna Anderson dresses. I, too, have found that she's much happier playing with slightly older kids. And I know what you mean about the attention span. But my take on the whole "learning letters and numbers" thing is that I really believe kids learn through play. You can do drills and get them to spit back letters and numbers, but I don't know that it does much for them developmentally. I think songs, books, and your speech patterns will slowly reinforce these concepts with them ("Saskia, please bring me your red shoes! We need two shoes to go outside"). Your son will learn his letters and numbers from being a kid in a world full of songs about letters, color-matching games, etc....I apologize if I misunderstand what your plan is, but I don't think that even the most mellow kid particular benefits from being drilled by his parents (at 14 months) on such things. Better to let them play, and I bet you'll be suprised at how quickly these concepts pop out.

Ok....I'm off to bed. Tomorrow is my big anatomical scan ultrasound for #2! I'm hoping slightly for a girl; DH is hoping slightly for a boy, but we are both going to be thrilled with a clean bill of heath, regardless of the sex.

EmilyK

10-03-2006, 06:32 PM

I'm going to regurgitate what I just posted on the DVD exercise thread, as I'm getting pretty tired now: It's been a really REALLY bad week or so at our house. Where to start... DS got a fever of 102.2 on Friday and gradually got worse until we took him to Urgent Care at 7:30 Saturday evening... double ear infection. <sigh> The idiot doctor asked if we're insured... we respond yes... and then we're stuck at the only pharmacy DH's insurance DOESN'T cover (the only one still open at 9:00 pm) and have to pay $100 for an antibiotic. Yes, my baby's health is very important, but I'm struck by the ridiculous fact that I could have been paying $5 for generic amoxicillin for him instead. So, we've had a miserable little guy for several days now. My parents were in town for the weekend, but most of our plans were shot, because we weren't taking Mr. Sick-O out in the windy chilly weather. Last night, DS tripped and smacked his face on the corner edge of my keyboard tray and now has a boo-boo and black eye (thank goodness he didn't pop his eyeball, no exaggeration whatsoever). Today, the stinkin' daycare neglected to give him his pain meds at 12:30 and we had an inconsolable little man for about 1.5 hours tonight. I had to call to find out when they gave it to him, only to find out they never did. Swell. Oh, and to add to it all, the antibiotic he's on give him watery diahrea... massive blowouts. Yuck.

Rebecca, hang in there! I was CONSTANTLY telling people that no, he's not walking yet, yes the dr.'s say he's perfectly normal, etc... it's tiring. You wouldn't believe the explosion of changes that are about to come your way! :) It amazes me how much they start to absorb and change at around the 18 month mark...

Jen, good luck with the u/s tomorrow... let us know how it goes.

Meg, my DS also has a meltdown if he's yelling to go outside and you don't or can't go out at that moment. One thing I found that helps is to "reason" with him in terms he understands. He knows "all done", so when we can't comply and go outside, we tell (and sign) him that we're all done and can't go. Most times, he'll do the sign and go on his way to something else. Of course, I've been known to have the kiddo that doesn't do anything like other kids, so maybe it's a unique thing? :rolleyes: I think something you should keep in mind is that all babies are different... yours has his own ways of learning and understand, as do the other kids. He might be bored out of his mind sitting in circles and going over flashcards... think about how much more interesting the real world is! If you take a moment and look around (in your yard, for instance) from a completely "fresh" perspective, it's a beautiful and complex place with tons of stuff to explore! :)

As far as how he acts with other babies, he's still a baby. He doesn't understand what to do with another baby, other than the fact that that little person is getting WAAAY more attention than anybody else! My own little man (at 18 months) came up to a friend while she was holding her 3.5 month old and bonked the baby on the head with a toy cell phone. The baby was fine, I was horrified and we all went on with our lives. You just explain that's not appropriate behavior and redirect him to something more fun that baby-bonking. ;)

[/book]

Welcome to all the new folks graduating from the Scooter thread... I imagine it'll take a little more than a more active thread to scare away the more "seasoned" wobbler moms. ;)

zippy478

10-04-2006, 06:49 AM

Emily....I really hope your little guy feels better soon and things start to get back to some semblance of normal in your house. Having a sick little one is tough because all you want to do is make them better. Thank goodness he didn't get more seriously hurt when he fell. ((hugs))

Rebecca...I agree with the others. Hang in there and work with her when you can but she will get it on her own at some point. Zachary was about 16 months when he started walking on his own full time. It does get hard to hear people say "they aren't walking yet?" with that tone in their voice but just come up with a stock answer...something like the dr. says she's fine, all babies are different, etc. Or, just ignore/change the subject when it comes up.

Jen - you may want to pick up some pedialtye for Saskia if her appetite is off. For a while last winter, I felt like we should have stock in it! Especially if it's a virus it will just have to work it's way out of her system. Hopefully she feels better soon. ((hugs)) and let us know if she's gonna have a little brother or sister! Good luck today!

mgs - my boy is pretty laid back so I don't have much advice for you but try to find stuff that he can do to burn off the energy. Sounds like he is just so busy learning/exploring and figuring things out and is overwhelmed. I don't use "no" a lot, either. I save it for the really big things (stove, fireplace, etc) because I don't want to overuse it if that makes sense. Diversion is a good tactic at that point. I try to get him outside as much as possible and sometimes he won't want to come back in so I have to bribe him with a bath or juice or something to eat. Many times that works but other times he'll freak out. The thing that I've found with coming back inside is that you have to make it seem like it was his idea as opposed to yanking him off his toys and carrying him in. Not always an easy feat but usually works - especially now that he is getting a little older. It seems like it may just be a phase and honestly, I agree with you to just let him let it out. Kids need the opportunity to be creative and figure things out on their own and my feelings are that if he is not hurting himself or others, let him explore. Obviously, I don't let him play with knives but I do encourage him to play on his own and when we play together, I do what Jen said - orange truck, blue car, etc. Good luck.

Maura :)

valchemist

10-04-2006, 08:02 AM

checking in. I wasn't here last month. but I'm not scared. ;)

I agree about the learning.... I don't think drilling kids is the way to go. I don't think mgs was planning to do that. I think learning through toys is what she is after... you can certainly learn colors, numbers, shapes, and letters with your toys. IF your child wants to sit with toys, that is. for example, blocks, stackers, puzzles.... and books of course. all of these would be great toys for teaching colors/shapes/numbers. but some kids are just really active and aren't that into sitting and building with blocks or stacking, etc. or even into reading books.

kate is extremely active so she hasn't yet (at 15 months) picked up on colors/letters/shapes etc. Julia learned these things between 12 and 14 months, so I guess I initially expected kate to pick them up from play as julia did. well, it hasn't happened yet since kate is much more of a "run around and play" type girl. finally now she is starting to enjoy the books and puzzles and "sitting down" activities more.

she is doing great physically and her vocabulary is taking off. she has at least 75 words, three quarters of which are clearly understood. the others are only understood by me. ;)

she is a fairly good eater and a lousy sleeper.

the best part is that she is really happy and she and her sister are best of friends. :)

that's about it from here.

jen, good luck with the u/s. I was hoping for a girl for #2, too. but of course would have been happy either way.

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid215/ped94f341f76dad9f3e843c46f1b26312/ecdd75ee.jpg

ErinM

10-04-2006, 08:14 AM

Not much to report on here, just figured I should join the thread a little earlier than last month! Julia is still not walking, but I am trying to be zen about it - she will do it when the time is right. <sigh> I am not very successful in my zen-ness, though, and I feel the need to explain her to everyone. It's just that everyone who sees her, friends and strangers alike, assume b/c of her age that she's running around and doing toddler stuff, and she's not, and I feel like people will then assume there's something wrong with her. I don't know how to stop feeling like this!!! :o :o :(

However, she is doing SO well with her eating and her fine motor skills. She has really gotten the hang of her spoon (although sometimes I have to load it up for her, since scooping can be hard depending on the food). She also has these big beads that snap together, and she can now snap the little stumpy thing into the hole of the next bead... this is amazing to me because of the control it requires to put something really pretty small into a pretty small hole.

ETA: Here is a link to the beads. This is such a great toy! http://www.amazon.com/Snap-Beads-By-EdushapeTM-Edushape/dp/B00020XJ5G

She's also singing a lot. Love that. :D

Lurker jumping in here. I know I'm not a mom, but Rebecca try not to worry! I didn't walk until I was well over 2. My mom was actually told by a doctor that I had cerebral palsy, but as a nurse, she was pretty sure he was wrong. Anyway, I eventually walked and I still walk to this day ;) She will when she's ready! Hang in there!

gertdog

10-04-2006, 08:27 AM

Emily, Ryan bonked his forehead at daycare yesterday and now has a goose egg to go with his double ear infection. He and Gavin ought to get together and commiserate.

Jen, hope the u/s goes well!

Lisa, my grandma is doing as well as can be expected. She's comfortable and the hospice workers are wonderful. She probably only has a few weeks left, but she is at peace with that and the rest of the family is coming to terms with it as well. I'm glad my sister and I were able to get out there and spend time with her.

Dana- Ryan has been cruising almost since the day he started crawling- several months now- and he's just starting to try standing and taking steps on his own now, at 12 months. He has no interest in us holding his hands and helping him "walk"- he pulls away and sits down. He wants to do it himself!

Not much else new here- trying to get my plans together for Ryan's birthday next week. It will just be us plus my mom and sister, and DH's mom and stepdad. We'll do cake and presents after lunch. I just have to figure out what to make for lunch, and which cake recipe to use!

jphilg

10-04-2006, 09:38 AM

It's a boy! Which is great....I just really thought it was a girl because of the sickness and everything. So....off I got to deep-pack all the pink clothes.

gertdog

10-04-2006, 09:54 AM

Congrats, Jen! I've been watching all morning to see your post. :)

lisas3575

10-04-2006, 10:19 AM

Congratulations, Jen! That's so exciting. Saski is going to have a little brother! :)

mgs

10-04-2006, 10:28 AM

Jen congratulations - boys are so fun.

Val - PJ isn't a great sleeper in general - he is in his crib from 7-7 but he is up a lot at night. I don't need to go it, but he is up having a party often. :confused: He is also just a so-so napper. Some days 2 hours but mostly 1hou15min!! I hope they grow out of this soon. I read this statistic once that 83% of moms wish their kids would sleep better.

Maura - thanks for some your ideas! i have to think of somethings to bribe with. He is just so stubborn!

Yes, Val, you are right. I don't really expect PJ to really learn from a book - although he does like picture books so we may be onto something there - as long as the pictures are of outside. :) I am always surprised when he is able to answer a question of mine correctly. - usually he is too stubborn to bother with me. So he is obviously picking up on things.

I took PJ to a baby story time this morning. For babies 18 months and younger. He clearly needs to be with the older group like everyone mentioned. He walked around the entire time. there was one other girl there that is 15 months old that was exactly like PJ - her mom and I were commisterating. We both just can't believe the energy of our kids and how our friends are just in awe of them. I got a sympathy look from one of the Grandmothers there. That is something I actually hate. People feeling sorry for me because my kid is excited to be alive.

Along the same lines, but new topic: I am not a "sit on your hands!" kind of mom. Not a stern disciplinarian at this age. I have friends who are like that and as the kids get older I can see that they won't be playing together much longer and neither will we (the parents) Anyone else experience that? Do different parenting styles often disrupt a relationship if you both have kids the same age? We seem to disagree and have these contrary conversations a lot over things like discipline. For example she thinks a naughty chair can be used at 18 months. I am not sure that should really be used until they can understand consequences. More like 2.5-3 years?

Maybe I need a toddler parenting book. :rolleyes:

Meg

mst

10-04-2006, 11:24 AM

Jen! A boy. How wonderful. Congrats.

Meg- I hear you! I definately see some relationships changing with our friends, due to parenting styles. I just can't stand when other people discipline Ilyssa. First off, she is a baby- she doesn't really misbehave. Second, my child- my discipline. One of the moms in playgroup is always discipling the other kids and it makes me nuts. I think this will be my hot button issue. We also have friends that believe in hitting their kids, and that is hard for us.

Rebecca- Ilyssa has been slow with lots of things. Right now, we are having a physical therapist come because Ilyssa is 10.5 months, and not even doing pre-crawling things. It is hard to be behind the curve. For us, I am also a little sad everytime we go somewhere like the supermarket, and they offer Ilyssa a piece of cheese (she is allergic to dairy). I feel like everyone thinks I am a bad mom for not giving Ilyssa cheese in the supermarket, but I also don't think that the woman at the deli wants to hear about Ilyssa's allergies. It happens to us at restaurants too. It is hard when you feel like others are judging you or your child.

Couperine

10-04-2006, 01:31 PM

What great news Jen!

Mgs - my 17mo son Ethan is a blazing ball of energy - from the moment he wakes until he naps or sleeps, he is going at warp-speed. I have found that he is responding really well to being warned that the activity he is doing will be done soon i.e. we're are the park - I tell him we have to go bye-bye in 5 minutes and let him continue onward. A few minutes later I say we're going in 2 minutes, and finally a few minutes after that, I say it's time to go bye-bye.

This technique works for many many things, and it works so well for Ethan. He would pitch a fit if I just said ok time to go, but giving him that transition time helps. When we read books before napping/sleeping, I always tell him when he has picked the last book he's going to read, and he's fine with stopping.

We also have issues at the library lapsit - he used to sit when he couldn't crawl, but since then he's always trying to move around. I've talked with the lovely lady who leads our group about whether or not Ethan is too distracting, but she would rather him interact and move around in this group rather than whine and fuss in the older group who have to sit the entire time. There are other kids who have problems sitting for a while, and they eventually reach a point where they can do a sitting storytime too. We're just not there yet, but I can see that we will get there.

I just have to share Ethan's latest accomplishment. He's drinking from a regular cup at meals - we started working on it two weeks ago when I was reading about 18mo developmental milestones and realized that was the only one I had never even worked on. It's certainly messier than a sippy cup, and it definitely requires more attention, but I'm so proud of him.

Here's my guy-
http://img446.imageshack.us/img446/821/ethanpointingpw3.jpg

Nancy

fancyn

10-04-2006, 02:59 PM

Holy Cow - 4 days into the month and I'm 20+ posts behind! :eek: Glad to see this thread active again! ;)

Me: Nancy, 27
DH: 34
DS: Nicholas, 20 mos.

Lets see, what's new with us....My headaches are finally undercontrol, well for the most part :rolleyes: , and life was slowly getting back to normal - until DH started the night shifts for the next 2 weeks. Doesn't seem to be affect DS, TG! I just can't sleep while he's gone - I'm going to be walking zombie by the time it's over.

Onto Nicholas. Oh how he's such a toddler now! He's speaking in sentences 90% of the time now and I couldn't even tell you how many words he knows. The other day I had a friend over, and I asked DS if he remembered her name. He said "Brooke, my girlfriend." I about fell over! He's knows all his colors and we're working on counting. He's also starting to identify letters and numbers. Sheesh this is going fast!!

In regards to discipline, I do what Nancy does and give him time limits, like a countdown. Also, if he's doing something he's not supposed to, I use a stern voice and count to three. Most of the time I never get passed two, but if I do, it's either time out, toy taken away, etc. He's so funny now, and it actually hurts my feelings, but if he's doing something he clearly knows he's not supposed to and I catch him - he puts himself in time out. :o WE DON'T DO TIME OUT HARDLY AT ALL!!! :confused: He really is very well behaved.

MY ABRIDGED PERSONALS:

Congrats Jen!! Little boys are so much fun! IMHO, very different than girls, in a good way of course. Is Saskia better today?

Stephanie - I'm sorry to hear of your grandmother. OT, is Ryan feeling better?

Rebecca, I wouldn't worry about Julia's walking at all. And even though it's totally natural to worry about her and what other people think, try not to! You know you're a great parent!

Emily, What a rough week you've had. Hope Gavin is feeling better today!

Val, your girls are adorable! You can tell they are BFs.

Nancy, What a great shot of Ethan - he's looks so happy!

Now it's time for mine! :D
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid216/p4b6c13fac8be741b116806775e4f6c7c/ecae06d2.jpg http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid216/p7eb76b60e590f06ab83b09a7ecfe6638/ecae0659.jpg

buffygirl

10-06-2006, 07:14 PM

Hi everyone,

I'm late checking in this month. We've had a horrible time with illnes in our household, thank goodness Rex has been well. Both DH and I contracted a bacterial stomach thing and have been sick for close to a week. We are both on very strong antibiotics that make us feel awful. My parents have been in Europe so we've had to depend on MIL to help out. Thank goodness she is a wonderful helper! I owe her big time. I've felt extremely guilty though b/c I haven't been able to do much for Rex. Mommy guilt is awful!

Rex is doing well. He's walking pretty well now, but alternates between walking and crawling. His vocabulary is really taking off as well. He probably says about 20 words that I recognize.

He has also started having mini tantrums when he doesn't get exactly what he wants :o After a week of trying to sooth him each time and that not really helping, I've found that if we ignore him, he stops after 20-30 seconds. At school they've called him "strong willed". Help! :p Thank goodness he is generally peaceful.

Welcome to those joining us!!!

Kim

magdon

10-06-2006, 09:24 PM

Are you really moving here meg? Be sure to let me know closer to the date and I can let you know all the hot toddler hangout places (including free playgroups that are fabulous for burning off toddler boy energy).

back to lurking.

TerriS

10-07-2006, 01:27 PM

Hey all!
Caroline is 15 months now.
Rebecca! I am so right there with you. Caroline has taken some first steps, but is not even close to actually walking. And, if it makes you feel better, she is still an incredibly picky eater (we had a slight turnaround a few weeks ago and then regressed to preferring Cheerios and goldfish), not even close to feeding herself with a spoon, and doesn't sing. She does, um, give high fives, say "hi" and "shoes" (she's had other words, these are the current favorites), done a teeny bit of sign language, and is generally the happiest, most pleasant, easygoing baby you ever met. I worry consantly because it feels like every toddler I meet is "ahead" of her, but then I tell myself it's not a freaking race. Zen, right?

Life is busy...work is particularly insane right now and I am essentially doing two full time jobs. Just got back from a short trip to California where my family is which was a great time.

Jen! OMG! A boy! I'm so happy for you!

Here's my sweet pea...I love her curly red hair.
http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6ce25b3127cce8db557a3ae0700000036108AbN3LJi5cM2

mgs

10-08-2006, 08:52 AM

We are actually moving to SF, but dont know what area. My husband will be doing a fellowship at UCSF so we want to be close to there. We will go down to one car, so if he can walk/ride/Vespa to work it will be best. I also will need to upgrade my stroller - I want a lightweight one with a big bucket/basket. Any rec's? We are thinking of asking for one for Christmas so it could be a nice one if DH's parents get if for us :p

We are in the midst of dropping a nap and it hasn't been pretty. He was never a great napper, and just when he was doing 2 decent naps he started to revert back to 2 short naps. So now I am making the transition and some days he will sleep 2+ hours and others days (most) he'll only do 1hour20min. NOt enough to get through the day. He does go to bed early - usually does a 7-7 night but lately I have been putting him down by 630 b/c it has gotten so bad with the napping. And he will usually do a 12hour night, but then he is waking earlier in the morning = it is usually pretty bad. I can get him to do a cat nap in the late afternoon, but then bed time is really messed up so I prefer not to go there. I know I should be lucky that he usually sleeps well at night, well I guess good enough that he doesn't need my intervention at night anyway. Anyway, I guess just wondering if anyone else had a rough transition? going through the transition? He is 14 months old.

thanks to every one for your thoughts on handling my crazy boy. I was looking at the official definition of spirited child (from the book Raising a Spirited Child) and I guess we aren't there.......but he is just pretty crazy compared to all his friends. Still looking into getting a toddler parenting book, though. :rolleyes:

We had a fun day at the pumkin patch this weekend. PJ has orange hair so it was cute seeing him with the pumpkins. I don't know how to attach pics, but just believe me when I say he is the cutest!! :p

Thanks for sharing pictures everyone, your kiddos are so adorable!

Meg

jphilg

10-08-2006, 12:37 PM

Meg! Moving to SF! How incredibly exciting! On the stroller front, my 0.02 is to avoid the MacLarens if you want a big basket. I absolutely love my Mac Techno XT but it's big limitation is the basket. It's smallish, and almost completely inaccessable when DD is in the stroller. I know non-recs aren't that helpful, but Macs are often the "upgrade" stroller when people get rid of the big travel system, and I think the basket issue is downplayed when in fact it is a pretty major design flaw. It doesn't bother me but I tend not to carry much.

Rebecca and Terri, I totally understand your inner conflict....trying to be Zen but then sort of freaking inside. Saskia is walking/running but she's not super verbal at all, and I sometimes wonder about her social skills; she's really a loner sometimes, strolling the perimeter of the playground by herself while all the kids are in the center playing on equipment. I started crying at the playground the other day, I was so sure that she was beginning to manifest signs of autism. But then I came home and researched it and she's not at all showing signs; she's just doing things at her own pace and in her own way. I have no advice because I really feel the internal/external pressure to see my kid somehow rise above the pack. But just like Terri said, I keep reminding myself that it's not a race, and that I am sure that my child is happy.

mgs

10-08-2006, 05:15 PM

Jen thanks - the basket will be a huge issue. And I am so excited about SF. Don't know how we will be able to afford to live there, but it is only 1 year on a fellowship salary. What is a little more debt on top of the med school loans? It is SAN FRACISCO!!!!!! WOO HOO Ok I will stop now. Can you tell I am excited?

And boy oh boy do I know the pressure of seeing your kid compared to other kids. Our community parents center has these questionaires called Ages and Stages (I wish I could find them on-line, but I can't. Only if you want to order mass quantities) and PJ always meets criteria, excels in a few things, not so great in others, but never falls into the danger zone. then we go and hang out with the other kids his age and he just seems behind in a lot of ways except his social skills. He has no problem in that area!! :rolleyes: But he has no real words yet, although an incredible amount of gibberish (well, he does have mama, dada) and is very noisy, and is just starting to follow commands and mimick a lot. I am finding that a lot of this stuff has to do with personality traits and he learns some things quite quickly and not others. He only wants to learn what he is interested in, and too stubborn to worry about the things I am focusing on (colors, words, noises) I mean, he loves it when I say, "Cluck cluck cluck" so he won't/can't say mooo or baaa or even ssssssss for snake but he just started makeing a sort of cluck cluck noise. ??? Uh, why not the easy ones first? How odd.

Also I ran into this woman at the book store that is an early child ed person and she told me that often you will see your child do something once then not again for a few months. Not unusual. She went on to tell me why but I forgot of course......... :o but the important thing to me was that it is normal and I found that PJ is very much like that. He was clapping at 7-8 months then not again until 12??

Ok it is really good to see everyone has fears. It is normal. And remember there is such a wide variation of normal development out there. Every baby is different.

Meg

TerriS

10-08-2006, 05:22 PM

I'm glad to hear the bit about a baby doing something once and then not again. Caroline does so much of that. She took forever to wave, but now hasn't waved in ever. She used to say ball, duck, dog, and a lot more ma-ma-ma, but now it is all hi, shoes, da. and a lot of uh-oh. And heck, she took steps last week and now fights us when we try to get her to do it. Crazy child.

We did the pumpkin patch today too...
http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6ce29b3127cce8dadbad349ee00000016108AbN3LJi5cM2

gertdog

10-08-2006, 05:33 PM

Count Ryan as a one-time waver who just started waving again. And for a few weeks he was imitating "mooo" and "baaaa" sounds when we read to him, but he hasn't done it in a long time.

Meg, I don't know how lightweight you want to go, but I have a Zooper Boogie stroller that I love, and the basket is nice and accessible. It isn't huge, but it's a good size and far more useful than on some of the other lightweights because there's no crossbar blocking your access. I think it's about 15 lbs. and it folds into a standing position (but folds flat, not umbrella-style). So it may be an option, though the flat fold isn't ideal for public transportation if you go that route.

DH left for a business trip this morning and won't be back til Wednesday. Ryan exhausted me today. He is on a book kick- will bring you book after book to read. My voice is about to give out. He had no interest in playing with any of his toys or playing on his own today- it had to be books, in my lap, all day long. I love reading to him but this was a marathon! :rolleyes:

EmilyK

10-08-2006, 06:03 PM

I really need to find a pumpkin place around here.... the kiddos are so cute!

Gavin went to his 18 month appointment on Friday (even though he's 19 months tomorrow). He was 21.5 pounds and 30 inches tall, a little under 5th percentile for both. Since he gained a little over 2 pounds since his 15 month appointment, she declared he's doing excellent. After finding out just how much she eats, she explained that the food he's eating isn't keeping him small, that's just who he is. DH and I are both average in height and weight, so she's going to assume he'll have a spurt at some point.

She asked how many words he says and DH blurted out 20 or so... I thought it was higher, so we've been keeping track of the ones he knows and (if you include the ones that don't really sound like the word, but we know that's what he's saying) he's up to 48 so far!! Wow! This is the little guy who made me worried that he wasn't keeping up with other kids and he's exploded! He learned 3 or 4 just today. He's not really putting them together, like Daddy Bye-bye or anything, but at least he's doing something! My guy was a late walker and talker, so this has been huge for us.

He's been the absolute best little guy all weekend. The entire week last week was spent with his every waking moment stuck on me... he just felt so cruddy. This has been so great having my happy little guy back... we went to the park today and sat on the swing, rode the merry-go-round, and went down the slide!

I've had some interesting comments about Gavin's new haircut, most of them have been positive. MIL e-mailed DH and asked if he wouldn't sit still long enough to get it all cut. :rolleyes: Yep, all my fault and I'm so bad at cutting his hair that I nearly shaved both sides off, put gel on the inside swath and called it a day. <annoyed>

valchemist

10-09-2006, 06:00 AM

I know some people were mentioning time outs earlier. I got this in an email from babycenter.com and I thought I would share.

Thankfully, I never had to use timeouts with julia (age 4 1/2) as she is a very well-behaved girl. I have been very turned off on the use of time outs, but that is because I have seen the mis-use of them more often than not. It looks like they can be effective if used properly (at the right age and for the right reason).

When can I give my baby a time-out?

"At 18 months most children have the ability to understand that with a time-out you're removing them from a particular situation," says Howard Reinstein, a pediatrician in Encino, California and a spokesperson for the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP). But that doesn�t mean it�s an effective discipline technique. Reinstein worries that the original concept of "time out" has been lost, and that parents and caregivers overuse it, especially for children under 3. "Originally a time-out simply meant not responding to a child's negative behavior," says Reinstein. Now it usually involves making the child sit alone in his room or a certain chair for a prescribed amount of time (often one minute for each year of age). But, says Reinstein, "there's no evidence that using the one-minute per year marker works, or that time-outs themselves work, so I would caution parents to use this method of discipline sparingly."

Remember that toddlers are most likely to act out when they're tired, hungry, or sick, so if you're tuned in to your child's moods -- and don't try to grocery shop when it's nap time, for instance -- you may be able to reserve time-outs for situations where your child is endangering himself.

Once your child is around 3 years old, time-outs become more effective. Preschoolers are better able to understand when they've done something wrong and that time-outs are a form of punishment. Here's how the AAP recommends handling a time-out for 3- and 4-year-olds
� Define the behavior you want to stop. Use the time-out when your child is intentionally doing something that you have forbidden.
� Warn your child that if she continues doing what you have asked her not to do, she will be have a time-out.
� Choose a time-out area, ideally a place where there are no toys or distractions.
� When your child engages in the forbidden behavior again, send her immediately to the designated spot for a specified amount of time (say, five minutes). Place a timer or clock nearby so she can watch the time.
� If she screams or cries, reset the timer.
� Be consistent in enforcing the time-out. But when your child observes your rule, praise her for behaving.
Remember that a time-out means simply that you're removing your child from a situation that is either dangerous for her or frustrating for you. The AAP recommends "brief isolation," e.g. one or two minutes, during which your child does not have access to toys or your attention.

mgs

10-09-2006, 06:02 AM

Stephanie I love the Zooper Boogie! I found a NIB w/free shipping on ebay. But, I want it for Christmas. I am going to ask DH's parents for it, I think they'll bite. with the light weight and the nice sized basket it can pretty much replace my full size Peg Perego and my light Chico umbrella stroller that is going to become obsolete here in Cleveland pretty soon where they are predicting snow on Friday. :eek:

The Peg is really good in the sense that is has a huge basket and rides nicely but it is an older model, 2002, and is pretty big/heavy. I also have a jog stroller but they are so hard for me to maneuver because I am short, and they are stiff in general, so I think that one is going to go, as well. So I have to think about replacing 3 strollers and getting into 1. That boogie is sweet. :)

unless I find something else, I think it is on the top of my list.

thanks!

gertdog

10-09-2006, 07:24 AM

Meg- I have to apologize! I gave the wrong model above. What I have is the Zooper Waltz, not the Boogie. The Boogie is heavier- I looked at both and decided to go for lighter weight of the Waltz. But the Waltz does have a nice basket, a huge canopy, an included boot and rain cover, and the flat stand-up fold I mentioned. Sorry to confuse you. :o

There are reviews of just about any stroller brand/model you can think of on the Baby Bargains website- here is the link. http://windsorpeak.com/reviews/items/

I found the reviews helpful when deciding what to buy, especially since no store near me carried any Zooper models, so I couldn't see them in person before ordering online.

lisas3575

10-09-2006, 10:55 AM

Val, thanks for posting that article. Very interesting! I'm starting to think about "discipline", more in the sense of teaching Owen things like "no" and "hot" for situations that can hurt him, and setting some boundaries on behaviour. He's pretty strong willed at 10 months old (I guess, nothing to really compare him to LOL), so I need to figure out what's appropriate. Right now, getting into potentially harmful things (houseplants, fireplace [not on yet, but we do use it for heat], oven, etc.) is a big fun game for him, because he knows that we talk to him and then come get him and put him back away from harm. It's a race, he makes sure we're watching us and goes to item X at warp speed, giggling all the way. Sigh.

What did you wobbler moms look to for advice on setting limits? I know that this topic has a lot of differing opinions! At what age/developmental stage did you start giving consequences of whatever sort?

fancyn

10-09-2006, 11:24 AM

Hi Lisa, I agree you'll get many opinions on that topic but of course I don't think there's a right and wrong way - I decided I'll share mine, as right or wrong it may be. ;) When DS was just first exploring, like you said the fireplace, household plants, etc. I would just give a firm no, and redirect and eventually he just caught on. I do have a wine rack on bottom of my bakers rack that is stocked - it was like a moth to a flame. At my wits end, I thumped his hand followed by a no. Oh how he cried b/c I hurt his feelings! He still doesn't mess with it to this day, but I decided that's not how I wanted to get him to understand. I felt so awful I was crying! After that I started getting down to his level, right in his face so he was looking at me, and give a firm "no, we do not do X", in a very low, serious tone. That worked half the time. :rolleyes:

So having said that, I stuck with redirection until I was sure he could comprehend what I was telling him. I could just tell because you could see the look on their face. He'd give me that onry smile and deliberately do something he wasn't suppose to, like touch the plant. So then he was confined in the kitchen with me for a brief period so he couldn't access the plants. Or when he wouldn't get his way, like into the plant, and throw his milk down on the floor in anger. In that case, the milk went away for a few minutes.

I'm not sure I made myself very clear here, and I'm not sure at exactly what age this happened, probably 11-12 months, but I don't remember for sure :o , time flies by sooo quickly anymore. Good Luck!! :)

mgs

10-09-2006, 11:37 AM

Val we must have been posting at the same time b/c i didn't see your article until now. I am so happy to read it because it really helps to validate what I felt in my heart was true. How can you discipline a child who can't understand the consequence or have an attention span? The article is brief, so I will look into it a bit more. I know the baby whisperer says to take a 'time away' for the little ones under 2 (maybe it was 3) so you kind of remove them from the bad behavior and sit in a quiet room with them for a bit, then you let them back to the play group, for example. I will go to their website and post the information later.

I am interested to hear what things you have observed to make you think time out is misused? I am being a bit dense, but it seems like a pretty harmless punishment to me. Can you give me an example of how it is misused? :confused:

Stephanie - thanks for the heads up. Actually your waltz is the highest rated of the zoopers on that website you sent me to. And it will be a Christmas purchase. it really will mostly be needed for SF.

Right now when I try to discipline PJ (and Lisa I think PJ is very strong willed, too. With nothing to compare...) he seems to still be in the = " if I do this I get a response" mode. GREAT So basically at this time my goal is to make sure he doesn't kill himself or others. That is about as sophisticated as it gets. Actually - just in the past week I have noticed he will start to follow some commands like "lets go to the bathroom to brush your teeth" kind of thing. off he toddles to the bathroom........ So it might be coming along.

Meg

mgs

10-09-2006, 11:50 AM

Interestingly the one on the BW website is from babycenter! It does have a bit more detail, and it also says that 2yo is a little young for time outs. More like 3yo Warning it is long:

What to expect at this age
It's a 2-year-old's job to explore the world around him � and part of that exploration involves testing the boundaries of his world. That means your 2-year-old will gleefully push the limits you impose in an effort to find out what's okay and what's not okay. He's also a creature ruled by emotion, and can turn on a dime from a happy-go-lucky child to a flailing, wailing wild thing.

When your child gets too worked up for his own good, sometimes the best way to help him get a handle on himself is to remove him from whatever sparked the meltdown (or the limits-pushing) in favor of a little quiet time, better known as a time-out. Though many experts, including Penelope Leach, are skeptical about using traditional time-outs with children so young, it's fine to introduce the concept of a cooling-off period now. Six strategies for making the most of time-outs with your child:

What to do
Understand what a time-out is � and isn't. If you don't think of a time-out as punishment, neither will your child, and that's as it should be. Instead, think of it as an opportunity to teach your child how to cope with common frustrations and modify his behavior. Although at times it may require superhuman effort, try not to scold, yell, or speak angrily when you call "time-out" � the point isn't to chastise your child, it's simply to help him switch gears. The goal of a time-out is to defuse and redirect an escalating situation in an unemotional way, and to help your child behave without setting a negative example, the way yelling does.

Don't give formal time-outs before your child is ready for them. Two-year-olds find it hard to sit still, so trying to make your little one stay in one place for a prescribed length of time may well disintegrate into a chase scene: Your child runs away from his time-out spot, delighted with this new game. You catch him, then struggle to make him stay. You threaten, he laughs. You grab, he bolts. Meanwhile, because 2-year-olds have short attention spans, your child forgets why you wanted him to sit still in the first place. Instead of helping him regain his self-control, you find yourself in an escalating power struggle.

That's why traditional time-outs won't work until your child begins to appreciate the need to follow rules (usually around his third birthday). Watch for signs that he understands what's allowed and what's not � if he reminds you of the rules when you break them, chances are he's absorbed that lesson. If, for instance, he catches you doing something you normally wouldn't allow him to � munching potato chips on the sofa, say � he may scold, "You're not supposed to do that, Mommy." Until that point, though, hold off on time-outs or your child will feel he's being punished but won't understand why.

Meanwhile, try to distinguish between your child's natural inquisitiveness and willful disobedience. Instead of constantly correcting his behavior, childproof your home to reduce the opportunities for mischief, and distract your child to redirect his attention to more suitable activities. Save time-outs for when your child is doing something he knows is wrong and distraction and redirection just aren't working, or when he needs to get a grip on his emotions.

Take time-outs together. Most 2-year-olds just aren't ready for solitary time-outs, so introduce the idea of time-out by taking a "positive" one together. When your 2-year-old gets revved up and borders on losing control, try saying, "Let's take a time-out to read a book until we feel better." Any quiet activity, such as listening to music, lying down, or putting together a simple puzzle will work.

Taking a time-out with you gets your child used to the idea of a cooling-off period. It disrupts the downward spiral of negative behavior while avoiding the battle of wills that a more formal time-out can incite.

Plan ahead. Don't spring time-outs on your child in a burst of frustration � this discipline method works best if it's explained ahead of time. Use simple terms: "When you get too wild or act in a way that Mommy and Daddy don't think is a good idea, I'll call, 'Time-out.' That means you'll sit in this chair for a little while until you can calm yourself down." You may find it helpful to act this out or to use a doll or teddy bear to demonstrate.

Be flexible. With a 2-year-old, your goal is simply to introduce the idea of an enforced break in the action. Such an interruption can be upsetting enough to your hard-charging, egocentric 2-year-old; insisting that he sit in a certain place, in a certain way, for a certain length of time may be too much for him. Instead of marching him to a special "time-out" chair, for instance, consider just having him sit still right where he is � and stay with him if need be. Go easy, too, in determining how long he needs to stay there. (Don't start following the common one-minute-per-year rule until your child is at least 3.) Thirty seconds to a minute is generally enough for a 2-year-old. The period should be long enough to refocus his attention but not so long that he gets frustrated. One idea: Have him sit and recite his ABCs, then redirect him to a different activity.

Don't expect miracles. As you've no doubt discovered, 2-year-olds are notoriously active, willful, and unpredictable. This is normal (though admittedly tough on you), and the only solution is plenty of patience. Testing limits and gauging your reactions � over and over again � is your child's way of establishing a secure understanding of his world. He may repeatedly toss food off the table to establish that gravity continues to exist. He may repeat an action just to make sure it's still "not okay," so consistency is vital.

No single disciplinary approach � including time-outs � will transform your child into an obedient angel. But learning what behaviors are normal (or at least unavoidable!) at this age will help keep your expectations realistic. If, on the other hand, your child is usually pretty compliant and easily redirected, you may be lucky enough never to need time-out. You may also find that using the positive time-out technique � changing the pace to a quieter activity � works well throughout your youngster's childhood.

lisas3575

10-09-2006, 01:40 PM

Thanks, MGS-- could you please post the link where you found that?

mgs

10-09-2006, 03:45 PM

Here you are

http://parentcenter.babycenter.com/refcap/preschooler/pbehavior/63909.html?scid=pcbulletin:20060320:0:0:0

Well Stephanie - i think that the cup holder and snack tray are going to be important to me. I think that means that all zoopers are out :mad: I liked them! Right now we don't have cup holder or snack tray in any of our strollers and I walk a lot around our little village, to the playground for the afternoon, etc and I really miss them. I want big basket, cup holder, and snack tray. I want I want I want!! :)

Anyhoo = the search is on. Now I have DH on board and he wants a Bugaboo. I don't know if I want to go there...........although I will be in San Fran. Hum Have to fit in!!

Meg

valchemist

10-09-2006, 04:07 PM

I am interested to hear what things you have observed to make you think time out is misused? I am being a bit dense, but it seems like a pretty harmless punishment to me. Can you give me an example of how it is misused? :confused:

here are ways I have seen it misused:
- used at too young an age when the kid didn't get it
- not used as cooling off time but instead as a "naughty chair." mom was using it in anger. basically telling the kid you are naughty several times within the course of an hour. becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, maybe?
- used at the drop of a hat (too often, for piddly things) therefore less effective
- the timeouts I have seen are longer than the ones suggested above

DanaSD

10-09-2006, 05:19 PM

(lurking over here from scooters) When Brendan and I took swim lessons this summer, ages 6 month to 3 years, there was a father who was working with her daughter on the various activities we were supposed to practice. One of them was jumping into the pool to the parents arms from the side of the pool - Brendan was too young so we skipped this one but this girl was old enough ( 2 1/2?) and had done it a few times but didn't feel comfortable always doing it. Her father asked her to do it and she didn't want to so he he told her she had to do a time out if she didn't. Seems a little overused - I guess she was doing something wrong because she wouldn't do what she was being asked to but she was still learning and getting used to the pool. She wasn't doing anything that would harm something or someone. She ended up going in timeout (sitting against the fence facing it) and then came back to the pool and jumped in.

TerriS

10-10-2006, 07:40 AM

Re strollers and snack cups/cup holders - we just set up our jogger with this nifty cup holder system I found at Babies R Us. You could probably use that with a Zooper to add a snack cup (which I agree is critical) and cup holder.
http://comfortfirst.com/images/Product/medium/ZM10815.jpg

It comes with two bracket thingies and a bunch of different clips to attach to different parts of the stroller. Very handy.

That being said, I have a Combi that is a rare model that has a cup holder. It is a great stroller for getting around the mall and that sort of thing. I like that it has one bar across the top for steering, has two little cups that are great for holding a sippy and some cheerios, and a decent amount of storage. It is 17 pounds, so not superlight but still pretty light, and folds down pretty small, almost like an umbrella stroller. The only thing I wish it had is bigger, tougher wheels.
http://www.combistrollers.com/ProductImages/268047_claret_savvy_ex.jpg

That being said, I have a friend who lives in SF, I will have to ask her what stroller she has.

gertdog

10-10-2006, 09:43 AM

I have something similar to what Terri posted- a "universal" cupholder and the Zooper also came with a little water bottle holder- it is mesh, not plastic, though, and hangs loose rather than keeping the bottle upright (in other words, it only works for bottles with caps- no open cups). I don't care much about a snack tray (maybe DS just isn't old enough yet that it matters?) but I do like having a cupholder as I take bottled water just about everywhere! I also have some hooks that snap over the handlebar to hold bags, but haven't really used them. I think we travel pretty light- but again, maybe he's just not old enough yet that I've needed more stuff!

Ryan has decided to be a little mimic the past two days. I had a cold last week and still have an occasional cough. If I cough, he coughs. If my cough has three "syllables" (hack-hack-hack) so does his. He thinks this is very funny. I think it's funny too, for the time being!

fancyn

10-10-2006, 10:06 AM

Stephanie, that's too cute about Ryan coughing. :)

Thanks Val and Meg for posting the article. I do feel the need to defend myself, however, because I was the only one who responded to the "discipline" question. When we use time out, as mentioned before rarely, Nicholas totally understands the concept of "taking a break" to compose himself so he can "use his words". IMHO, it works for us. DS's self imposed timeouts are because he knows he needs to get himself together and process his actions. DS may only be 20 months, but his abilities/capabilities are way above the average. And I also want to reinterate how well behaved he is for being such an adventurous, inquitisitive, and impulsive boy. I couldn't have been blessed anymore! :)

Nancy

mgs

10-10-2006, 10:12 AM

Thanks for the stroller tips! Keep them coming! The bugaboos are O-U-T first off they are just plain ugly (IMO) and secondly I am not sure they have any of the features I want! Has the main feature DH wants - FLASHY. :cool:

The snack tray was essential once PJ got to be about a 12 months, I think. They are much more aware of the things around them, and if they have a little snack tray to put cherrios/raisins on that can keep them occupied a little bit if you try to do some shopping in the mall. it is annoying to have DS constantly turning around in the stroller for something to munch on. I have an umbrella combi and I know what you mean about the wheels, Terri. they don't make you feel like you are really stable. I use it mostly for the mall, too. I do a lot of walking around our neighborhood and I am lucky in the sense that we live with in walking distance to the library, playground, grocery store, coffee shop, several restaurants.......so our strollers get a lot of use and i am anticipating they will get the same or more use in SF so that is why I really want a stable/sturdy/convenient one for when we move. I do like that accessory that you posted Terri.

About the discipline thing - Dana's example! OMG punished for not wanting to jump in the water? Was he training an Olympic athelete or something??

I was really surprised to see that time-out was originially intended for a 'rest period' when things were getting out of hand. I really like that idea. Also for the love of God people don't set your kid up for failure! I mean, if you know your kid can't handle the playground, why take him there??? And then he gets in trouble for not behaving. now who's fault is that? I feel like some of the problems kids get into is the parents fault for putting them in a situation where they are doomed from the beginning. Thanks for letting me sort out my feelings! haha

Nancy - just saw your post so I am editing this in - I know the need to defend yourself, but really, no need! Sounds like you and your son are using time-out appropriately. Most kids his age are too young, but certainly not every kid. I do have a good friend that has a daughter that is 15 months that I have NO doubt at 18 months she will be able to understand if she did something wrong. But she is such a good girl she will probably never do anything wrong. :rolleyes: Try having her as a best friend. :o Unfortunately, :mad: my friend doesn't believe me when I say PJ won't get it at that age and I have to defend myself to her!

Stephanie - too cute about the coughing. It is amazing the things they do as toddlers, isn't it?

I am sort of a push over for babies/toddlers. I don't think any of them can do wrong. :p

Meg

RebeccaT

10-10-2006, 01:34 PM

Meg, Thanks for posting that article. I thought it was very interesting. I think that it makes a lot of sense to use time-outs in the way described there for children who are <3 years old. We are starting to have to think about that type of thing... Julia is just starting to test us. Usually we just say No, we don't do that, and then we redirect her. That is hard to do in the high chair, though, since I don't want to take her out if she's not done eating. But her favorite thing to do is drop (or throw!) food off the chair. I say "No!" and she looks at me, smiles this devilish grin, and does it again. My inclination would be to take her down from her high chair, and say snack time/dinner time is over (and if she's done eating, I do that immediately). But if she's still eating, I don't know what to do. I did figure out not to pick the food up off the floor until she's out of her chair, though, because if she saw me lean over to pick something up it just egged her on! So it stays on the floor.

My pediatrician said to look at it this way - if it's something that could hurt herself or others, then use firm discipline (raise voice, firm NO!, etc.) But if it's something that you just don't want them to do, the best way to make it stop at this young age is to stop reacting to it, otherwise it becomes a power struggle "and the kid will always win!" :eek:

TerriS

10-12-2006, 09:20 AM

Another tip, along those lines, that I heard from a colleague is that if the kiddo is trying to get into/do something dangers, instead of saying 'no!', try saying, in a very loud and alarmed voice, DANGER! That way the kiddo learns that there are some things that just really should not be messed with. We haven't really tried this yet, since Caroline is not really inclined to get into things, but I'm keeping it in mind.

And Rebecca, we take her out of the high chair almost as soon as she starts throwing/dropping food. She weighs nearly 28 pounds - she is massive - so it's not like she's going to starve. When she throws, I say very firmly that if she is all done she should put the food down. If she throws again I say "all done!" and we get down. She never acts like she's hungry later or anything like that. We were able to mostly successfully teach her not to throw her sippy in this manner. We also sort of modeled. I'd pick up the sippy, and say "when you're all done, put it down" and show her how to put it down.

zippy478

10-13-2006, 08:26 AM

DS has finally adjusted to the daycare routine. BUT, he doesn't understand that he's allowed to sleep in on the weekends! :eek: Sigh. I'm just glad that it's not as much of a battle in the AM now.

We tried the toddler bed last weekend and he wanted nothing to do with it so we moved the mattress back into his crib and will hopefully try again this weekend. Anyone have any tips on making the transition? I'm not stressing about it but would really like to make the transition before the baby comes in Dec. If not - no biggie - we'll adjust.

Timeouts - we use them BUT we reserve them for very drastic situations. It generally goes like this - he is warned at least three times or more not to do something (hitting is a big thing for him right now) and if he continues to do it, we take him to the "chair" and sit him down. We tell him why he's there and tell him to sit still until we come back in. He isn't there for long - only a minute or two. We use it more as an opportunity to get him to calm down/relax if the other tools such as distraction, removal, etc. don't work. We also don't use it if he is super tired and reacting to that. I guess it's similar to Nancy's use of them. We also reserve NO for drastic situations such as a hot stove or some other dangerous thing. We try to use "don't do X" or "that's not nice." It's tough sometimes but it works for now.

Maura :)

EmilyK

10-14-2006, 03:29 PM

We made it to a pumpkin patch! Well, in a round-about way... we went to a fall festival in a local community which had a petting zoo, pumkin patch, etc. and found a picnic table with about 15 pumpkins on it, with a hand written sign that said "Pumpkin Patch, $5 each". :rolleyes: Okaaaaay... So, we went to the petting "zoo" and the other stuff and then went to a nursery we noticed on the way in, because they had a ton of pumpkins! Here are some pictures I took:

His reaction when he first realized the huge creature in the pen was a cow (they're much smaller in his books :)):
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid216/pd9b49eafe09de776497bd7136e2285d0/ec8825f4.jpg

I thought this one was cute, he ran over to Tigger and was looking up in amazement:
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid216/p032cb17712526a2fc3084e5291c78658/ec881f79.jpg

Pumpkin pictures (he was exhausted by this time, so we were lucky to get any good ones):
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid216/pf6be11451e78721f1008ea1001085083/ec88287a.jpg http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid216/pe2f131c2ded6dd717b9fbe322d901a35/ec882879.jpg

RebeccaT

10-15-2006, 12:44 PM

Great pictures, Emily! Gavin is such a cutie. Sounds like the fall fest was a lot of fun.

We went to the pumpkin patch yesterday, too! Fortunately, it was a relatively cool day so Julia could wear her fun Halloween shirt. :)

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid216/p02b8d0cb094edfaaf90cad2a0944aeaf/ec8465d4.jpg

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid216/p5837c736ebe311d2da26edac7efa5a98/ec846549.jpg

mgs

10-17-2006, 11:29 AM

everyone has such adorable babies!

I am wondering if anyone has a bumbleride flyer? it is pretty well reviewed on the Berkely Parents Network as an Urban Stroller and for a full size stroller they really aren't too expensive. 24 pounds, and come in fun colors. Full size basket and seat fully reclines which is really handly.

Ugh the in-laws are coming for a visit. the first weekend of nov. I am already dreading it. They are simply not baby/kid people but they know they 'should' be involved so they come. they really don't know how to play, are very stiff and awkward in general, then with a rambunctious 15mo running around. And he is soooooooo loud "It just hurts my ears, that's all" :rolleyes: Whatever. He is a great baby. I am not going to stifle him b/c they are old fuddy duddies. I have to keep telling myself that they just aren't kid people, can't relate and that is just who they are. Not that they are bad people. I got that advice on a grandparent thread on the 'other stuff' board so I am going to try to keep it in perspective. wonder why they had 3 children, though. I would have thought they would have stopped at 1 they way the so obviously bristle around infants and mock other adults who like to play/horse around. Anyway I am going to be nice. :o

Meg

ETA: just got back from storytime and one of the mom's had a zooper waltz! she loves it, but says it isn't super light. I loved the look of it. And all the nice extras that come with it. Rain cover, foot boot, etc. keeping it in mind. not sure where they sell them around here.

gertdog

10-23-2006, 08:04 AM

Hey all,

It's been a wild few weeks here. Ryan turned 1, and discovered sugar for the first time, in the form of cake and frosting. We had a little party for him- just my mom, sister, and Jason's mom and stepdad. That was plenty though- he was overwhelmed by the attention, and then very crabby on Monday when he discovered his fan club had gone home. He loved opening presents but he liked the helium balloons the best. We still have a few floating around- he's going to be disappointed when they're gone. He got some neat things- his favorites are the Little Tikes ride-on, a kid-sized armchair, and a "boom box" toy that I thought would be annoying but is actually pretty cute, especially when Ryan dances to the music. Not to worry though, we also got plenty of obnoxious things with flashing lights and sounds. ;)

We also made a little time capsule for him, and asked each of his grandparents to pick something to put in, for Ryan to open when he turns 21. I was really touched by what everyone came up with.

Ryan also started really walking last Friday- look out world!

Here are some photos. Sorry the birthday ones are dark- not sure what was going on with the lighting/camera.

Here he is checking out the cake:

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid217/p6f5c37cb1ea57793373734a82343ae5d/ec635e51.jpg

Enjoying some frosting:

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid217/p9f39ed27e37174839f56e60d61320c32/ec635e3b.jpg

The obligatory pumpkin patch shot :D :

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid217/p9ec27f2c092d7673ae6e618f921ae0ae/ec635e46.jpg

And hanging out with me:

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid217/pf871088b43727cdcc58dfba15fb4ef2d/ec635994.jpg

food girl

10-23-2006, 07:15 PM

What cute pictures! I have got to find a pumpkin patch! Especially since my pumpkin is now housing millions of fruit-flies - ugg, I won't be carving that one!

Maura, do we have the same in-laws? Mine don't seem to even want to be all that involved, they haven't seen Anna since July and that was only because they were driving thru our town on thier way somewhere else, i.e. somewhere "better" :rolleyes:

We have been sick as dogs here, stomach flu, now cold & cough. Anna came home from preschool with her 3rd terrible case of diaper rash. She never had it before she started schoool in August. I have written the teacher a note basically stating the things that I am going to do to help (bigger diapers, extra ointment, no citrus the night before, no snap-crotch shirts to make checking for low-smell dirties easier) and later in the note, I nicely ask them to change her an extra time during the morning and afternoon. Any advice?

We are still having sleep issues here too. She was up crying from 3 - 4:30 last night. On for a minute, off for 10, on for 30 seconds off for 5 minutues ... so we don't rush in because we think it's going to stop, but after awhile it just grates! Saturday night she was running a fever, couldn't breathe and slept for 14 hours without a peep. Who knows what's up.

Happy fall!

Lisa

lisas3575

10-23-2006, 10:09 PM

OMG, Stephanie, Ryan's pumpkin patch photo is the cutest thing ever! :) Made my day. Thanks for posting.

Here's his west coast twin, though Ryan is clearly winning the hair race.
http://www.smoody.com/modules/gallery2//main.php?g2_view=core.DownloadItem&g2_itemId=2947&g2_serialNumber=2

RebeccaT

10-24-2006, 11:53 AM

Lisa and Stephanie, LOVE the pumpkin patch photos! They're precious!

Food girl, I wish I had good advice about the diaper rash. I know that our childcare (Julia goes twice a week) documents how often and the contents of her diaper changes - does yours do that? Are you sure that they aren't changing Anna often enough, or could it be something else? I am sure you are racking your brain - poor girl, it must hurt so much!

I need some suggestions from other moms... have your kids gotten RIDICULOUSLY squirmy and fussy during diaper and clothing changes? Julia wails everytime we put her down on her changing table, and most of the time she keeps wailing until we take her off. She squirms, tries to stand up, flips over, and generally turns a routine diaper change or change from pj's to clothes into a wrestling match. How can I manage this? If I put her on the floor for changes, she still wails because then she wants to get away, and it's even harder for me to control her because there is so much floor space. I tell her NO and put her back on her back, but she just keeps twisting and squriming and we're both exhausted by the time it's over! She doesn't do this at school, and she doesn't do it on changing tables when we're out. Just at home. Ideas?

DanaSD

10-24-2006, 12:00 PM

Brendan has recently starting doing this (at 9 months). He used to be an angel when getting his diaper changed or dressed - now he screams. One thing that helps is giving him something that he really loves and doesn't get to play with or chew often - for him, thats one of his shoes or a cell phone. But then when we're done, we have a battle getting the 'toy' away from him but usually distraction works.

gertdog

10-24-2006, 12:23 PM

Rebecca, we're going through the same thing right now! We hold his shoulders firmly and say NO, but that seems to only be effective for a few seconds. More effective is giving him something interesting to hold- right now that something is the TV remote. :o The buttons keep him occupied and I've learned to be super-quick with the diaper. The other thing that is helping is having everything ready to go before I try to change him. The TV remote or another toy is ready to hand to him, the fresh diaper is out and unfolded, the wipe is ready to use. I even pull off his pants (or unsnap the crotch snaps while he's crawling/toddling around) so that I don't have to do it when he's lying down.

I've also started explaining to him what's going to happen- I'm not sure he really understands what I'm saying, but I'm trying to get in the habit. I tell him it's time for a diaper change, and that I'm going to get everything ready. After I've got the supplies together, I tell him that now he's going to lay down and let Mommy change his diaper, and when we're done, we'll play some more (or whatever it is we're going to do). I also tell him what I'm doing during the change- taking away the old diaper, wiping his bottom, putting on a comfy clean dry diaper. And I tell him he was a good boy and give him a kiss when we're done if he was relatively wiggle-free. Again, not sure he's following any of it, but I figure it can't hurt.

Couperine

10-24-2006, 12:49 PM

We've changed diapers on the floor for a very long time; when Ethan first started giving us grief, we found that giving him toys he liked would keep him entertained while we changed. This worked for a long time with us - when he started to get bored with that, I took some of those now completely outdated baby toys and stuck them with the diapers. He found those distracting for a few weeks as well. Ethan turned 18mo today, and over the past week and a half, he's started running when he sees us get ready to diaper him. It drives me nuts sometimes, especially when he's the one pointing to his diaper telling us to change it. Currently having him point out various parts of his body while I change him keeps him calm sometimes, but there are times when nothing seems to work.

Putting on a Pull-Up instead of a regular diaper also makes a nice change of pace if you know you're doing a wet only diaper. I also go with those after he sits on the potty - it sort of ruins the whole big-boy experience to finish with laying him down for a normal diaper. We're also working on getting him to realize that it's ok to just pull his pants down instead of getting naked on his bottom half for sitting on the potty. It wasn't a big deal when he ran around barefoot all the time, but with the change to cooler weather, he wears shoes for warmth most of the day since he's running inside and outside all day long.

Hope this helps - it seems like we're all feeling your pain on diaper changes. :)

Nancy

jphilg

10-24-2006, 01:00 PM

Squirmy Diaper Changes: That's one fight I've just opted out of. We change Saskia on the guest bed upstairs, and on the couch or floor downstairs. I just keep a drawer of supplies in both rooms, and lay down a blankie of some sort if it's a poopy diaper, just in case. We haven't had any problems with this method, although I have to admit that the guestroom has become Saskia's dressing room. I don't know why I even bother putting her clothes away in her closet anymore; I should just keep a basket in there. Also, I give her something to hold, generally a tube of cream or whatever, and she obsesses on it while I change her.

Not much else to report. I am researching preschools for next fall (you have to get on lists, now, in this area). I had planned to do a co-operative preschool, but then I learned that none of the co-ops I am interested in allow younger siblings (infants) in the classroom in co-op days. Since I'll have such an interloper, I don't think it's going to work; I can't imagine hiring a sitter to go be room mom at my kid's preschool. If I hire I sitter, I'm getting a pedicure! So now I'm looking into regular pre-schools, and there are far fewer options for 2-year olds than with co-ops. It's a little discouraging. Is anyone else thinking of pre-school for their two-year old next fall?

valchemist

10-24-2006, 01:29 PM

We have Julia in a co-op preschool. She was there last year (3 years old when kate was a newborn) and now again this year. I have been the co-oping mom quite a number of times over the past year plus, of course. It is such a fun experience. It is a great time to spend time with your preschooler and be able to see her in her element. It is also fun to have some alone time with her when normally she has to share mommy time with baby #2.

I really wouldn't want to have to bring a baby along and can see why most preschools don't allow it. First, the baby would be a distraction to the other kids (many kids that age love babies and the school's planned activities may be disrupted by the baby). And second, it is kind of hard to really do a good job as a co-oping mom when you have a baby to look after as well.

So on my co-oping days, I get my mom or MIL to watch kate. I know you don't have that luxury, though, Jen. So I see your dilemma. I guess if you can't get reliable help for the baby you should settle for a regular preschool.

RebeccaT

10-24-2006, 01:52 PM

We've been doing the toy thing on the changing table for a long time now; unfortunately, she's somewhat on to us. About half the time it works to give her a book or her comb or her current obsession - the bottle of No More Tangles. The rest of the time she wants to flip and stand and sit and basically do anything to avoid having her bottom lifted in the air by me. I guess I should just grin and bear it, because it sounds like she's being VERY age-appropriate!

Jen and Val, we don't have co-op preschools around here that I know of. How do they work? I have considered doing preschool for Julia next year, as they have one for 2 y.o. at the same place where her Kids Day Out is. But I don't know that I am ready for her to be that structured... they have the kids wear uniforms, for pete's sake! I will likely either keep her in KDO for another year (which is great - I love the teachers, she gets some structure but a lot of play time, and it's either 2 or 3 days a week from 9:30-2:30) or I will seek out a Montessori, as I think she would really benefit from the multi-age environment.

mgs

10-24-2006, 04:33 PM

Diaper changes here have been a fight since about 6 months? Since he could roll over the second you put him down he was on his stomach. For a while I did the change like that, then when the crawling started I crawled after him. When he was pulling up to a stand we did it that way.....Now he can run. It is enough to turn me gray. :p

So once in a while he will lay there if I sing a silly song. Another trick is to sit on the floor with my legs spred and sort of drape him over one leg, he is sort of doing a back bend over my thigh. This keeps him still for a little bit, and he thinks it is funny, but have to move fast. He does try to roll over, but I can keep him pretty well pinned down like this. ;) And to make matters worse he is a pooper. Usually 3-5 times a day :eek: Lovely. I love the idea of just letting him stand. If he would stand still, he just won't. He just runs away. I am already thinking of potty training, it is that bad and has been for a while. I do a warning "PJ we're going to change your diaper" for a few mintues ahead of time, as well.

I bought a little snap on potty seat. I do need a little advice, though. Anyone doing this?

Hope my little knee trick helps.

Meg

valchemist

10-24-2006, 05:53 PM

actually, I have never heard of preschool for 2 year olds, so I guess different areas of the country just do different things.

anyway, even if they did, I wouldn't be ready (and neither would kate!) to do a 2 year old preschool. but obviously every kid is different and I am sure it works great for a lot of kids.

our co-oping preschool works like this. there are no paid staffers.... the parents run the school. the only people who are paid are the full-time teachers. so each parent, in addition to having the co-oping (room mom) duties, is also required to do a "job" for the school. it could be making play-doh, cleaning the dress-up clothes, being the school photographer, or being the one in charge of scheduling all the moms (or dads) for their co-oping days (that happens to be my job). we also have a few other things to do, but that is mainly it. we co-op about 6 times per year. it is fun and a great way to be involved in your kid's education.

jphilg

10-24-2006, 06:01 PM

meg, everything I've read about potty training encourages parents to wait for certain signs that their kiddo is ready: telling you when they have a dirty diaper, lots of interest in watching mom or dad use the toilet, non-wet diapers periodically, even though they are poopy. And anecdotally, friends have had great success potty training in a week or two when they wait for the signs, and disasters (like, 18 months of accidents!) when they push a little and start too early. Most kids aren't ready until 2 or 2.5ish, I understand, even though they might start to show some of the signs around 18 months. Once you decide that your kiddo is ready, there are tons of books.....but most people start by having their kid get comfortable sitting on a small potty (or a potty seat), fully diapered, when they want to go. And then move step-wise from there. GOod luck! I don't see potty training anytime in my near future, so I'll have 2 in diapers for a while. Ick.

Val, I absolutely love the idea of a co-op. I actually went to a co-op when I was a toddler, and have many happy memories of my mom (and dad!) being the co-op parent. I just didn't really think it through....obviously it would be disruptive to have babies in the tot room. And yeah, no local parents, and so far, no other SAHMs to trade times with in my neighborhood. I've heard of setting up a babysitting swap with other moms in the co-op. I just am a little starved for "me time" these days* and am wary of the extra babysitting swap commitment on top of the co-op commitment. So, I don't know.

I found a Montessori preschool/daycare with a 2 year old class, that has a 2 half-day/week option. That might work.

Rebecca, a co-operative nursery school tends to have one teacher per class, plus, on a roatating basis, one of the parents. They tend to be run by a board of parents, as a non-profit. The plusses are the high level of parent involvement, and generally lower cost; the minus is that at least once a month you are "working" in your child's class. Just like everything else, there are good co-ops and bad co-ops; I'd be really suprised if you didn't have any in your area.

*not that pre-school is really going to change that; it'll just give me a little more "Baby #2 time".

mgs

10-25-2006, 11:25 AM

LOL Jen, I don't see it happening for a while, but I am going to - not push - but explore the idea. KWIM? Maybe, just maybe.......... He has a few signs, not all of them. but honestly when I think about my little explorer, I don't see him having time to sit still and potty. A diaper is just so much easier! I have changed his poopy diaper many times and it was dry. I didn't know that was a sign. Interesting.....and he LOVES to play with his willie! :p :rolleyes:

Oh, and on the stroller saga. We were just in toronto for the weekend and we went to a little stroller boutique. They had all the fun/cool strollers to try out. But the shop keeper obviously had no patience for my toddler (how odd is that?) AND basically talked DH and I out of every stroller we looked at. "Oh, that won't work for you" " that is too big for your needs" "You can't put groceries in the basket, they only are supposed to hold 5 pounds" "that one doesn't fold small" Oh-kay.....nice way to get a sale! We have taken to calling it the negativity store. What the heck? We even found a neat accessory to our current stroller called a 'carry you' which is a little pouch for the front stroller bar that she tried to talk us out of getting, telling us it wouldn't work on our current stroller. I had to literally prove it to her by showing her that the display stroller was the one we had at home and the carry you was on it! Hello? How weird. Anyway the thing was a little expensive for a 'snack tray' but it will really be nice. It was $40 cdn.
here's a link to it if anyone is in need - I love it already..
http://www.carryyou.com/cu/Stroller_Accessories/Siena.html

Our local churches do a Mom's Day Out where you can pay $15 to join and you work it once a month. Every monday from 9-1:30 you can drop you toddler off and have the morning off. But the problem is it is your turn once in a while!! :D They don't start until you kid is 2years around here, or else I would be all over it. I have a friend that does it and there are 2 mom's per day and there are 8 kids. It is very very hard work, but so worth it on the days they get to drop off. I have a friend in Richmond, VA who does this, but they do all ages and she is in charge of infants up to 4yo.

Meg

food girl

10-25-2006, 02:17 PM

I don't know of any co-ops around here either. There are lots of preschools for toddlers, starting at 12 months. Anna goes to "preschool" but I think it is pretty loosely structured. In looking at each day's schedule, it looks like lots of free play, snacks and handwashing! Several of my neighbors are teachers at the local Montessori schools. One of them is within walking distance of our house. One neighbor that I particularly like gives me the hard sell all the time! I really need to go check it out.

I finally got her bottom straightened out (Anna's not my neighbor's)! She has some yeast and just one dose of Tinactin made it 100% better. I did have a talk with the teachers about changing her more often and they were really nice and apologetic about the shape she came home in.

We are painting her room this weekend. Does anyone have a good strategy for toy management, other than don't buy so many? I have been looking at basket, bins etc. One of my very pragmatic co-workers told me to just go to Target/walmart and buy big tubs and when they outgrow the toys, you just snap the lid on and you're ready for storage.. or the garage sale. But tubs aren't very CUTE. you know? I have tons of fabric and I could make some covers, but heck, I could just cover some free cardboard boxes and save even more money... right?

Lisa

buffygirl

10-25-2006, 09:12 PM

We struggle with diaper changes here too. It is like wrestling a steer changing little man's didy. Lately I've taken to making crazy faces and speaking in an English accent, he thinks it is hilarious. Seems to distract him long enough to do a quick change.

I've never heard of a co-op preschool. Very interesting concept and a great way to be involved. Rex's school is considered pre-school even at this age. It is at our church and they have a specific ciriculum. We have flash cards we work on each week at home. They have a pretty structured day surprisingly, even at this age. We are happy with it. If we choose the church's private school, he can continue there up through 8th grade.

Rex is doing well. He seems to be putting on some weight finally. No hair though :rolleyes: He already has 10 teeth and is cutting 6 more right now. Teeth is the only area where he is ahead of the curve :p He is developing such a personality and a really cute sense of humor. He is walking pretty well too. Yesterday when I picked him up at school, he wanted to walk to the car instead of me carrying him. Nice break for my aching back, but sad in a way too how fast he is growing up.

Life has been keeping us super busy...I'll try to post a few pics in a bit...

Kim

buffygirl

10-25-2006, 09:31 PM

Some pics...

Rex and Mommy:
http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6ce04b3127cce8e582bbab6af00000016108AYuGjhi1aOc

Oh My!
http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6ce04b3127cce8e582b98b68d00000016108AYuGjhi1aOc

Petting goats at the zoo:
http://im1.shutterfly.com/procserv/47b6ce04b3127cce8e582b84b69100000016108AYuGjhi1aOc

MinEaston

10-26-2006, 11:19 AM

It feels like forever since I've checked in here. Anna is 20 months now :eek: :eek: and doing great. She has an enormous vocabulary in both English and Spanish, and uses words more often than signs these days. In fact, I think "more" is the only sign she makes without using the word also. We had her late 18M wellbaby visit today - no shots, hooray! She's back on the charts for weight, but still small overall (31", 23lbs). The doctor was, as he has been for months, unconcerned. His only new suggestion was 1/2 of a chewable vitamin, and he wants her back for flu shots (they couldn't give them today b/c her last ones were less than 1 year ago).

Both Anna and her parents had a big milestone this past weekend. We left her with my parents overnight on Sunday. I had to be in DC very early Monday morning so my company put me up overnight. DH's birthday was Monday so we made an evening out of it. She was fine, and even slept until 7:30 the next morning for my parents (they're retired and never were early risers so that's the part I was the most worried about!). She was a little confused at the daycare drop-off in the morning but seemed none the worse for wear when I got home (not until 7!) that night. I think I was more affected by it than she was!

My work has picked up in pace somewhat, which is a good thing, but it makes for crazy days and limited BB time. How's everyone else doing?

PS - Remember the going-to-sleep issues a lot of us were struggling with? How's everyone else doing? We seem to have passed that stage; I can now leave Anna in her room before she's fully asleep.

ETA to add a recent picture:
http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid217/p004dd715e285b3c2cd9ec46efcb964e4/ec576c8f.jpg

DanaSD

10-26-2006, 12:27 PM

most lurker here as I follow scooter and wobblers but have a story about friend's of ours (since some of you have light weights)

Their son is 1 day younger than my son (who is 9 1/2 months) and while my son is a chunker, their son is even larger. He weighed 26 pounds at his 9 month checkup. Their daughter, who is 4, only weighs 4 pounds more (30 pounds). She is also finally on the weight charts - she's a thin, very active and healthy child. She has always been behind in weight because she was a premie (like 22 weeks or so) but she no longer has any health issues and is caught up developmentally. But her little brother is going to pass her in weight before he turns 1!

Megan James

10-26-2006, 07:17 PM

So I haven't posted much on this thread but being that my baby is now 1 I think this is where I "belong". She turned 1 yesterday and it was such a great day. I was so happy thinking about the last year and she was so happy from all the cake and icing she ate! She had a party at daycare and then I invitied some neighbors over for cake post dinner. DH was out of town and I knew I was going to feel sad if we didn't have someone to celebrate with.

So question to moms who were pumping at the 1 year mark: Did you keep pumping for a while or did you start supplementing with cow's milk? Rebecca is showing very few signs of weaning but I'm not sure what to do for her daycare milk.

I though it would be a big monumental moment when she had her first cow's milk since she's never had anything to drink but water and breastmilk (well maybe a sip of apple juice...). I had visions of mixing half BM with half whole milk. I bought some whole milk today and decided to try it. She picked up the sippy cup and chugged the whole thing down. So much for having to transition into that one.

http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c279/Rebeccasmom/IMG_2440.jpg

http://i29.photobucket.com/albums/c279/Rebeccasmom/IMG_2426-1.jpg

zippy478

10-27-2006, 07:06 AM

It has been a crazy week here as well. DS is sleeping in his toddler bed now..after a few bumps in the road I think we have been able to make the switch permanently...we've even gotten to the point where we can just sit with him for a few minutes and leave him while he's still awake! Happy day.

The only problem was - the past two mornings, he had woken up around 330/4am screeching. I think he may have fallen out of bed or had a nightmare. Very strange. He slept MUCH better last night but when I heard him fussing at 4am, I got a moment of panic that my so far good night's sleep was going to be interrupted again. :eek: But, that wasn't the case and he fell back to sleep :D :D I know that he ate much better last night both in terms of quality and quantity of food so I think that had something to do with it, too. Plus, he played outside with one of the neighbor kids for a little while. Every little bit helps!

The thing we are battling now is a dry nose. Whenever we clean it out - it bleeds. One thing we are doing this weekend is getting his humidifier hooked up again and I sent saline drops to daycare today so hopefully he cooperates (not likely) and lets them use them.

He still fights haircuts and is now even fighting getting his hair brushed. I'm hoping in the next few weeks that is no longer an issue but we'll see. Any hints on that from anyone?

Hard to believe he is going to be 2 next weekend! We're planning a party for him and it should be a good time.

Hope everyone else is doing well!
Maura :)

MinEaston

10-27-2006, 08:23 AM

So question to moms who were pumping at the 1 year mark: Did you keep pumping for a while or did you start supplementing with cow's milk? Rebecca is showing very few signs of weaning but I'm not sure what to do for her daycare milk.

I though it would be a big monumental moment when she had her first cow's milk since she's never had anything to drink but water and breastmilk (well maybe a sip of apple juice...). I had visions of mixing half BM with half whole milk. I bought some whole milk today and decided to try it. She picked up the sippy cup and chugged the whole thing down. So much for having to transition into that one.

First - Rebecca is beautiful! Happy birthday to her!

Second - I actually started to transition Anna to whole milk at about 11 months, I think, because I was unable to pump enough during the day to keep up. My job just got a lot busier and it was hard to find two times per day to pump, so I gradually went to 1x per day and then none. It looks like you had no issues with the transition, and if she didn't have any adverse reactions it looks like you have your answer! (Our daycare provides whole milk so I don't have to send it, although I send her sippy full in the morning w/organic whole milk).

As for weaning, Anna is 20M and is not showing any signs of giving up her morning and before bed "snuggle" nursing sessions, which so far is fine with me.

gertdog

10-27-2006, 09:31 AM

Great photos of Rex, Anna, and Rebecca!

I though it would be a big monumental moment when she had her first cow's milk since she's never had anything to drink but water and breastmilk (well maybe a sip of apple juice...). I had visions of mixing half BM with half whole milk. I bought some whole milk today and decided to try it. She picked up the sippy cup and chugged the whole thing down. So much for having to transition into that one.

I thought the same thing about transitioning Ryan from formula to milk. The ped said "you might just try offering whole milk and see what he thinks" and sure enough, he sucked it all down. So, no mixing here either! (To be honest I'm delighted- so easy to just pour some milk out of the carton and be done!)

Last month someone was asking about slippers (Dana?)- I wanted to say that the ones from LL Bean are working well for Ryan. They have a wide stretchy cuff rather than an elastic band at the ankle, and they're nice and soft inside.

I bought him some wide shoes at Stride Rite (at the outlet when Ryan wasn't with me). They are fine in length but not wide enough! I hope that the extra-wide fits, otherwise he'll be wearing slippers 24/7 for the foreseeable future. :rolleyes:

MinEaston

10-27-2006, 09:46 AM

I hope that the extra-wide fits, otherwise he'll be wearing slippers 24/7 for the foreseeable future. :rolleyes:

Well, at least the weather is getting colder and the temptation to go outside is lessened :D

DanaSD

10-27-2006, 01:15 PM

Last month someone was asking about slippers (Dana?)- I wanted to say that the ones from LL Bean are working well for Ryan. They have a wide stretchy cuff rather than an elastic band at the ankle, and they're nice and soft inside.

not us as we just starting to occasionally use socks, ;) - otherwise he's barefoot! its been so hot here. But Brendan does have chunky ankles so elastic ones never work. I haven't thought about what we'll keep him in this winter when it does cool down and he's indoors - with just socks, he pulls them off and he's starting to learn how to undo the velcro on his shoes (pedipeds). I usually wear slippers all day so I guess he should too. We're still wearing shorts or just a onsie with no bottoms. Since this is my first winter here I'm not sure how warm of clothes to buy - it does get cold but not below freezing and its mostly in the evening. He gets so hot when he's playing that I think I need to buy him sweatshirts to layer on when we go out but thinner shirts for indoors.

Stride Rite shoes are so expensive - the ones I was looking at were $45-50 and he outgrows everything so fast. The woman at the store said he might grow out of them in 2 months. I did find out today that we have a stride rite outlet so I need to treck over there. I went to Target because they carry a stride right line but they were sold out of everything except for a few pairs of girls shoes.

gertdog

10-27-2006, 01:42 PM

Stride shoes are so expensive - the ones I was looking at were $45-50 and he outgrows everything so fast. The woman at the store said he might grow out of them in 2 months. I did find out today that we have a stride right outlet so I need to treck over there. I went to Target because they carry a stride right line but they were sold out of everything except for a few pairs of girls shoes.

Yeah, not much need for long underwear and fuzzy slippers in Arizona, I guess!

Definitely check out the Stride Rite outlet. The shoes that cost $45 in the regular stores are $26 in the outlet here, and they're the current season styles. They had a really good selection, too.

jphilg

10-27-2006, 02:16 PM

mgs

10-27-2006, 06:01 PM

Our Marshalls always carries Stride Rites for toddlers for 12-14.99/pp. I love it and they have plenty of boys shoes unlike Target that routine has 3 rows of toddler girls shoes and either NONE or 1 option for boys. You know Target makes knock off Robeez, too? I didn't know they have a version of Stride Rite at Target. What is the brand name?

I would say that right past Halloween you will see a dramatic difference in the weather in Phx. I always used Halloween as a guide for when to truly expect a cool down. And probably all you will need is a moderate weight jacket. I had a leather jacket and a lightweight jacket with a fleece lining for when it was really cold. I don't know that I ever really worried about gloves or mittens. I have been in Cleveland now for 4 winters and still forget my coat and mittens sometimes when I am in a hurry because I could always easily live without them in Phx. Old habits die hard. :o If he is a sweaty kid I would say dress him in layers. So you can always strip off the sweatshirt if he is hot in the park.

Come to think of it I think I would go jogging in the winter outside in just shorts and a long sleeved dri-fit shirt in the winter, so that should tell you how cool it gets.

I truly do miss the mild winters. can't wait to get back to the west.

Meg

gertdog

10-28-2006, 07:50 AM

And also consider other options....Stride Rite has a good reputation but they are not the only quality kids shoe purveyors out there. LLBean has a great selection of size 5-up, at reasonable prices. We have a big LLBean near us where they do a very good job of fitting shoes; I know not everyone has that option. Also, Nordstrom has as wide a selection of kids shoes as they do adult shoes, and I bet they could help you find a wide or extra-wide option. As a wide-footed adult, I've had great luck with German shoe manufacturers, and I think the same is true for kids shoes manufactured in Germany. We have a hand-me-down pair of shoes made by elephantan (or something like that) that are almost too wide.

Anyhow, my point is that Stride Rite is not the only place to get quality kids shoes, they jsut spend a lot of money trying to make you think that they are. :p

Jen, thanks for the ideas. I'll have to see if LL Bean carries W or XW shoes- I've been happy with their quality of everything else we've bought there. What I don't want to have to do is lots of returns-by-mail, though, so maybe I'll check at our local Nordstrom first. (Actually, I need to go to Nordstrom anyway- to return a pair of shoes I bought online that are- ahem- not wide enough for my feet! :D )

RebeccaT

10-28-2006, 01:51 PM

Stephanie, another good wide brand is See-Kai-Run. Julia is "wide" at Stride Rite, but See-Kai-Run is too wide for her. (Actually, the proprietor of another local children's shoe store here gets annoyed b/c she thinks that SR tells pretty much everyone that their child has a wide foot, and in her opinion it's just that the child needs a wide size in Stride-Rite, not across the board. She told me that she has so many parents come in telling her to only bother with wide shoes, and then they are surprised to learn that in most other brands their child is a medium. FWIW.)

Anyway, here is an example of See-Kai-Run:
http://www.zappos.com/images/728/7285108/4974-344426-t.jpg

You can get them at Zappos online, and probably in a local children's store for less $$

mgs

10-31-2006, 05:27 AM

Happy Halloween!

PJ is going to be a Lion this year - hand-me-down from my sister. The costume is cute. I think I will put a brown nose and whiskers on him with eye liner. What is everyone else going to be? Are you going to let them have candy? PJ won't, he would never be able to handle that kind of sugar bolus. LOL

Had our first haircut yesterday. It was challenging to say the least. the hairdresser agreed she wouldn't forget him. He wasn't crying or anything, he just won't sit on my lap! he hates to be pinned down, and this was no different. We ended up on the floor, he standing, DH holding his head still (if you can imagine) me holding his cup of water and PJ playing in the water. Don't know how we came up with that to keep him still for 5 min but it worked. Then I had to do a little book reading and he sucked on a pretzel for a few more seconds....it was eventually over and we let him loose in the salon. Anyway, he looks cute, but younger to me!

How was the time change on everyone? PJ is getting up 1 hour early which means he is overtired for his nap which means short nap. I think I might try a 15 m cat nap this morning around 9 and nap at 12 to try to help him adjust. Other than that, no problems. Although I hate a short nap more that a short night. :rolleyes:

Have a good Halloween everyone!

Couperine

10-31-2006, 08:17 AM

I hate daylight savings time with a vengeance - Ethan's mealtimes are now far earlier than I need them to be. It's so hard getting him to hold off until dinner especially. Sleepwise things seem to be going well, so that's one thing to be happy with.

Ethan's going to be a scarecrow for Halloween - I wanted him to be a turtle, but he couldn't stand the puffy costume. I figured the scarecrow costume was close enough to regular clothes for him to feel comfortable, and I made sure to get really soft fabrics for it.

He's really into helping me do things - he loves to sort laundry, push the baskets to the washer, load the washer and dryer, and take clothes out. He now thinks he always needs to put his plate and fork in the sink after meals, and I've been trying to let him help with really simple cooking things like salt sprinkling, pouring dry ingredients, etc. It's really cool to see how much they can do if you let them. Granted, he always wants to see what I'm doing while cooking, but it's worth it. I always think of my poor niece who is now 14 who has been told she's unsafe in the kitchen ever since she let a pot of water boil off and scorched the pot. I never want Ethan to feel useless in the kitchen.

Enough chatter for now - hopefully everyone has a fabulous Halloween!

Nancy