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stefania4
11-30-2006, 04:57 PM
I've worked in/with social services for years, and the holidays are a very busy and important time for agencies as well as families. For whatever it's worth, here are some thoughts:

a) Follow your heart. There are millions of unmet needs, and one of them will "speak" to you. Listen.

b) You are not a terrible person for not being drawn to a specific kind of work. People have told me they couldn't possibly, ever, be a rape crisis counselor in the ER like I was for several years. Know what? The first person who told me that was a hospice nurse, and no matter how much I appreciate the work that hospice does, I couldn't ever do it myself. No big deal.

c) Involving children in volunteer work is a wonderful way to spend time together as a family and share some important lessons about giving, faith (if your family embraces a spiritual path), and gratitude.

But please, please be sure the activity is both age-appropriate and child-appropriate. Just like adults are drawn to specific works, so are children. They will get much more out of the experience if it's something they can relate to. And if you are not familiar with the agency, please check it out before bringing your kids there. I once had to talk a woman out of bringing her 6-year-old to a seriously gritty downtown homeless shelter near the prison and, um, the "ladies of the evening" corridor. That is simply not appropriate. If your kid loves to be outside, then try planting trees or doing a river clean-up. If your child loves art class, then try to find a mural-painting project, and so on.

d) Just because it's not fun to shop for doesn't mean it's not desperately needed! One director told me that a donation of 3 boxes of copy paper was what she was most grateful for one Christmas. Healthcare providers can use pharmacy gift cards, child-focused agencies can always use art supplies and tissues and band-aids, homeless shelters need sheets & towels and detergent, etc.

e) Children need exposure to positive adult males. I can (and do) go change diapers, fix dinners, play, etc. with the special-needs toddlers I volunteer with. But I am one of literally hundreds of women they see, and my husband is one of a handful of men that they interact with. Children who have suffered abuse at the hands of men need repeated positive exposures to men in order to manage their fear and, unfortunately, more men then women are abusers and more women than men work & volunteer with children. I'll step off my soapbox now.

f) Canned food drives are great and are vitally important. Fresh fruits & veggies are quite a treat to those living in institutional situations. Please coordinate with the agency about what to bring, how much, etc. - many have limited refrigerator space.

Feel free to add your own thoughts...

RunnerKim
11-30-2006, 05:22 PM
Stephanie this is all great information and I have a question that maybe you can answer. "Giving trees" are popular in most work places around here - you know a tree put up with tags that have a kids first name, an age and a requested item.

Do the kids themselves actually request those items? Or is a social worker creating the tags from a list of kids names and putting an age appropriate gift on it?

I know the Salvation Army has a tree up and so does a group that collects gifts for kids in foster care.

The reason I ask is that we often end up with toys that my kids don't use (gifts, so they're new, in the box etc.) and it's convenient to donate them to the "giving trees" in my office building (or DH's) but if the kid has truly marked what they'd really like on their tag then I'd hate to be giving a Bob the Builder toy when they wanted Legos. I could find a place to donate the toys that's generic (toys for tots etc.) but I just suspect that they don't actually get kids hopes up by asking them what type of item they'd like and putting it on a tag.


and what do you think of gift cards for teenagers? We did a Fred Meyer (a major local grocery/home store) gift card last year for a teenager feeling they would have access to one easily enough.

Thanks,
Kim

stefania4
11-30-2006, 05:37 PM
Kim, it totally depends on the agency. Generally speaking (and absolutely there are exceptions), the smaller the agency the higher the chance that a specific child's true wishes are expressed on the card. Bear in mind that some of them may have a little guidance from a social worker or other adult, and that's not necessarily a bad thing - the 5-year-old who wants an X-box (or whatever the latest pricey video game thing is) will probably be steered towards something more appropriate and enjoy it plenty.

If you want to buy for a specific child, see if you have a Ronald McDonald house in your area. Another option is to call an elementary school in a low-income area.

I think gift cards for teens are a great idea. Just my $.02.

Kay Henderson
11-30-2006, 05:50 PM
I have experience with groups I belong to providing donations.

Our local women's shelter (which helps battered women and their children escape and rebuild their lives) has a program in which a group adopts a family and provides exactly what they need.

A more traditional charity provides food and gifts for needy families. They have given one of my groups with very specific requests.

The common thread here, whether for a group or an individual, is contacting the organization to see what is really needed.

Kay

donleyk
12-01-2006, 06:28 AM
The common thread here, whether for a group or an individual, is contacting the organization to see what is really needed.

Kay

I love the fact that one can find this information somewhat easily now with the internet. I would not have thought to look for the Faith Mission on line but while searching for local charities came across their website which lists what they need. It's nice and convenient, I don't have to spend a lot of time wondering what they can use and the next time I'm at the store I can pick up some of the items.

My local news channels are pretty good about getting the word out regarding needs in the community although sometimes a little late for me to participate.

essie
12-01-2006, 06:30 PM
My husband found a little 6 year old girl on the Angel Tree here who wanted a coat. So many of the requests were for bikes and DVD players, etc, that he was really touched by a little girl who wanted a coat, so we bought her a coat, and panties and socks and a toy and gloves. It was fun and rewarding to shop for someone who truly needed something, even though we will never see her. I also bought a doll for the Mission of Hope (for Appalachian children) because my grandchildren have so many toys, and I love to buy a doll every year. It is the highlight of my shopping, and I know some little girl is going to love it.