Flylady?

[leightx]

I've known about Flylady (http://www.flylady.net)for probably 5 years now (since my kids were babies), and while I absolutely love her ideas and principals, I can't seem to incorporate them into my own life. I do fine for a few days or a week, and then slowly drift back into my old habits - leaving dishes in the sink, clothes on the bedroom floor, junk mail on the bar. Before I know it, my house looks like a tornado blew through. I would love to be able to have my house "company ready" after a quick 15 minute pickup. Right now it's more like a few days. :o

Does anyone here follow Flylady's advice and actually keep it up? It doesn't count if you were already organized and meticulous to begin with! :p

I seem to have the same issue with weight loss / exercise - I do fantastic for the first month or so, then lose steam and go right back to where I was before I started. :(

[Gumbeaux]

We use her principles. We have her book and subscribe to the Menu Mailer.

[lindrusso]

I'm right there with you Leigh!

I think that a lot of FlyLady's ideas are great, but many are a bit unrealistic.

The key for me - with weight loss and with housekeeping - is to remember that you don't have to do it 100% for you to reap the benefits. Meaning, don't give up completely, even if you're not doing it exactly right.

For example, even if you only hit your hotspots once a week instead of twice a day, you're still benefitting from doing it and it's better than nothing!

What I love from her plan is that remembering that 15 minutes here or there, or even 5, can make a big difference.

So, maybe you're not 15 minutes away from having company over, but you'll still benefit from some routine and less mess. And maybe find a compromise and shoot for being a few hours away from company instead of 15 minutes - that's still better than several days.

The worst thing for me is that I'm not even working full time, the kids are in school and I'm STILL not keeping up with the house very well. :rolleyes:

[TKay]

Ditto what Lindrusso said--almost entirely. I don't keep up with the routines each week, but I do make an effort to put in my 15 minutes of decluttering or taking the trash out and putting away the dishes in the morning. That sort of thing. I find that even though I don't adhere to all the recommendations, FlyLady makes a big difference around my house. I used to be an all or nothing cleaner. I'd put everything away, dust and vacuum, clean the baseboards, blah, blah, blah. Then I'd be completely burned out and do nothing until it was an absolute mess again. I'm so grateful to know I don't have to make it perfect to make it better. My house is much more livable because of it.
I have most definitely fallen off the wagon over the holidays. But you know what? I know that with a few weeks of getting back into my (partial) routine, the house will be (mostly) back in order. And I'll feel better.
It's comforting to know there are other people out there struggling to fly too.

[foodfiend]

Flylady really helped me. The key phrase was "you can't organize clutter". It took a long time but I finally got my place in order. It's not perfect, but at least now I can have people over. Don't try to do everything she says. Just focus on one thing -- when you move to another part of the room, take something with you that isn't in the right place.

[blazedog]

Flylady absolutely saved me -- I do think the original poster isn't getting the gestalt of flylady -- i.e. you are never behind. Her whole point is not to look at the ends as the goal but just to concentrate on the small steps and take pride in doing those -- i.e. her whole idea of the "shiny sink".

Yes yes yes -- you can't organize clutter -- as a pack rat who still has way too much stuff, this is absolutely key -- the more stuff one has the more difficult it is -- things require maintenance -- from the obvious like the difficulty of vacuuming and dusting a crowded environment or the mess that occurs when one has to take something out of an overstuffed closet or shelf -- and then the mess sits because squeezing in back in is more work.

So I try to release stuff and most importantly not bring it into my environment unless it is going to enhance my life or I absolutely love it.

The whole "trick" to flylady is to realize that it's okay not to be perfect -- to set that timer and to forgive oneself. I am still fully capable of staring at a pile of stuff on the couch for days --- on the other hand, I am also aware of hot spots and try to go at them as well.

What has worked for me is flywashing (her term) -- gradually one just becomes more aware that small things can be done in a short amount of time -- it's okay to wash down a few kitchen cabinets while I am waiting for something to heat in the microwave -- or clean one shelf in the refrigerator whereas previously I did nothing because I thought I had to do everything at once.

I will never be able to eat off my kitchen floor :D -- on the other hand, if I am not 15 minutes away (all of the time) from receiving guests, I am not that far off.

[Missi]

I, too, have tried to put the flylady plan to use without much success. However, as several others have said the idea of doing 15 minutes at a time has helped. But my house is nowhere close to being 15 minutes ready!! I use to read the testimonals and be amazed at how quickly people seemed to go from complete mess to instant organization and maintain it all. I agree it is nice to know others stuggle as well.

[wallycat]

I wish I could keep my house "company ready" in 2 days :eek: .
Funny, exercise and eating right aren't as hard for me as cleaning.

Lindrusso, I loved reading your post....I have no kids and when I wasn't working at all...I still had a mess!
At least I feel like I am not alone reading this thread :o

[leightx]

Blaze - yep, I agree it's definitely my "all or none" personality that is doing me in. It frustrates me especially because I know it's a problem, yet I struggle with it everytime I start cleaning. A room just doesn't seem CLEAN until it is scrubbed top to bottom, with all of the drawers and cabinets decluttered and organized. And since that would take days (weeks???), I usually just throw in the towel before I begin. :rolleyes:

I'm working on that aspect of just doing a bit here and there for a few minutes at a time, but it is so danged hard. Is this some sort of warped personality aspect?? It's basically like being an imperfect perfectionist.

I crisis cleaned our house before we went up to my parents for an early Christmas, so we came home to a somewhat cleanish house (not company ready for sure, but better than it usually looks). Then we opened our presents here, with the requisite hundreds of *&^$% plastic containers and boxes and twisties on all the kids' toys, wrapping paper and tissue paper.

We did manage to clean our loft from top to bottom, literally. The loft was the designated dumping ground for the laundry baskets full of *stuff* that was hastily gathered and moved upstairs before company came over. I'm embarassed to admit that I'm now the proud owner of 12 laundry baskets, mostly empty. :o

The kids and I also cleaned and organized their rooms - including the closets. I have 5 full trash bags of clothes and 2 large boxes of toys to give away, and the kids have been upstairs playing constantly in their clean and organized rooms. It's amazing how much more fun it is to play when you can find all the pieces to your Hot Wheels track. They now have only books, puzzles, and a few "sets" of toys each (Hot Wheels and science kits for DS, Build-A-Bear, beading supplies, and Littlest Petshop for DD).

Today I'm concentrating on the rest of the house since we're having a fondue party on New Years. We're only having a few good friends over, so I don't feel the need for everything to be totally immaculate (besides, I don't want to shock my friends). The kitchen counters are clean despite getting sidetracked wiping down the fronts of the cabinets, and a slight detour cleaning out the oven that hasn't been cleaned in 3 years (and won't be used between now and New Year's anyway). :rolleyes:

At least I know I'm not the only one! :p

Edited to add that I think a big part of our problem is that we all have so many hobbies. DS plays three different sports a year (basketball, baseball, soccer), DD and I love crafts (and regularly use those supplies, since I'm also her brownie leader), DH regularly hunts, fishes, and plays golf, we go camping a few times a year, ride our bikes a few times a week, etc. Of course each of these hobbies requires plenty of "stuff", and it's challenging finding a home for everything.

[testkitchen45]

I agree with the near impossibility of keeping up with clutter when you have kids. DH and I are very neat by nature, but kids are sloppy by nature (for the most part)--even my neatest kid won't keep his room up to my standards, and I have to stop myself from harping on it. It's tough, as a neatnik, to share living space with so much kid clutter, and teaching them to put things "all the way away" rather than dropping them where it's convenient is its own full-time job.

I'm glad you started this thread--as a reminder that keeping up with the basics may be all we can accomplish as long as we have a houseful of kiddos (and their friends, who may or may not have been taught to remove muddy shoes b4 entering the house, etc. :eek: ). It's hard to focus on what's "important" (great kids who are good people) instead of on what's "urgent" (kids' slobby clutter). Flylady's emphasis on taking 15-minute bites out of the huge job of homekeeping is a great idea b/c it's hard to stick with more at times. Leightx, I can so relate on the great plans for homekeeping, fitness, etc. & how they can disintegrate when real life intrudes!!:)

[Dyanne]

I found out about FlyLady so long ago, I can't even calculate the number of years! I remember using it from the start at my old house, which we moved to in 2000 or 2001. Wow.

I, too, go on and off the wagon. I've always been the sort of person who organizes drawers like a maniac (my silverware drawer is a beauty, with labels, even!) but couldn't care less what the counters look like. Until someone comes over, that is.

My husband is the opposite. He will stack up 75 pieces of paper on the counter in order to make it "look neat" without a thought about categorization. His bathroom drawers are somewhat deep and completely jumbled. Extra cups next to tubes of nearly-empty toothpaste, next to hair gels, next to Advil, next to Band-Aids, etc. Drives me crazy.

The things FlyLady helped me with most are:
- I don't have to spend two hours cleaning the tub in order for it to be clean. If I do a decent job each week, they'll be fine. (This has been a moot point for a long time, though, since I have a housekeeper now.)
- Don't yell at the kids. They'll remember it, even if I don't.
- Explain to the kids that it doesn't have to be all-or-nothing, and that routines help more than any cleaning product ever will. You can have a perfectly acceptable home even if you're not a nutjob.
- GET RID OF THE CLUTTER!

I'm very excited that we are going to building a new house designed by me and a very thoughtful architect. I can't wait to build a house from scratch that really fits me and my family. Hopefully I'll find that the FlyLady ideas I've been flirting with for years become part of my life.

[lindrusso]

Flylady absolutely saved me -- I do think the original poster isn't getting the gestalt of flylady -- i.e. you are never behind. Her whole point is not to look at the ends as the goal but just to concentrate on the small steps and take pride in doing those -- i.e. her whole idea of the "shiny sink".

Definitely - that's an important part of her message.

I think it's also important to recognize that your "absolute must" or first step doesn't have to be a shiny sink. For me, a shiny sink is just a silly concept that does nothing for me. A clean, empty sink, yes, but a shiny sink that you wipe dry so as to avoid water spots? No way - I can't be bothered to put time into something that lasts about 5 seconds around here. Instead, I picked floors as my must do - I have a dog who leaves a lot of hair around and even if I don't clean another thing, I try to keep the hair up off the floors - it not only makes the house look much better, but it makes me feel as if I've accomplished something.

Lindrusso, I loved reading your post....I have no kids and when I wasn't working at all...I still had a mess!

Oh my gosh, you're so not alone. I think for me it's just so easy to put it off until tomorrow - only tomorrow suddenly becomes a whole week! :o Also, my routine has been disrupted so much lately that I just have not gotten back into it.

I'm working on that aspect of just doing a bit here and there for a few minutes at a time, but it is so danged hard. Is this some sort of warped personality aspect?? It's basically like being an imperfect perfectionist.

What you describe is definitely a symptom of perfectionism - FlyLady talks about this alot - how perfectionism gets in our way.

I'm very much like that, especially with cleaning. Part of it is perfectionism, part of it is simply wanting to get it done and over with and not have to think about it the next day. Problem is, it's never really done. Especially with a big, furry dog. ;)

I'm glad you started this - I feel more motivated to get back into a regular routine.

Now that I'm not working and there's no danger of anyone dropping by since we don't know many people here, I'm really bad about getting dressed and putting on makeup these days. I need to do that - it makes me feel so much better and much more motivated. Also, going around in sweats all day is doing nothing for my weight! :eek:

[seathyme]

... I used to be an all or nothing cleaner. I'd put everything away, dust and vacuum, clean the baseboards, blah, blah, blah. Then I'd be completely burned out and do nothing until it was an absolute mess again...

Ugh, me too! I found Flylady several years ago, and initially applied my same perfectionist tendencies to her system: I'm not just going to apply this here and there, I'm going to do it ALL!:rolleyes: Well, if you try to do *everything* Flylady recommends, you will do nothing but keep house. Those "15 minutes"es really add up!:p After a period of flagellating myself for not even being able to keep up a "simple" system like Flylady's, I quit it altogether, sort of like a bad diet.

But, what had quietly been happening during that time, and has continued since, is a change in attitude, much as others have said. I still blow it regularly, but a little more often I'm a little neater. Humbling to settle for such modest progress! And then, a few months ago, DH had an unexpected conversion and agreed that we should massively downsize. What liberation! We moved into a small rental near a new job, put only things we use or love in it, and have been "decrapifying" our house preparing to sell it. I can't believe how wonderful this feels. It is much easier to keep a small apartment under control than a big house -- which is not to say it still didn't take several hours to prepare for holiday company...:rolleyes: but not several days!

Now my philosophy is sort of Flylady blended with a Buddhist "starting over" meditation. Each moment is a new opportunity [to put something away or do something I've been putting off or invite someone over]. The past is the past, and is not binding on the future.

Thanks for a great New Year's thread!

[Kathy B]

I often start Flylady at the beginning of the month, but I don't think I have ever made it past zone 3 (hence my entryway, dining room and kitchen aren't too bad, but the rest....:eek: )!

A couple of things I have adopted in addition to the already mentioned 15 minute idea ....

The "home blessing". I do spend about an hour at the beginning of most weeks trying to hit the highlights, which means I usually get the bathrooms wiped down, the vacuum run over major pathways, and MAYBE do some dusting.

I also think about cleaning things that never were looked at twice before such as the chimneys on the DR chandalier, the baseboards, and the counterspace behind the breadbox and other kitchen appliances. When you just concentrate on one room, it is easier to really clean it than it is when you think you still have to get all the other rooms done the same day.

I like the "21 thing fling", too, although it is harder for me to do. I have to be in the right mood.:D

I know I do more and a better job than I did before the FlyLady, so I'll keep on working at it. For now, though, I can be company ready in 15 minutes instead of two hours only if I recruit both kids and DH for 15 minutes each as well! :o

[blazedog]

Definitely - that's an important part of her message.

I think it's also important to recognize that your "absolute must" or first step doesn't have to be a shiny sink. For me, a shiny sink is just a silly concept that does nothing for me. A clean, empty sink, yes, but a shiny sink that you wipe dry so as to avoid water spots? No way - I can't be bothered to put time into something that lasts about 5 seconds around here. Instead, I picked floors as my must do - I have a dog who leaves a lot of hair around and even if I don't clean another thing, I try to keep the hair up off the floors - it not only makes the house look much better, but it makes me feel as if I've accomplished something.

:

I don't literally shine my sink either -- although I have realized that an empty sink is the shiny sink for my kitchen and doesn't take long to accomplish -- that is part of what flylady teaches -- if my sink becomes full then everything more easily escalates into a big mess -- her idea of hot spots becoming wildfires becoming conflagrations.

I take the shiny sink as somewhat of a metaphor for the visual cue that subliminally makes it more or less slothful. In the bedroom, making the bed is the shiny sink -- and I have simplified of course through just using a colorful down quilt so that it literally takes 1 minutes or less to make -- When the bed doesn't get made, the clumps of clothing, the piles of shoes, the wads of strange papers mysteriously start accumulating as well.

[lindrusso]

When the bed doesn't get made, the clumps of clothing, the piles of shoes, the wads of strange papers mysteriously start accumulating as well.

Did you peek in my bedroom? ;)

Unfortunately, I don't think that FlyLady thinks of the shiny sink as only a metaphor - she goes into great detail on how to get that sink shiny. It's great if it works for you, but if it doesn't and people can't see past this, they may get stuck and not even try with the rest.

I also wonder if she's not sending out a mixed message on some things. She talks about not being a perfectionist, but just look at the instructions for shining your sink:

Dear Friends,

I want you to smile from ear to ear when you gaze upon your shiny sink.

I have heard every excuse in the world. Even old sinks can look new again with a little elbow grease.

Here is how you do it:

BE SURE AND RINSE WELL BETWEEN EACH STEP OF THE WAY!

1. Take all the dishes out of the sink.

2. Run some very hot water into the sink. Fill to the rim. Only do one side at a time. Then, pour a cup of household bleach into the hot water. Let it sit for 1 hour. Now, pull the plug with a pair of tongs. If you don't have tongs, then scoop some of the water out of the sink into the other sink and use your hand to pull the plug (wear gloves and don't get the bleach-water on your clothes).

3. Rinse your sink well.

4. Use some cleanser (Comet, Ajax, or Baking Soda) and scrub your sink. Ensure you rinse ALL of the cleanser from the sink.

5. Take a sharp edge and clean around the rim of the sink, just like you would clean dirt out from under your fingernails.

6. Clean around the faucets too. You may need an old toothbrush or dental floss.

7. Now, get out your window cleaner, I use Windex, and give it a good shine.

8. If you still don't like the way it looks, then you could try some car wax. Just know in your heart that you have cleaned it very well now and it doesn't have to be perfect. Our perfectionism is what got us in this situation in the first place.

9. Every time you run water in your sink, take your clean dishtowel and dry it out (I lay out a clean one, every night with my before bedtime routine). Before you know it, you will be doing this everytime you leave your kitchen. The rest of the family will too. No more water spots. You will have a clean and shiny sink.

10. Don't have a fit if someone doesn't take as much pride in your sink as you do. It is very easy to fix. You have already done the hard part. You will never have to go through this process again. Daily maintenance will keep it looking this way all the time. Nasty hurtful word are not as easy to repair. Just be sure and tell your family what you are trying to do. They will think you have gone crazy.

11. If you don't have a dishwasher, don't worry. A dishwasher is just a dirty dish disposal. Clean out a place under your sink and put a dishpan in there. Teach your family, that instead of putting their dirty dishes and glasses in the sink, place them into the dish pan. Get into the habit of putting your dishes away as soon as they have been washed and are dry. No more leaving the dish drying rack on the counter or in the sink. Put it away under the sink when you have finished. If your old one is nasty, you may want to soak it in the sink full of bleach water at the same time you soak the sink or go buy a new set.

12. To insure that your family remembers this, put a note in the sink. It will get their attention and remind them where to put the dishes. Be patient! They have never been taught either. It is going to take some practice.

Now if you have a stainless steel sink, I recommend all of the above directions with one extra instruction added: after you soak your sink, rinse well, and use SOS pads to scrub it. This will buff the finish. It will look like new.

If you still can't get it to shine after the Windex, put a light coat of lemon oil or olive oil on it. I mean just a tiny bit on a cloth and rub it. This will make you smile. Some people have had very good results from Bar Keepers Friend.

Go Shine Your Sink!
FlyLady


Now most of this is a one time thing, but can you seriously imagine wiping out your sink every time you use it as it says in #9?? That comes off as quite anal-rententive if you ask me. It would make people afraid to use the sink! I suppose if there were only one or two in the household and you didn't cook much, this would be reasonable, but for the average household? Truly a waste of time - unless, of course, this is truly what you want and you don't mind.

I also think that many parts of the zone cleaning do not need to be done every month. Especially things like cleaning the windows and the curtains. If you have the time, great, but otherwise, some of the things can be done a lot less frequently. Some of the other things - like straightening drawers and vacumming under and behind furniture would probably be fine to do once every other month or two.

Anyway, I think she teaches many good things, I just think it's not important to get too caught up in following it 100% to the letter.

I used to sign up for the emails, but they just get too annoying, but I need to start putting a lot of these ideas back to use again.........

[leightx]

I've never really been able to stick with the shiny sink, and I certainly don't see myself wiping it down after each use! I think the shiny sink is important to *her* (hence the obsession), but I have indeed read emails from her that stated that something else might be your "shiny sink". I guess I just don't have a shiny sink substitute quite yet.

I think part of the problem is that I never really had to clean up when I lived with my parents - my mom did everything (except the dishes, which dad did). :o I kept my room somewhat picked up, but keeping an entire house of stuff orderly is an entirely different matter. I'm hoping to train my kids better, and I definitely don't want them growing up in a messy house!

We did get new bedroom furniture about 2 months ago, and our bedroom has stayed much cleaner since then - maybe because I'm more motivated to keep it pretty in there now. Before that we had hand-me-downs and mismatched college furniture.

Lindrusso - I just wish I could get the floors picked up enough to be able to vacuum the dog hair every day!! Now that the kids' rooms are clean, it will be a bit easier.

Dyanne - congrats on the new house - how exciting!!

[funniegrrl]

A local weekly newspaper writer tried Flylady, then wrote a column about it: http://www.nashvillescene.com/Stories/Columns/Suburban_Turmoil/2006/11/16/The_Cult_of_Clean/index.shtml

[lindrusso]

Lindrusso - I just wish I could get the floors picked up enough to be able to vacuum the dog hair every day!! Now that the kids' rooms are clean, it will be a bit easier.

Well, I should make it clear that I don't do all the floors - only the worst spots. My current carpets are Bailey-colored :D , so I can let those go a bit. It's the area in our breakfast nook and in the kitchen - between crumbs and the fact that all dog hair seems to find its way to under our kitchen table - this area look horrid. It's also the first area that people see when they walk in the house and if the sun is shining just right.... :eek: ....well, you get the idea.....

That article was cute, Funniegrrl. :D

[mgs]

I started to read the article but got distracted by the one thing that makes it impossible for me to follow flylady anymore. My 17 month old son.

Anyone have any suggestions on how to do this w/ a toddler boy? Sorry to be sexist but all his friends are girls and he is the only tornado I know. ;)

I used to follow it right down to the sink. I loved having a shiny sink. Now that I am home all day and DS eats 5 times a day and walks around w/a sippy cup he flings everywhere (they are not completely spill proof:rolleyes: ) I just can't do any of it. The most I get done is what I call the deep cleaning. I continue to stick w/my weekly schedule of laundry on Mondays, floors on Tues/Thurs, Wed is bathroom, Fri is kitchen... but the day to day stuff is a joke. I pick up all the crayons and as I put them in the container DS is removing them. He did just last week get the idea of putting things away, but that is short lived. He will put them away, just to remove them again. He is constantly removing all his books from the bookshelf.

I understand that this is just part of having a toddler, but in this house there is never a time that we are only 15min from company.

Under his highchair alone is a non-stop science experiment. Eee!!gads. THere is so much stuff permanently stuck to the floors and walls. I just look at it and want to cry.

I do have to get into action and quick = we are putting the house on the market in Feb. I have no idea what I am going to do then. How many people want a house this well loved???:eek:

Meg

[zwieback]

Just curious if there is a fee associated with Flylady? I looked at the website and there is a lot to digest, but I couldn't see anything about a monthly subscription fee. Is there one? Or, is the cost just with buying the "accessories" like the calendar, stickers, etc.??

[ChristyMarie]

I'm a slob at heart. Left to my own devices...well, the house wouldn't be pretty! However, I love a clean and organized house and clutter and dirt drive me crazy. I'm a very torn person.:rolleyes:

What has helped me:

Get organized. After this move we really purged. It took us about a year to completely finish - while the house was fairly organized, first the extra bedroom then the basement were dumping-ground disaster areas. First we HAD to clean out the fourth bedroom because our son showed up, lol. That stuff all moved to the basement. About a month ago we took several weekends and really organized it. We ended up having to hire people to come haul all the trash/rubbish stuff away. They ran out of room in their truck!!!:eek: But I can now find things and everything has a spot. I left a SMALL table (maybe 2x3 feet) at the foot of the stairs to set stuff on when I don't have time to put it away. That way it can't get out of control.

We got maids. At the very least this means that every two weeks I have to put everything away so they can clean.

Realize it ain't gonna be perfect. My kitchen and family room are both a little messy - but we live in those rooms and I can get them clean in about 30 minutes.

[lindrusso]

Just curious if there is a fee associated with Flylady? I looked at the website and there is a lot to digest, but I couldn't see anything about a monthly subscription fee. Is there one? Or, is the cost just with buying the "accessories" like the calendar, stickers, etc.??

It's free to join. As you said, it's just the accessories that cost money.

[mgs]

It's free

Ha ha! I just got a chance to read the article!

I do need to get on some sort of schedule soon, but I don't know that i can keep up w/Flylady. I love the quote about my mother living in my inbox. So true.

One thing about the emails, they repeat monthly. I got them for a month then unsubscribed as soon as I realized I was getting repeats. They also used to have a discussion board, but I can't seem to find it anywhere now.

[blazedog]

Interesting in terms of how people "interpret" flylady's message.

I generally hear her voice saying "housework improperly done still blesses the home" which gives me permission to swab the floor with a swifter, not move furniture but vacuum the obvious debris instead of beating myself up with some idea of perfection and then not doing anything.

She is all about not burning yourself out -- her mantra is your home didn't get this way in a day -- don't do too much and burn out -- whatever you can do in 15 minutes -- whether it's decluttering or cleaning. I almost never literally follow what one is supposed to be doing -- but the stuff becomes internalized -- I have learned that just a short period of time and something can be done -- if I take 5 minutes and toss the obvious debris from the living area, things don't slide downhill precipitously. If I open a closet or drawer, I often realize that something can be gotten rid of -- so it's a mindset. If I am brushing my teeth, I might wipe down the counter or windex the mirror or even spray some heavy duty cleanser in the tub so that when I take a shower, I can just spray it off.

And the stuff does repeat itself -- which is somewhat of the point as it washes over you. I don't open it most of the time but it keeps me somewhat on track --

And at the risk of sounding like a broken record, trying to keep clutter out -- giving myself permission to toss -- because you can't organize clutter is key. Things have to earn a place in my home now -- it's so much harder to get rid of stuff once it is there for so many reasons -- guilt at having wasted the money, fear that one will need it; inertia because it does take effort -- physical and emotional to cull through stuff and make decisions -- especially if one is essentially a pack rat from a line of packrats -- learned behavior plus what I think is a genetic component. At least now I open a closet and ask WHY am I keeping something as opposed to presuming that because I own it, it must be kept.

[mgs]

I just started our big throw out - like I said in previous post, we are moving in Feb. We will be downsizing from a 3 story house w/a basement that is quite full to a 2 bedroom apt in SF! so HELLO I have to get rid of A LOT of stuff. Anyway - something Blazedog said got me thinking - TALK ABOUT WASTED MONEY! I just came up from the basement where each time I opened a box I thought, "i have soemthing like this upstairs" or "I just saw one of those in that other box!" HOW ANNOYING!

Flylady does work, for sure. But the problem I have, as I previously posted, is my toddler tornado. I also wipe down the tub when I am in it, wipe off the couters when DS is eating dinner, swish the toilet when DS is in the bathtub, etc.

Meg

[foodfiend]

I wanted to add that Flylady did help me get my act together, but it took about 2 YEARS to get my apartment in the shape I wanted (and that's just an apartment!) There was more than organizing and cleaning involved in this process, of course. But Flylady helped me develop new habits that I never realized had to be developed. Even after a few months on her program, I felt better because my place was cleaner. Not perfect, not company-ready but cleaner than it had been. I felt better about myself.

[blazedog]

I just started our big throw out - like I said in previous post, we are moving in Feb. We will be downsizing from a 3 story house w/a basement that is quite full to a 2 bedroom apt in SF! so HELLO I have to get rid of A LOT of stuff. Anyway - something Blazedog said got me thinking - TALK ABOUT WASTED MONEY! I just came up from the basement where each time I opened a box I thought, "i have soemthing like this upstairs" or "I just saw one of those in that other box!" HOW ANNOYING!

Flylady does work, for sure. But the problem I have, as I previously posted, is my toddler tornado. I also wipe down the tub when I am in it, wipe off the couters when DS is eating dinner, swish the toilet when DS is in the bathtub, etc.

Meg

Meg -- you are beating yourself up for what you are NOT doing instead of appreciating what you ARE doing -- turn it around. It's so not about perfection -- if you isolate your toddler problem, maybe it can become manageable -- i.e. just set the timer for 3 minutes and scrub down one section of his food disaster area -- and then give yourself permission to stop when the timer rings.


She also does a lot about decluttering and children's things which may be helpful -- or not -- i.e. limiting the amount of playthings at one time to minimize mess.

And yes, the horror of discovering that one already has something but has forgotten about it because it had been squirreled away.

As about being 15 minutes away from having people over -- I used to live in C.H.A.O.S -- i.e. can't have anybody over syndrome because the clutter had become overwhelming. Would I host a formal dinner party for acquaintances on 15 minutes notice -- no.But I would definitely feel comfortable having close friends drop by which is how I "personally" interpret it and they won't worry that the Madwoman of Chaillot has taken up residence.

[ADM]

[QUOTE=leightx;1148403]I've never really been able to stick with the shiny sink, and I certainly don't see myself wiping it down after each use!
QUOTE]

I had to teach myself, "CONSTANT shiny sink* when our house was on the market. One day a Realtor called to say she was bringing a prospective buyer to look at the house. My sink was absolutly shiny :cool: , but I found myself washing the soap to make sure it was clean! :eek: (This sort of thing gets out of hand pretty quickly! :rolleyes: ).

[MaryMorph]

I haven't been on the board for a few weeks b/c of the holiday and b/c of an early present from Santa (or should that be satan:mad: ?) in the form of a broken ankle and b/c of my 19 month old tornado (also known as my son), but I'm taking this thread as a sign that the cult cleaning lady needs to come back into my life. Great timing, as I'm reading this on New Year's eve, and we're planning on putting our place onto the market within the next month. The flylady method is a good way to start (and finish) the year!

Heck, with this stupid cast on, babysteps and a single shoe are about all I can manage! I think that I can do 15 minutes of picking up a day, but not much more that that.

mary jo

[testkitchen45]

I started to read the article but got distracted by the one thing that makes it impossible for me to follow flylady anymore. My 17 month old son.

Anyone have any suggestions on how to do this w/ a toddler boy? Sorry to be sexist but all his friends are girls and he is the only tornado I know. ;)

I've been there, with twin tornadoes. It helps to have a few rules that you absolutely won't budge on--and his wandering your halls with a drippy sippy cup has got to stop. :) Our rule always was that drinks stayed in the kitchen--period. It helps a lot. Some of the rest, you just have to deal with and wait out--my fave was when my kids would empty all their bookshelves & use the books as building blocks. You couldn't see the carpet in their room on those days!

blazedog: her mantra is your home didn't get this way in a day

On some days, it does! :D . . . As an unreformed neatnik who battles clutter constantly (not always successfully!!), I've learned that there's an inverse relationship b/w the # of kids in a home, and the fraction of a day in which the house can get trashed. Zero kids, and you and DH could trash it in a day, given the right project. Three kids, and only 1/3 of a day needs to elapse b4 it's trashed. Four kids, plus one friend each, is 1/8 of a day to trash the house--and I'm defining "day" as "awake time" as well! :p

[PAMMELA]

I opened this thread wondering what the heck is flylady? Never heard of her! But, I will have to pat myself on the back and say that I am definitely 15 minutes from company ready on any given day. It's just me and DH (who is rathy sloppy) and the two kitties, so I don't have the kid-clutter, but still. When I was a teenager OMG was I ever a pig! My mom always told me she couldn't WAIT to see my house when I moved out. :) Guess people change!