Help! 1st Dog doesn't like New Pup!

[Varaile]

We have a 3 year old lab-mix and on Sunday we brought home a new English Setter pup (9 1/2 weeks). We knew that there would be some anxiety on the older dogs part, but she seems to be having a hard time dealing with the the little one.

She has her own sleeping bed; pup is crated at night. We are trying to make sure we give her lots of luvin'. We are trying to play with her as much as possible, but not to the extent of leaving the pup out. We are trying to do things "pack style" (ie...one goes out we all go out). And I've been feeding them on opposite sides of the kitchen gate.

She varies between totally ignoring him; cautious curiosity and irritation. If he bumps her the wrong way she growls and snaps. I've reprimanded her for that but I'm not sure that's what I should be doing. He, on the other hand, seems just sorta sad that the other dog wants nothing to do with him. He's not obnoxious, he generally minds himself except for when he would like to play. All in all he seems to be a well mannered little guy.

Are we being to anxious? I know that these things can't be rushed, but I thought she would start to relax a bit by now.

Any insight would be helpful!

TIA!

[lhall]

It took a couple of months for our old cat to adjust to the new one. I'd give it a little more time.

Leigh

[beejayw1]

If you're doing things 'pack style', you have to remember something very important: packs have different ranks for different members.

This is crucial to keep in mind. Your lab mix is the senior dog in the pack and I'm sure she's a little jealous of her position. From what you say, you are being very evenhanded with both dogs, and it's a bit of a (very well-meaning) mistake. You need to give her more attention than the puppy. If you want to fuss over the puppy, do it away from the older dog. When they're together act as though the older dog outranks the pup.

Secondly: has the older dog drawn blood when it growled and snapped? I doubt it. Growling and snapping are pretty normal between adult dogs and puppies, and if your older dog hasn't injured the pup yet, I doubt it's going to happen. I suspect the pup has shown submissive behavior; this is very appropriate. Keep an eye on things by all means, but if this older dog has been a good dog, I suggest you allow yourselves to trust it.

Has the pup ousted the grownup from your bedroom? I suggest you take it out of your bedroom and let the older dog back in.

I'm in a bit of a rush at the moment (heading out of my office for the day) but if I can think of any links or anything else, I'll either edit this post or else post new.

Relax! Things will be fine! It takes humor, love and time.

[RunnerKim]

Congratulations on your new family member! These things do take time - you need to give it at least a couple of weeks. And I wouldn't reprimand your older dog. Puppies are obnoxious and have to learn to "respect their elders" - the best person to do that job is the older dog. He's not going to hurt the puppy (from what you've indicated). A little growling and snapping are normal - even mama dog does that to her pups. the more you interfere the longer it will take for the 2 dogs to settle in with each other.

Make sure you give the older dog plenty of pup-free time as it sounds like you're doing and it should all work out in a couple weeks. I know it's stressful and you just want everyone to get along - but these weeks will be over soon!

Kim

[ChristieinMB]

I just got a puppy several weeks ago and was very concerned about my very spoiled, pampered 5 year old Cavalier. She at first growled and snapped, but before the week was up they were playing. Now they just love each other and play all the time. The only time the older one is mean is feeding time, I keep them separate then. I agree with what others have said, dogs need pecking order, don't try to be fair and equal like humans do, dogs don't understand it. A good book is Good Owners Great Dogs, he explains the way dogs think (how does he know). Dogs growl to talk, it is not always a prelude to a fight. BTW I just love my new Cavalier, she is adorable, aren't puppies fun?
I bet things will be fine, just gie it time.
Christie

[Varaile]

Thanks everyone!

Unbeknownst to me, DH called the vet today and asked the same question! It is reasuring to have so many similar answers!

beejayw1 Thank you for the tip on being too even handed with both dogs. I will pass the tip to praise the older dog more than pup onto DH.

Runnerkim "Make sure you give the older dog plenty of pup-free time." We did this today and it really seemed to help. Kia was much better around pup this evening. Thanks!

And here I thought the puppy was going to be the hard one to deal with!

I appreciate any tips to help get us through this "growing period"!