Community Message Boards
Results 1 to 30 of 30

Thread: more bad dates...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    78704 - more than a zipcode, it's a lifestyle.
    Posts
    1,859

    more bad dates...

    Dear Mr. Saturday Lunch Date,

    If you take the time to pursue someone over several weeks and finally make arrangements to meet in person, state multiple times how you're "really excited to be meeting", it sort of undermines your credibility when you are unable to arrive at the designated place anywhere close to on time.

    Last time I checked, your part of Austin was not in a different time zone. And to compound your error, you did not call to tell me you were going to be late until after you already were late. And then you said you were only 5 minutes away. And then you said, where are we meeting - restaurant A or B? When in fact I was already sitting in the hot texas outdoors at restaurant C which had been clearly discussed about 15 hours before.

    So you really have no reason to sound like a spoiled child when, after you were 20 minutes late (15 more than you had alloted for in the previous phone conversation), the hostess had called our table twice, I was sweating buckets in the shaded tables, and I called you. You stated "I'm about 7 minutes away." I said, "you know what, I can already tell this is not going to be fun. Sorry, but have a good day." Oh, and you can stop calling me as I write this.

    To reiterate where you went wrong.
    1) you have the memory of a tadpole if you can't take the time to write down the location of your "very exciting" date.
    2) you are ruder than rude to be late and to not call until you were actually late. Did you expect to encounter some sort of wormhole that would get you to the restaurant on time? And remember, you set the meeting time. A simple phone call 10 minutes prior would have been considerate.
    3) you were even ruder than that when after missing the second time line, which you also set, and didn't call. Respect people's time. It's a major character flaw when you don't.

    Respectfully,
    LHG

    ah venting, love it.

    Dear Mr. Trumpet Maestro,

    You may be the best trumpet player in Austin, but you are also the whiniest. If everything was so much better in Ohio, or Kentucky, or New York, then go back. Also, whining "That's not faaaaiiiiir any time someone mentions that they've been to a place you haven't is extremely childish. Get off your butt, visit Travelocity.com, and go. And don't invite me! And don't expect me to invite you on my trips, if I wanted a whiny 8 year old boy I'd borrow one from a friend.

    Sincerely,
    LHG

    hmmm... feeling better already!

    Dear Bosco,

    You are the best dog ever. Can you please transfer your pleasant fun personality into a decent looking non-self-centered male in the Austin area?

    Thanks,
    LHG
    Your actions speak so loudly I can hardly hear you - Henry David Thoreau

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2000
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    24,226
    Gosh Kristin maybe you should consider looking places other than Austin! Sometimes the place is just a bit too weird!
    Well-behaved women seldom make history!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2001
    Location
    Heading WEST!!
    Posts
    14,696
    OY! The memories!!
    And my DH can't understand why women hate dating...and why I told him if anything ever happened to him, I'd remain alone forever, except for cats
    Thoreau said, 'A man is rich in proportion to the things he can leave alone.'

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    San Tan Valley, AZ
    Posts
    5,841
    And to think I just read in a magazine or somewhere that Austin is the best place to be single.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Houston, TX
    Posts
    5,645
    LHG -

    I feel your pain!!! But, let me at least say that you have dates. I sit here all alone destined to be a spinster trapped in my house with a cat I don't want when my child is old enough to leave me for her own life....Ugh...isn't there a decent man in all of Houston who can get past a few pounds ( not too many ) and discover that I'm hillarious, a great cook, delightfully sarcastic and a blast to be around??? All the ones that notice and comment on those traits are already married to my best girl friends!!!!

    Hang in there...he's out there dating horrible women in search of you too!!!
    Terri _A
    I'm anal retentive. I'm a workaholic. I have insomnia. And I'm a control freak. That's why I'm not married. Who could stand me?” -Madonna

    Read my ramblings about food and my nutty life on Hidden Content

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by KristiB
    And to think I just read in a magazine or somewhere that Austin is the best place to be single.
    Maybe they meant the best place to be single if you wanted to REMAIN single!
    "This better be important! Is the frickin' meadow on fire?" -- Hidden Content

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    San Tan Valley, AZ
    Posts
    5,841
    Well she's getting dates. They just leave a lot to be desired.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    NashVegas, baby!
    Posts
    5,894
    Having suffered through many of the same indignities as LH Gal in the last few years ...

    Let me say first that I don't really believe in stereotyping men and women, and I don't hate men or think they are all jerks. I love men, and I know plenty of nice, stable, mature guys. I also know women who give all females a bad name. That makes it even more frustrating to constantly get the "you're so wonderful, I really like you, etc." speeches only to have them flake out (or, as is common with me) disappear off the face of the earth before you even go out the first time. I meet guys I really connect with, they act very interested, they even go so far as to make suggestions about doing something specific (a movie on Saturday, a night-time museum tour on Friday, whatever). Then, *poof* -- they vanish into thin air, never to be seen again.

    And, it's not just me. A friend of mine and I were out a few weeks ago and she really hit it off with a guy we met. When I took my leave, they hung out for the next 4 hours, closing down the bar and lingering in the parking lot talking until the wee hours. He called her every day afterwards for 5 days, and in their last conversation they discussed work schedules (both work odd hours) with the goal of getting together later that week. That was 2 weeks ago and she hasn't heard from him since. Another girl I know agreed to a date with a guy who fed her lines similar to the ones in LHG's story ... how much he liked her, was looking forward to going out, etc. He called her a few hours before saying that something had come up with work, he was really sorry but needed to postpone. She said, "of course," he reiterated how much he was anticipating their date. She never heard from him again. What's UP with that?

    I don't think "Mr. Right" is just out there just waiting to be discovered or whatever. I've never believed there is "someone out there for everyone." Obviously, there's not, and I hate the platitudes that try to convince otherwise. So at this stage I'm not husband-hunting or looking only for *shudder* "commitment." But, I don't think it's too much to ask to meet a few compatible men who like being with me and respect me enough to be courteous and considerate, even if the relationship is going to be casual. Boys, if you're going to talk the talk, you gotta walk the walk. If you're not going to follow through, if you're not going to act like a grown-up, then just mosey on to the next girl down the bar.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2001
    Location
    Houston
    Posts
    6,332
    Quote Originally Posted by LonghornGal
    Can you please transfer your pleasant fun personality into a decent looking non-self-centered male in the Austin area?
    Hey, Kristin! My brother is a decent-looking (losing his hair, though), non-self-centered male in the Austin area! He's a little on the weird side, but loveable (or at least that's what he keeps telling me! ) He's been doing the online dating thing for a while (doesn't do well in bars since he's kind of shy, and doesn't meet many women at work) and has had moderate success as far as meeting people and having fun dates, but still hasn't found anyone.

    Let me know if you want his email address.
    We figured there was too much happiness here for just the two of us, so we figured the next logical step was to have us a critter.

    - H.I. McDunnough, "Raising Arizona"
    --------------------------------------------------
    Ask me about Kelly's Kids children's clothes!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Hockeytown!
    Posts
    9,564
    Ah, Kristin, I feel your pain. What I struggle with is that just because someone doesn't show up in the "typical" romantic fashion, following the usual path, doesn't mean that things won't work out. We find guys in the strangest places. I think I may have found one right up the road from me. Who knows.
    "Is ice hockey hard? I don't know, you tell me. We need to have the strength and power of a football player, the stamina of a marathon runner and the concentration of a brain surgeon. But, we need to put all this together while moving at high speeds on a cold and slippery surface while 5 other guys use clubs to try and kill us. Oh, yeah, did I mention that this whole time we're standing on blades 1/8 of an inch thick. Is ice hockey hard? I don't know, you tell me. Next question."

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    78704 - more than a zipcode, it's a lifestyle.
    Posts
    1,859
    Thanks all, I feel less annoyed now. Lately I have really been seeing the plus side of becoming a "crazy cat lady" (to quote my brother). Of course, that would require finding a cat that could handle Bosco. Spinsterhood has its benefits - you never have to compromise on what kind of pizza to order.

    And yes, I am going out on dates, so I shouldn't complain. But honestly, were these men raised in barns? I keep telling myself "See, there's a good reason that one's still single."

    That and I have reached the point in life where I'm not willing to put up with a lot of BS to just have someone to call when I am bored. I have plenty of friends that I don't have enough time for already. I'm willing to invest time in meeting new people, I just hate totally wasting it!

    And Funniegirl - I HATE the poof act. It's just rude.

    --Kristin
    Your actions speak so loudly I can hardly hear you - Henry David Thoreau

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    4,493
    Kristin,
    At least it's never boring!!

    I'm interested in the self-proclaimed "best trumpet player in Austin. Wondering if it's someone I know. . .

    Better luck next round!!

    Robyn
    I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day. ~E.B. White

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Location
    Phoenix, AZ
    Posts
    1,665
    Quote Originally Posted by wallycat
    OY! The memories!!
    And my DH can't understand why women hate dating...and why I told him if anything ever happened to him, I'd remain alone forever, except for cats
    Exactly what I tell my DH, 'cept I be known as the "crazy widowed dog lady"

    As far as the "poof" perhaps they are being abducted by aliens , Area 51 IS in Texas isn't it ?

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Dec 2000
    Location
    Houston, Texas
    Posts
    3,977

    Cool

    my 25 y/o GF called me last night to complain that she had had a date with guy who was SO excited to see her but wasn't excited enough to buy her a ticket to a concert until she showed up! Then once she got there, there were no more tickets! He says that he feels bad about her being out there by herself and that he would call her. She said, "Don't call me later or ever." And walks out the door...

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    2,324
    Quote Originally Posted by luv2cook
    my 25 y/o GF called me last night to complain that she had had a date with guy who was SO excited to see her but wasn't excited enough to buy her a ticket to a concert until she showed up! Then once she got there, there were no more tickets! He says that he feels bad about her being out there by herself and that he would call her. She said, "Don't call me later or ever." And walks out the door...
    Sounds like he's experienced in being stood up!
    Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Dec 2000
    Location
    Houston, Texas
    Posts
    3,977
    uh, yeah, or something else. She was MAD!

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    NashVegas, baby!
    Posts
    5,894
    Quote Originally Posted by LonghornGal
    And Funniegirl - I HATE the poof act. It's just rude.
    LOL ... I had actually typed ... "It's just RUDE" ... and deleted it for some reason before posting.

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    In my heaven on earth
    Posts
    13,232
    Kristin,

    That's so weird, I was just thinking this morning that I hadn't seen you around in awhile! I'll be in Austin next Saturday, any interest in grabbing a drink?

    Robyn

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    rural southern NJ and NYC
    Posts
    2,273
    (((LHG))), i feel for you. bummer!!!! i am so glad to be off the market, so to speak, even if it has meant making more compromises than i would have years ago. i've had a couple of great loves, a strange marriage, and haven't dated in 4 years, since i finally caved in and set up housekeeping with SO. Match.com was a real misery--a couple of my GF's husbands turned up there!

    dating was great in my 20's and again in my mid-late 30's; 40's i was much choosier, and by now, it's been good to settle down a bit and take a break.

    however, i still hold out hope that i have one great love yet to be found in my 60's...
    What one understands is only half true. What one does not understand is the full truth. ~ Zen saying

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    North Texas
    Posts
    415
    well shoot, i can't even find guys who are interested enough to stand me up. i swear, i must be invisible or something.
    - KATE

  21. #21
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    Renton, WA
    Posts
    6,543
    You left before he even got there....?

    Kristin, you're my hero.
    ~ "The right shoe can change your life...."- Cinderella ~

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Houston, TX
    Posts
    5,645
    Quote Originally Posted by mackandme
    well shoot, i can't even find guys who are interested enough to stand me up. i swear, i must be invisible or something.
    I'm so with you!!! I recently was talking to this guy that I met on match.com. He asked me how long I had been single - I told him my divorce was final 2 1/2 years ago. His response? "I can't believe you haven't gotten laid in 2 1/2 years!" The next sound he heard was a click and a dialtone. First, none of his business, and second, if you'd say that to someone when you don't know them well...what kinds of thing would he say to a "friend"????

    Ugh...sometimes I think single is better.
    Terri _A
    I'm anal retentive. I'm a workaholic. I have insomnia. And I'm a control freak. That's why I'm not married. Who could stand me?” -Madonna

    Read my ramblings about food and my nutty life on Hidden Content

  23. #23
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    South Carolina
    Posts
    2,663
    Um, am I the only one secretly rooting for Kristin and Rebecca's brother to meet, hit it off and live happily ever after?

    Sorry these guys are turning out to be such weenies Kristin (and others). Ugh. Dating is rough. ((()))
    "With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy."

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Columbus, Ohio
    Posts
    4,104
    Quote Originally Posted by mackandme
    well shoot, i can't even find guys who are interested enough to stand me up. i swear, i must be invisible or something.

    sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees - i feel your pain though. there are times when just a few dates to b!tch about would be nice instead my ex boyfriend calls me non-stop and drives me nuts :mad:
    - Josie


  25. #25
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    San Tan Valley, AZ
    Posts
    5,841
    [QUOTE=Terri_A]I'm so with you!!! I recently was talking to this guy that I met on match.com. He asked me how long I had been single - I told him my divorce was final 2 1/2 years ago. His response? "I can't believe you haven't gotten laid in 2 1/2 years!"
    [QUOTE]


  26. #26
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Appleton, WI
    Posts
    4,517
    Quote Originally Posted by ellery
    Um, am I the only one secretly rooting for Kristin and Rebecca's brother to meet, hit it off and live happily ever after?
    Me too! Me too!! Wouldn't that be a GREAT CLBB story to tell.
    Merry: I don't think he knows about second breakfast, Pip.
    Pippin: What about elevenses? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper? He knows about them, doesn't he?


    I'm food bloggin' almost daily at Hidden Content !Hidden Content

  27. #27
    Join Date
    Aug 2000
    Location
    With the voices in my head
    Posts
    7,791
    Quote Originally Posted by Terri_A
    I'm so with you!!! I recently was talking to this guy that I met on match.com. He asked me how long I had been single - I told him my divorce was final 2 1/2 years ago. His response? "I can't believe you haven't gotten laid in 2 1/2 years!" The next sound he heard was a click and a dialtone.

    Ugh...sometimes I think single is better.
    Oh my gawd, I thought I'd heard it all. :mad: :mad: And amen, funniegrrl!!

    No dates here lately either but life has been great
    as I have been travelling a lot this year, hanging with family and friends and planning great parties with my best friend. Petwise: eccentric bird lady.

    I have had some guys ask me for my number and then do the disappearing act. I say why bother if you don't have the courage to step up to the plate?? In the future, I will tell them that I do not give out my number and if they still think I'm fabulous come Monday, they can find me through my work if they are still interested.

    I don't hate men, but some are just more trouble than they are worth, but in hindsight make for some funny stories.

    The last person I dated asked me to marry him after 3 months because he wanted to marry a US citizen. Then, he had the nerve to say that he wanted to pick out my clothes (I had to look "perfect" when we went out ) because he knew best, wanted his food to be prepared simply, and... get rid of my bird Cordel. I basically told him that he was the one who needed the favor, but wanted me to change my life. He very seriously told me that any suggestions he made would be improvements. Naturally, Cordel is a much better companion thank you very much and he respects my right to look like cr@p if I so desire.

    I have another story that's pretty funny in a sad way, but that's another post as this one is a bit longer than intended.
    Life is all about a$$; you're either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, busting it, trying to get a piece of it, behaving like one, or you live with one.

    Maxine

  28. #28
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Montreal, QC, Canada
    Posts
    1,694
    Have you tried online dating...it worked for me and Marc...although we chatted for 4 years off and on before we finally decided to meet - we did meet eventually and fell in love on our second date...that was 2 and a half years ago and we got married last month!

    My Blog! Hidden Content

  29. #29
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    NashVegas, baby!
    Posts
    5,894
    So far online "dating" for me has been WORSE than random meetings. The only men who seem to be interested are at least 10 years older and arrogant and/or seriously incompatible (practically illiterate, look like Larry the Cable Guy's more-unattractive brother, etc.).

  30. #30
    Join Date
    Aug 2000
    Location
    With the voices in my head
    Posts
    7,791
    I just found this on the top 10 cities for singles. Austin is 8th.

    http://realestate.msn.com/Rentals/Ar...94846&GT1=8384

    funniegrrl, your online dating experiences sound similar to mine, with the addition of men who are way too young. The literacy issue was a big one. All in all, I did not find it time well spent and had a big sigh of relief when I walked away from it.
    Life is all about a$$; you're either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, busting it, trying to get a piece of it, behaving like one, or you live with one.

    Maxine

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •