Keeping in touch with parents...

[SusanMac]

ljt2r - we do this with DH's parents! I actually love it! We often put them on the speaker phone (and taught them how to use this very advanced phone feature on their end ;-) so we can all talk together. It's really fun. It's much better than when just DH talks to them, hangs up, and has to reiterate absolutely everything they said to me afterwards. We don't do it all the time, but I enjoy it when we do.

It's not the type of family where everyone talks on top of each other, so it works OK (heck, many people I work with can't handle a group conference call for this reason!!)

Also, MIL says that DH doesn't talk enough & she doesn't know how to communicate to him (he's much closer to his dad). So, having the group conversation actually helps a bit.

[ljt2r]

Originally Posted by LakeMartinGal

Do you mean that they both talk at the same time, or are they just on the phone at the same time? We are all on the phone together, but usually, DH and I are just listening to the stories. She (DD1) will call the house to catch us both, but she'll call the cell phones, if she wants to talk to someone particular. DH's whole family does the "everybody on the phone at the same time" thing at Christmas! You're right, Laura. No meaningful conversation there at all!

I mean that when they speak to their grandchildren, they are ALWAYS on the phone at the same time. So my poor kid is not sure whom she is hearing or whom she is talking to (keep in mind, 2-3 YO). I had friends in college whose parents always did this too, granted they knew whom they were talking to but still what I want to talk to my mom about is not what I want to talk to my dad about. I am friends with them, they are not just my parents. I don't know how you do that if you ALWAYS must have everything equal and be on the phone at the same time.

I totally get the engagement/birth announcement stuff though.

[MaryMac]

Both my mom and MIL are widows. I talk to my mom daily and sometimes multiple times per day. Most are just wanting to check in on her and other times to tell or discuss something with her. My soon to be ex-husband rarely calls him mom, so I talk to her and it varies between multiple times per week to not talking for a few weeks.
DD is studying abroad and tries to call or Skype daily. When she's in this time zone we can talk three times per day. DS is in college too, but if I get a text once per week I'm lucky and usually it's for something. He's not a big talker.
As for conference style calls....I hate them!

[avariell]

When I studied abroad in Portugal, I absolutely called home every single day. I didn't have a computer in Portugal (this is about 10 years ago) but I would have welcomed the opportunity to Skype while I was over there.

[Gilgamesh37]

Mom used to call me probably 5-7 times a week, and there would be days when she would call multiple times. Often she seemed to try to find excuses to call--"Well, you got this thing in the mail and I just wasn't sure what you wanted me to do with it. So how are things with you?" I loved her and I think we were close, but we were not one of those "my mom is my best friend" mother/daughters. I think she would have liked that, but it just wasn't how I felt. The one thing that drove me crazy was that at 5 pm her time, she'd pour herself a drink and call me, wanting to settle in and chat. Well, that was 4 pm my time and I was trying to get things at work wrapped up and finished so I could leave at 5. No matter how many times I asked her not to call at that particular time, she still did. I would only talk to Dad occasionally--when he'd answer the phone, or at teh end of the conversation when mom was say "Say hello to your father" and Dad would say "I'll get all the news from mom."

After Mom died, I called my Dad every day for about 6 months, until it became clear that he found it intrusive. Now we probably talk 1-2 a week, although we email frequently about financial things (I had to take over all his finances after mom died). I try to make sure at least 1 of those calls is purely social stuff and no finance/business, so he doesn't feel like our entire relationship is me nagging at him.

[hollysmom]

Funny - I was reading this when Dad called to check on Scott since he had a little surgery on Wednesday. I probably talk to Dad and Claire (Mom died in 2004 and Dad remarried at age 80) 1/week or more and see them most Sundays.

Scott talks to his mother at least 1/week. We visit her in Boston at Thanksgiving and Spring Break (more before the kids started school).

SSM

[pointerhaven]

Funny this should come up as a topic because I was thinking that I had not heard from mom in weeks. I ususally try to call her every few weeks, but I talk with at least one of my sisters every week. Mostly my sister Charlotte. I'm the only one who lives away from Tampa, so they are all there and see mom every day.

My daughter lives here in Va and we see and or talke to each other every day. Especially since the baby was born.