How to be helpful/ thoughtful for someone in the ICU?

Blissful_in_TX · #1 11-09-2009, 05:36 PM

This is regarding a relative (first cousin once removed) who was in an auto accident. He’s been in the ICU for the last couple of weeks and will be moving to a regular room once one opens up on a certain floor. He can’t really move, so things like books, magazines, puzzles are out. He’s pretty out of it, so books wouldn’t be too feasible anyway, but he’s coming along. Now he can just open his eyes and move his lips, but not talk. I was thinking of maybe a comedy cd he could listen to? Do you think they would have a cd player?

As far as helping out the family, maybe gift certificates to restaurants in the area? Any other ideas? They live about an hour and a half from the hospital, and neither their house or the hospital is around here, so I can’t do much in person (ie, delivering dinner).

Any thoughts appreciated!

tbb113 · #2 11-09-2009, 07:40 PM

I would be surprised if the hospital had a cd player available for his use (unless they rent them). If he can concentrate, books on tape might be an option. Or maybe an iPod shuffle and you can keep changing the music?

I think the idea of gift certificates for the family is a great one.

Julie O · #3 11-09-2009, 07:46 PM

It's higly unlikely the room will have a CD player. I've only seen one hospital room that had a DVD player, although sometimes there are VCRs. Internet access in hospitals can also be really limited. We did buy a CD player for the room while a family member was in the hospital. The CD player came with a remote, which was very helpful. An IPod with favorite music would have been ideal, but the family would want to make sure someone's keeping an eye on it all the time. Burned CDs with favorite music and a CD player would be nice. Gift certificates would be very helpful for the family, not just for food but also things like Target. It's inconvenient to be away from home. If they're staying in a hotel, quarters for laundry would probably be appreciated. Also books and magazines for the family--cheerful but not too much so-would be nice. Comedy CDs would probably be a bit much.

You may want to check the hospital's website to see what's available at the hospital and what businesses are nearby. That might give you some ideas for gift certificates. We always liked places like Panera Bread because they served 3 meals a day and they had internet access.

amyvn · #4 11-09-2009, 08:06 PM

It's not something for entertainment, but a bedside toiletry kit would probably be useful. The toiletries in every hospital I've known have been cheap at best (and the toothpaste is *terrible*), and having a nicely put together kit would probably be nice.

If he's out of it because he's recovering from a brain injury (in fact even if he's not), he might enjoy having a photo album, or a poster for his room with old pictures. Both can serve as conversation pieces for visitors as well.

Best wishes to him for a strong recovery. It sounds like he may have a long rehabilitation ahead.

Amy

Beth · #5 11-09-2009, 08:26 PM

Music would be my first though -- an ipod with a variety of music and earphones, small speakers or a docking station. A docking station where it can charge and earphones would be ideal. And a variety of music styles and tempos. You could put comedy selections on an ipod too (but will it hurt to laugh -- or be too much as suggested above?).

Movies would be nice too, but that would probably require a DVD player and possibly some help loading and playing. The TV channels can be very limited.

Fresh fruit was one of the things I appreciated the most, and perhaps the patient and the family can enjoy that. Help with meals sounds good. Maybe a gas card or a night at hotel so they don't have to drive for a day or two.

Kathy B · #6 11-09-2009, 10:39 PM

I'd be careful about expensive items like ipods or cd players. Unless the family is there to put them somewhere safe when not in use, they could disappear. Sad to think people would do that, but it does happen.

If he is just beginning to come around after a head injury, items to help him reorient might be useful. A framed family photo, a large clock he can see, or a daily calendar that the family or nurse could update (like one of those with the tear away pages that they sell in bookstores). The toiletry kit is a nice idea, too.

If you are able to call or visit, that means a great deal to patients and families who are stuck in the hospital for long periods of time. Maybe even an offer to sit with him for an evening so the family can take a break or go out to dinner. Definitely keep checking in. After the initial flux of visitors when an accident happens, people get busy with their schedules, and the patient and family can feel pretty isolated.

Luckyfeather · #7 11-10-2009, 09:38 AM

I second the idea of posters/pictures for his room. If he has a hobby or likes sports, a poster relating to that would be nice. And, I was thinking of a fruit or snack basket for the family. Anything you do, as small as it may seem, will be very much appreciated.

TKay · #8 11-10-2009, 11:05 AM

This may not be helpful to you at the moment, but I think I'd hold off on real gifts for now. I think a series of cards or notes that show you care would be most appropriate. Then, as he recovers more, you can send something. I know the few times I've been in the hospital (and I wasn't in for an injury), the pain meds and fatigue alone kept me from really needing entertainment. As he wakes up more and comes back into feeling like himself, he'll probably then appreciate something. But right now, I think kind thoughts are enough. As for the family, the food gift cards are a great idea.

Hang in there. I hope his recovery is speedy. You're kind to show you care in any way.

Blissful_in_TX · #9 11-10-2009, 11:29 AM

Oh wow, thanks for all the GREAT ideas! I'll try to get some gift cards together now, and then pull some other things together for when he's a little more with it.

I mentioned in another thread, but this is the same relative who had an accident in the same EXACT intersection that my dad had his fatal accident 15 years ago. How screwed up is that?! So we're just so thankful that he's still alive. Not only that, his brother was in a near-fatal accident a couple of years ago, and guess who was on-call when he was airlifted into our hospital? Yup, my DH. Crazy.

Canice · #10 11-10-2009, 04:23 PM

No offense, Amy, but if I go visit you I think I'll rent a car, thanks - no need to pick me up

.

Seriously, though, I'm glad your cousin is moving out of the ICU, and hope for all the best in his recovery. I'm sure your cards and thoughts will be much appreciated; I'm sure you'll know when you can provide something more material for him. In the mean time, I think staying in touch with his parents and supporting them is the best thing you can do. They are fortunate that you are so thoughtful.

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